Fifty Shades of Love
by CatchingMyStars
Summary: This is the sequel to Fifty Shades of Infidelity. What happens when Ana finds out she has Christian's child? Will the two of them fall apart or remain strong?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: After the honeymoon

**Author's note!**

**Alright, I was really thinking about killing this story off and focusing on Ethan… but I could not resist doing this. This happens in book three, when Ana finds out about her child. Please follow me and favourite this! (: It's really encouraging. Also, I set up an emo/loner tumblr account, HAHAHAA. I'm catchingmystars . tumblr . com**

The core within my chest was pounding a little too loudly for my liking, as if trying to get caught. An unwelcome thought crept into my mind; How long until another little heart would beat within me?

_My inner goddess pursed her red lips and shook her head at me. You can't think about these things. He won't like it. _

As if responding to her accusation, my husband's grey eyes met mine and he stroked my arm lovingly with the back of his hand. "Of course she's perfect." Christian told the table of his best men, "That's why I married her."

The board of directors that had watched me sexually harass him over Skype gave their nods of approvals, sweet smiles of envy and happiness playing across their faces. My jaw clenched involuntarily, the burden of this secret becoming too much for me to bear after the past three days I had kept it.

It had not been easy. Within the first minute of finding out, I had almost jumped at the opportunity of telling Christian over the phone when he made his routine stalker call. But I remembered him telling me countless of times that he did not want children. Right from the start, he had made arrangements to maneuver around that touchy topic.

Unfortunately, the panic of work I had been baptized in after my honeymoon around the world, eradicated my monthly appointments with the good doctor. Dr. Greene had tried repeatedly to reach past my secretary, Claire, but to no avail. Christian had made me CEO of Grey Publishing, the revamped version of SIP. I had been busied with courses to equip myself for my new role and had to juggle with all his public appearances that I had to attend.

I sighed inwardly. These were all excuses that were never going to get me anywhere. The problem still existed; I had his child growing within me right at this moment. A child that he would not want.

Holding this secret had manifested in deafly forms. On the first night, I had dreamt that Christian had forced me to abort the child. I flinched at the raw emotions that had accompanied such a painful event that I would never go through with. My parents personally had been strong advocates of anti-abortion, simply because it damaged not only the child but also including the mother's life forever.

On the second night, I had dreamt that upon finding out about our child, Christian had tossed me out of his apartment. Heartless and cold, he had chased me out of Escala and sent me divorce papers in the mail. This dream seemed more of the possibility. I knew full well how many other blue-eyed brunettes in the world that were not impregnated with his child there were. He could and would leave me in a blink of an eye.

The third night had been constructed by the devil itself. Christian had fled the moment I confessed the ugly truth to him. I found him later in the playroom with five different brunette subs, all vaguely resembling me. I had watched him punish each and everyone of them, then he f***ed them like an animal. After which, he said his goodbyes to me.

My unborn child was four and a half weeks old by now. My head had concluded that I could never tell Christian about this child. Never would I want to find out which reaction would be the right one.

"Marsala for you, Ana?" Christian whispered into my ear softly, so quiet and tender.

"M-m-m-arsala?" I stuttered, nervous. From all the dramatic manuscripts I had read, pregnancy and alcohol should never mix. I recalled all the miscarriages and birth defects that had molded the characters.

His answering smile was breath taking. "You've never tried?" He chuckled a little before taking my glass and tipping the wine bottle to mine. "You've probably tasted it in your food and never knew."

I gulped. "Probably." I stared wide-eyed at the liquid. If I did not drink this, Christian would know something is up. I needed some pregnancy books pronto, the real factual ones, to help me distinguish myths. He beckoned me to try and I conceded, tasting the wine. It was sweet and refreshing on my tongue. "It's good."

Christian beamed, a cherubic grin across his face. "I'll only let you drink the best."

"Thank you." I said.

His smile faltered just slightly, "Are you alright?"

_Of course not, my inner goddess snapped. I have our child and you just poisoned him!_

"Just a little tired." I ignored her, faking a yawn for show.

Christian flicked his wrist to reveal his new Rolex. Boys and their toys. "It's eight in the evening, Ana." There was a hint of worry in his voice.

_Cover up! My inner goddess instructed. _

I forced a laugh, "Rough day at work, Mr. Grey. Some of us actually have to work."

He shook his head at me and kissed me against my cheekbone. "Your smart mouth is hilarious, Mrs. Grey. Besides, you don't have to work another day of your life if you didn't want to."

"But I love my job. Bossing about Jack Hyde and all." I felt sorry for the man. He remained in his current position while I rose through the ranks faster than the Titanic could sink.

Christian snorted, satisfied. "Anybody who sets their eyes on you won't get far in life."

"You did." I pointed out with narrowed eyes, gesticulating to this entire event. Christian Grey's rise into the trillionaire boards had to be constantly celebrated. Tonight's event was to welcome the new business associates Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc had secured.

He nuzzled my ear, his teeth subtly grazing across my ear lobe. "Because I have you."

"Mr. Grey." Someone across the table said.

Reluctantly, Christian pulled from me and turned to receive the question. Before I knew it, the two men along with their counterparts dived head first into a discussion about more mergers and more acquisitions. Part of me wished they would all bring their wives as well, that way, I would have some form of a normal conversation. If I spoke up now, all these people would know how incompatible I was for Christian.

_You can talk to me, my inner goddess rolled her eyes. We have loads to talk about. _

I flipped my inner goddess and sighed inwardly once more. Babies. I was going to have a baby. My thoughts painted a picture of a bouncing baby boy in my arms, his brunette hair paired with his gorgeous grey eyes. Half Christian and half me. My parents would come over to take care of their grandchild. I could just imagine the joy and happiness Grace and Carrick would have about the child.

Mia would go shopping with Kate for all my child's clothes. I could see it now. Our house would be littered with baby clothing of all sorts of classy brands before he would be born. Elliot would be teasing us about our sex life with no doubt, asking how we got around the baby. It put a soft smile across my face just thinking about it.

_But they're not the ones who matter, my inner goddess shook her head at my idealistic thinking._

She was right. Christian Grey would not be pleased. What if he shunned the child? I was frightened by the thought of our child growing up un-loved by his father.

"Let's go." Christian interrupted my brooding, his hand on my shoulder.

"Hm?"

He directed his view to the men around the table, "Thank you all for joining us tonight. My wife and I will be taking our leave."

There were a few grunts. "Oh come on, Grey. So early? You're getting old!" One of them teased.

Christian laughed good-naturedly. Never one to be pointing fingers, he bid the man farewell. "I wouldn't be this exhausted if you all did more work!" He taunted back, which was met with a round of laughter from the guys. This was my husband. My bold, confident and sexy husband.

I was going to lose him and all this once he found out about the baby. I could feel it in my bones.

He helped me up from my seat and swung an arm around my shoulders as he led me out of the event hall. On the way out, many of the people present rose from their seats to shake our hands. So many people my husband met and knew, so many who loved him. I sighed once more.

Taylor joined us as we reached the lobby. "Mr. Grey, is anything the problem?"

This only made me feel even worse about myself. Did Christian never leave this early from events and functions?

"Nothing at all, Taylor." Christian waved away the man's concern. "Ana's just feeling a little tired."

"Of course," Like a father would, Taylor scanned my exterior. "The car is waiting."

"Thank you." I whispered as Taylor opened the Audi door for me. Christian guided me up to the seats and I smiled at Luke who was behind the wheel.

Luke had known something was up from the moment I had stepped into Dr. Greene's office. Thankfully, he was keeping it to himself. Luke rose his eyebrows discreetly in question of my well-being and I gave him a subtle shake of my head in reply. Even through our wedding and honeymoon, Luke still remained my good friend and confidante. I trusted him and he took care of me.

Through the past few months, I had learned to understand the works behind Christian and Taylor's relationships. Something so professional could be so intimate as well. At times, I felt like Taylor knew more about Christian than I did.

"Thank you." I told Christian as Sawyer drove off. I wrapped my arms around Christian's waist, snuggling into his chest.

He chuckled, a hand stroking my thigh. "Whatever for?"

"For understanding." I twisted so I could look into his grey eyes. "I'm sorry for being a party-pooper."

"Oh trust me, Ana." He laughed. "Not much of a party to be pooped on." I laughed with him and we shook as one. "Besides, I'd much rather spend time alone with you."

I flushed at his words. Christian's fingertips grazed my cheeks gingerly, a fire within his eyes burning with his love for me. He was always so intense. I reached to catch his fingers in mine and I brought them to my lips. "I love you, Mr. Grey."

In response, he brought my wedding ring to his lips. "As I love you, Mrs. Grey."

_Not for longgggggg, my inner goddess sang. _

**Review and favourite so I know whether I should continueee :)  
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**You could be happy; Snow Patrol**

**No One's gonna love you ;Band of horses**

**Detlef sCHREMPF; Band of horses**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Snowball Effect

**Author's Note!**

**Helllloooooo. Yes, so the story will be continued from this link. It's much easier that way, isn't it? Thank you all for your never-ending support. After all, we aim to please. Please enjoy this one! And, I just wanted to say that I'm not giving up on the Ethan/Ana story. It's just a little harder to come up with a story line than this one. But yes, a third chapter is in the works. **

"Ana, baby." Christian cooed. I turned to watch him stretch out across the bed, naked. "I've got a party to attend tonight..." He pouted in his maddeningly sexy way. "Will you come?"

My fingers traced across his pout, unable to resist the magnetic pull. "Whose birthday is it?"

He laughed a sardonic laugh. "Birthday? Sweetheart, it's an elite mixer."

"Elite mixer?" My eyebrows rose, as I questioned, not sure what I was expecting from my trillionaire husbandaire. I thought I had seen it all. From major events to anniversaries, from engagement parties to weddings, from business events to formal dances. The list was endless.

"Wine and cheese. Just be yourself, they'll love you." He said, nipping my waist with his teeth.

Wine and cheese. My heart fell. I had already taken the risk with that Marsala two nights ago. I cannot possibly put my little blip's life on the line once more. What if my little blip...

_Dies? Isn't that the point? My inner goddess snapped. _

Did I want that? The mere thought horrified me. I could poison my growing child bit by bit until he... I could pretend I never knew I was pregnant. I could just... Miscarry.

_My inner goddess nodded at me from her yoga pose. She was lying flat on her stomach, as if boasting that she was not with child like I was. _

My conscience shook her head at me. No. I could not do that. This child growing within me sought me as his protector, his nurturer, his... Mother. Even if he was fatherless. "I don't know..." I started, reaching for Christian's hand. "I don't feel up for wine or cheese."

It was his turn to raise his eyebrows. "I was under the impression that you were quite the alcoholic."

"Excuse me?" I smacked him and he chortled, raising his hands in surrender as he pulled the sheet over his naked groin area.

Christian gave me a shrug and he blew me a kiss, "It's alright, Mrs Grey. I've got your drinking habits under lock and key." I narrowed my eyes at him and smacked my lips. He lost the smile and looked sincerely concerned, "Are you sick?"

Was I sick? "No... I don't think so."

He looked widely unconvinced, his hand reaching around my waist to draw me into his chest. "Should I call Dr. Greene?"

A little too quickly, I shook my head and pulled away. The doctor was already expecting Christian and I to go down for our very first sonogram. There was no way I could let them communicate. None at all.

"Ana? Is everything okay?"

_Now's your chance to tell him! My inner goddess practically jabbed me in the ribs. _

And risk losing everything? "Of course it is. I just need to pee and get to work."

Christian groaned, falling back into the pillows as I directed myself to the toilet. "Forget work!"

"We're not all trillionaires, Grey." We had been over this practically a million times already. Maybe we should go over it a trillion times to match with his current financial status.

"Because we can be trillionaire's wives!" Christian hollered back.

I looked at myself in the mirror and shook my head. I had to work for myself in case of emergencies... Times like these especially. I could not rely on Christian financially. The moment he found out about this child... Subconsciously, my hand came to cradle my flat belly. Very soon, my child would show.

I could not hide this child from Christian forever.

Thank goodness no Prenup was signed. Christian would have forced his money upon me otherwise. Now, I could slip through the cracks without his cash if we were divorced.

When you get divorced, my inner goddess corrected me with a snarky smirk.

There was no way I could see Christian accepting this child with open arms. He would not. I was so sure of it. But... A stubborn hope in me refused to die. "Christian?" I chanted, caressing my belly.

"Yeah, Ana?" He replied lazily, still lounging in bed no doubt.

"One of my friends at work is pregnant." I lied.

"Well, it's not Claire is it?" Christian clarified. "Because Claire isn't married so that would be a little unethical."

So marriage seemed to be a factor in accepting a child. The last time Christian and I had discussed this, we were not married... Maybe..."Nope. Someone you don't know."

"Well! Let's send her a congratulations hamper full of pregnancy books and food, shall we?" Always kind-hearted, Christian suggested heartily. A congratulations. Did that mean a child would be worth a celebration?

I stepped back out of the toilet and leaned against the wooden door arch. He watched me with his hands behind his head, a sexy smolder radiating off his eyes. "She can't wait to have a child."

"Well of course. Children are bundles of joy!" Christian sang, feeding the hope within me. "But not for us..." My heart fell. "I don't think children are a good idea for us."

"Why?" I asked softly, weak with defeat.

"Imagine how your body would change... The sex will change, Ana." Christian nodded at my current figure with satisfaction. "I'm a sexual man." He winked at me but I could not bring myself to smile in response.

I stayed there stunned in my position, shocked on so many different levels. "You don't want children at all?"

Christian sat up slowly, "Not until five or ten years later. Why? Did you want children?" I swallowed. I used my palms to cover both my elbows and gave him a shrug. "We don't need children, Ana. We have each other."

Oh hell. What did he expect me to do? Hold the foetus within me for another five or ten years? "I'm going to work." I announced, grabbing the clothes I lay out the day before. Not wanting to risk him seeing my baby bump, if any, I changed in the toilet.

"So... I'll pick you up at 6?" Christian questioned.

For wine and cheese. I supposed I could go without drinking anything. There was still cheese, right? "That'll be perfect." I told Christian as I immersed from the toilet.

The sexy burn in his face was back as he winked at me, "There's my gorgeous CEO of Grey Publishing."

"I can't believe I'm CEO..." After so long, I still felt like I was under Jack Hyde. Even though I had not seen Jack since before my honeymoon and in addition, I was in the main office of Grey's Publishing, I did not feel like a CEO. I simply was not CEO material.

"Don't start this." The epitome of CEO clenched his jaw. Everything about him oozed CEO and in comparison to him, I paled. How could someone like me be the same as Christian? Anyone who heard I was CEO would definitely suspect Christian had a hand in it. Which he did.

But I had enough on my plate as it is already. "Goodbye." I told Christian, "See you later." I reached for my Chanel office bag and swung it over my shoulder, still unaccustomed to the strong leather smell.

Before Christian could protest, I slipped out of the bedroom. Luke, Taylor and Gail were buzzing about the kitchen. "Good morning, everyone." I greeted rather monotonously.

"Morning, Ana." They said in unison.

"I've packed you some salmon wraps along yoghurt." Gail beamed at me, handing over my lunch box.

"Thank you." I gave her a smile.

"Ready to go?" Luke stretched as he rose from the seat, straightening his shirt and grabbing the car keys. I nodded.

Taylor gave me a flutter of his fingers in farewell. "Take care of Christian." I shook my finger at him and followed Luke out to the lifts.

"Ana?" Christian's voice echoed through the lift lobby.

My lift 'pinged' just as he made it to view. He was shirtless but had managed to pull on a pair of pants that hung in that maddeningly sexy way. I wished nothing more than to get out of Christian's grasp at the moment. "I'll see you later, Mr. Grey."

"Is everything okay?" He asked, stepping closer to us.

I entered the lift with Luke at my side. "I'm just late, bye." I waved at my disheveled and confused husband as the doors closed. There was a brief moment of silence.

"Ana, is there anything I should know?" Luke raised his eyebrows and folded his arms.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Unfortunately, my nibbling of my bottom lip drew suspicion and Luke narrowed his eyes, unimpressed. "I just can't tell anyone right now."

That seemed to tick Luke off majorly; he let out an irritated sigh. "You're kidding. Haven't you learnt what keeping secrets and thoughts to yourself can damage?"

Of course, he was referring to my pre-marriage days. One of the more major ones would be avoiding Christian when I had seen the whole office scene and the second would be ignoring Luke when I thought he had betrayed me. But this was different. The fact was that I had a child, there was nothing to be discussed. Christian had even pointed out that children were not on his to-do list until five or ten years later.

_Five or ten years later? _Was I even okay with that? Ever since I was in university, my motherly instincts had somewhat kicked in. Children were everywhere and they were adorable. I had thought of having children, thought of having five even. But I had married a man who may not even want to have children at all.

_Should've thought about that before you married him, my inner goddess said sourly. She had once dreamt and longed for kids as well._

"It's different, I assure you." I tried for convincing when Luke held the elevator doors open for me.

Upon stepping out, my phone jumped like a fish out of water. Claire. "Morning, Claire."

"Good morning, Ana!" She chimed, happy as always.

"How can I help you?" Luke opened the door for me and I climbed in.

"A Dr. Greene called for you last night. But since it was past your hours, I thought I'd tell you this morning instead."

Good call, I thought to myself. Christian would have found out otherwise. "Yup, thank you. So, what did she want?"

"Dr. Greene flagged your appointment today as a red, she called to remind you not to miss it." Right. Of course, missing too many appointments had brought me to where I was today.

"Definitely." I said. "Tell her I'll be there."

"Perfect." Claire tapped at her laptop. "But you have a client's appointment that clashes, Ana."

"Push it back or re-schedule. The appointment's a red." I instructed carelessly, Luke's interest was peaked and he stared at me questioningly.

"Alright, your doctor's appointment will be at 5PM." Shit. Was that cutting it too close? Christian was due around 6PM. He definitely could not see me coming in just when he arrived.

"Can we try for 4.30PM? Or maybe earlier. Any open slots." I sounded desperate, which reflected my physical state of freaking out and cold sweat.

There was a pause. "I'll call Dr. Greene and get back to you."

"Thank you, Claire. I'll see you in ten minutes." With that, I ended the call and buried my phone in my handbag.

Luke cleared his throat expectantly, waiting for me to explain.

"I can't." I told him. "I really can't."

"You can trust me, Ana." Luke stopped at the red light, his gaze searching me. "I thought I've proven that."

I closed my eyes to prevent his glare of accusation from breaking me. "You'll tell someone and anyone would tell Christian."

"Christian may be my employer, but my loyalty lies with you." Luke said reassuringly. "You're the one I'm taking care of, Ana, and I can't take care of you if I don't know what's wrong."

Luke was right in more ways than one. I was now faced with a brick wall with nowhere else to go. "Come with me later," I whispered. "To Dr. Greene's." I opened my eyes in time to see him nod. Christian most definitely would not be coming for any Dr. Greene appointments, so I would need all the support I could get.

"Thank you, Ana." Luke gave me a tight smile as he pulled up outside my office building.

"No, thank you." I returned the smile, knowing that his support was something I would need to pull through this.

The office building Christian had bought for Grey Publishing's new headquarters was a tall skyscraper. He rented out all the other floors to various companies, but kept the highest six stories for Grey Publishing. In a matter of weeks, the rest of Grey Publishing would be moving into the same building. My office was on the highest floor of all, overlooking Seattle's gorgeous skyline every time I peered out. As location was precise with Christian, this building was just a mere five-minute drive and ten-minute walk from his own office.

"Good morning, Mrs. Grey." The security men gave me a good nod.

"Good morning, Paul and Andrew. Hope you had a good night." These two men worked in the same company as Luke, hence, they were rather close.

"We sure did, thank you." They said in unison. Luke came to stand by them as I reached the lobby.

"Good morning, Mrs. Grey." The two receptionist ladies rose to their feet. One of them walked me to the elevator lobby.

"Good morning, Giselle and Charlotte." I greeted them back. "Thank you, Giselle." I told the sweet lady as she held the elevator door open for me. "Have a nice day."

Ever since Christian and I had gotten married, everybody's response to me changed. I was no longer someone to be ignored. Everybody greeted me as I passed and went out of their way to make me comfortable. This was the advantage that came with wealth and power, this was Christian's lifestyle.

It saddened me to think of it all being wiped away. Divorce papers clouded my vision as I sunk back into the classy elevator mirrors. I placed my hand on my stomach, feeling for a nonexistent bulge. I would lose my husband. Was keeping this baby worth it at all?

**Try; Pink**

**The Great Escape; Pink**

**State of Grace; Taylor Swift**

**PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW AND FAVOURITEEEE :)**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Wine, Cheese and a Baby.

**Author's note!**

**Alright, so this is coming in a bit earlier than I thought it would be. Which may imply you wouldn't be getting another update until next week. Hope you enjoy this one :)**

"And who is this fine gentleman that has accompanied you?" Dr. Greene questioned with a knowing beam. She has seen him around me for quite some time now, but had meet been introduced.

"I'm Luke Sawyer, ma'am." Luke extended a hand, slightly nervous to be in the office of my lady doctor. He was still oblivious to why he was here.

Dr. Greene smiled warmly as she took it, "It's a pleasure to meet you, Ana will need your support... Speaking of which," she turned to address me, "Where is Mr. Grey?"

"He's busy at work." I was not lying exactly... Christian simply was not informed.

Dr. Greene gave a disapproving shake of her head. Clearly, she was one of those doctors that insisted both parents would be present for baby appointments. I shrugged, as if it could not be helped.

"Well, do tell him I expect him to be here the next appointment." Dr. Greene stated matter-of-factly.

"Alright, take a seat Luke." She gestured towards the empty seat by me. "No need to be nervous." Luke let out an awkward laugh which made me smile. He was just as nervous as I was. "Now, Mrs Grey, have you noticed any changes to your body?"

Luke shuffled uncomfortably.

I shook my head. I felt perfectly normal.

"You can expect the nausea to start in about one or two weeks. Although most women have it, others may not and you just may be one of the lucky ones." Dr. Greene clasped her hands together as she spoke.

Nausea? "Like... Morning sickness?"

"Yes, so in due time, I expect you to increase food intake in expectation. It's morning sickness but it occurs throughout the day, so just be prepared."

"Morning sickness?" Luke coughed out, too surprised.

Dr. Greene nodded at him, "Ana, would you like to do a sonogram to see the child?"

Luke stopped breathing and so did I. I had never expected to see my child... Definitely not today. If Christian decided not to have this child... It would be too much for me to handle. To see my beautiful child growing in me, to see his little hands forming along with his toes and know that he was to be removed. It would pain me too much.

"No." Luke spoke up before I could.

We both turned to look at Luke, who was glaring at me. "Doctor, could we please have a moment?"

Uncertain to what was happening, Dr. Greene reluctantly agreed and left the room. The wooden door shut, creating an echo in the room as Luke glared me down.

He folded his arms crossly, "You're pregnant?"

I could only nod.

"Christian doesn't know." He stated, not even a question. "Why the hell not?"

"You've heard him... He doesn't want a child. He's going to make me abort him, I know it." I felt myself defensive, as if I had anticipated Luke to take my side.

"It doesn't matter what he you think he thinks," Luke growled, throwing his hands up in the air. "He deserves to know."

I shook my head, "He'll take my child."

"The child's not just yours!" He gave an incredulous narrowing of his eyes. "Christian's supposed to be here, not me. I can't just sit here and go through with this sonogram... He's the father, Ana. He should be the first to see his child."

If only that were true. The conversation I had with Christian this morning immersed in my mind. "He won't want to see him... He said this morning he doesn't want children until five or ten years later. This child..." I held my belly and cradled it. "Will not be loved by his father."

"Anastasia, stop this!" Luke was exasperated. "You can't put words in his mouth and imagine his reaction before actually seeing it. Stop. Running." He spat through his teeth.

"I'm protecting my child!" I screeched. Both hands crossing my belly in defense.

Luke put a hand on my shoulder, his eyes narrowing further. "You have to tell him."

The three possible scenarios replayed themselves in my head and I was suddenly frightened. I did not want to find out how he felt about the baby, I could only expect the worst. I did not want to be thrown out of Christian's life. Now that Luke was in the loop, there seemed to be only one way out.

"I'll abort the child." I was breathless but my heart thumped noisily. Luke's eyes widened in surprise, his grip on me softened. "I can't face him until I abort the child."

Luke took some time to regain his composure. "It's the pregnancy hormones talking right now, sweetie. You're just slightly hysterical."

The tears began to slip from my eyes, sliding down my cheekbones. I craved Christian's embrace and approval, I craved for his company. Luke gently tugged me into his chest, his arms cuddling my close as I cried. "Don't be frightened, Ana."

My tears streamed uncontrollably, a much needed cathartic release that I had held back the last few days. Luke soothed me with his palm against my back. Even in his embrace, it was not enough. I wanted Christian to tell me that everything was going to be alright.

"Okay, okay." Luke calmed me slightly. "I won't tell Christian. You can take all the time you need, just calm down and think things through."

I nodded into his chest. An abortion seemed like the only way out now because I was looking at it from a microscopic point of view. I needed the time to step back and view the big picture instead of the red dot on it.

There was a knock on the door. "Is everything alright?" Dr. Greene probed and I heard her step into the office. "Oh my, what's wrong with Mrs. Grey?"

"She's just nervous, it's driven her slightly hysterical." Luke answered steadily, not revealing anything she should not know.

"Of course, yes. These hormone rushes will be quite persistent, so please do take care of her." Dr. Greene instructed with a stern warning in her tone.

"I think we should reschedule this appointment, ma'am." Luke spoke on my behalf. "Ana's too shaken at the moment."

"Of course. I'll speak to Claire, her assistant." Dr. Greene was very understanding as Luke began to help me up to my feet.

"Thank you." I muttered when she held the door open for the both of us.

Gracing me with one of the brightest smiles I had ever seen, she gave me a pat on the head. "It's all very new, but with friends and family to support you, you will pull through."

At her words, I clutched onto Luke tighter. He was the only one I was going to share this with and probably the only one who was going to support me through this. Opening my teary eyes wider, I was about to thank him when someone caught my eye.

"Take care of your child." Dr. Greene waved, throwing fuel into the blossoming misunderstanding before us. "I'll see the both of you soon."

"Ana? Sawyer?"

I swallowed, truly petrified this time round. My hands went clammy around Luke's waist as the distance between us slowly grew shorter and shorter. My secret was about to be exposed once more.

Luke cleared his throat and took a step forward to meet her. "Dr. Trevylan-Grey."

Grace's eyes filled with horror and surprise, twice the intensity that had painted Luke's. She shifted her glance, alternating between Dr. Greene's office and our embrace. I watched as she filled in the blanks herself, inferring from the most recent words she had heard from the doctor.

"Does Christian..." Her hand came to her mouth in torment. "...know?"

That made me sob more and I turned my head into Luke's chest once more. Luke remained silent, knowing full well that I had forced him into secrecy just moments ago. It was up to me to explain this, explain how I was depressed over bearing Christian's child.

_Beep, beep, beep. _

All our attentions turned to Grace's pager that was clipped to her clipboard. The screen of the small device turned red in light of an emergency. Just as it did, a group of nurses raced past us.

"Grace!" A passing doctor called, stopping to gesture for her to follow. "It's critical in the ICUs!"

Conflicted, Grace stood rooted in her place. I observed as she cracked, uncertain which situation called for her immediate attention. "GRACE!" The doctor snapped once more, his face a portrait of fluster and worry. "The bacterium is spreading!"

"Go." I whispered.

But it was enough to convince the devoted doctor. Grace furrowed her eyebrows at me before turning to speed after the hoard of nurses and doctors. This baby would still be here eight months from now with abortion tucked away at the back of my mind.

* * *

"This red wine is absolutely divine." Christian clinked his wine glass gently with Georgia and Henry, Chicago's billionaire couple. I listened quietly as the three of them began talking alcohol, wine in particular.

Luke was standing just a few feet away, right beside Taylor. Taylor had his eyes trained on the entrance, scanning and scrutinizing anybody who stepped into the dining hall. On the other hand, Luke kept his gaze fixed on me, watching my every move and possibly dying of a heart attack every time I almost bumped into anybody.

I had avoided wine at all costs. After all, I had to face it, I was pregnant. Since an abortion was out of the question, surely, a miscarriage was too. After our run in with Grace, anything 'hush-hush' was out of the question. If I lost this child, Luke and Grace would know. If I aborted this child, Grace and Luke would be infuriated.

Christian let loose a carefree laugh, leaning back onto the wooden table as Henry handed him some cheese to try it with. I felt awful. We had finally gotten to a place where we were both so happy and at ease with one another. I had to forget my shot and end up with his child.

"And Anastasia?" Georgia beckoned for my attention as I snapped out of my thought process. She smiled at me sweetly, her eyes twinkling in envy of Christian as my husband. "You haven't drank all night… I fear that you're not a wine enthusiast."

_Show time, my inner goddess sang. She threw on a pair of Gucci shades and buttoned her floral Chanel blouse._

Perfect wife alert. I tried my best to giggle, "Oh trust me, there was once a time where Christian here," I patted his chest, "had to lock the alcohol cabinet to keep it away from me."

Part of being Christian's wife called for the ability to entertain. Better relationships would lead to prospect clients and potential business growth. Just as I had expected, the couple laughed in response.

"But you've yet to drink anything, are you thirsty at all?" Henry charmed, his eyes smoldering in the dim light. "I could get you a drink if you like."

"That's not necessary." Christian was suddenly edgy and slightly cold, his arm snaking protectively around my waist. "I can take care of my own wife."

Henry let out a low whistle and put his hands up in mock surrender, "Hey, just trying to be friendly."

"Oh Henry." Georgia gushed as she leaned against Henry's shoulder, "You could learn a thing or to about protecting your woman from Christian here." Henry all but rolled his eyes and pursed his lips at Georgia, not oblivious to her flirtation attempts directed at Christian.

Before the atmosphere got more awkward, I reached for the glass of white wine sitting on the wooden table. "Alright, alright, no need to get all tense," I shook my head at them playfully. "If you want me to drink, I'll drink." Pressing the wine glass to my lips, I took a swig of the cool bubbly liquid.

The couple clapped for me and Christian smiled.

"Mrs. Grey, that glass is unsanitary." Luke's scolded softly, withholding his anger at my irresponsible action. He waited for me to let go of the glass before taking it away from me, his eyes cautioning me to behave.

Christian watched him leave with a confused expression; those glasses had only just been recently poured by the waiters.

"It's alright, come, have another." Henry grabbed one more and extended it out to me.

Just as I was about to reach for it, I met Luke's killer glare. "Um," I swallowed. "It's okay, the wine didn't taste too good anyway."

"Please excuse us." Christian was distracted as he tugged me away from the couple. He rested both palms on either side of my shoulder and stared into my soul with his blazing grey eyes. "Something's going on, Ana. What is it?"

Under his gaze, I squirmed. If I thought Luke's scrutiny was overwhelming, Christian's was definitely suffocating. I had to give myself some time to break away from the chains he had my mind in before I could come up with something to say, "Nothing. I'm just not feeling very well."

Still skeptical to my explanation, but as loving as he was, Christian sighed. "You should've told me earlier. We wouldn't have come."

"I don't want you to miss any of your public appearances," I started and before he could argue, I added, "And I would never let you attend them alone either."

"Alright, no more drinks tonight Ana." He conceded, pulling me close to press his lips against my forehead. "We'll leave after my speech, sweetheart. Just bear with it a little." I felt his hands lock around my lower back, soaking up the feel of my skin against his. "In the morning I'll call Dr. Greene over."

"We now welcome Seattle's finest businessman, Christian Grey, to give a few words." The host of this entire party whose name I had forgotten raised a glass towards us.

Christian offered me a reassuring smile and a quick I'll-be-right-back wink before walking towards the spotlight. Everybody around us erupted into a round of applause. As expected, Luke seized the chance to stand by me, his arms rigid around himself.

He leaned in subtly, "That was mighty irresponsible of you."

I laughed along with the crowd as Christian cracked a cute joke, "I know, I won't do it again."

"It's not a matter of apologies, Ana." Luke grunted, displeased at my attitude. "It's life or death and it's not even your life right now."

Luke was right. I sighed and gave him a conceded nod. What was I thinking when I drank that gulp of wine?

"You're not still thinking of dropping the child are you?" Luke probed worriedly as Christian began to round up his speech.

I glanced at Luke, his panic apparent under his controlled form. "I'm trying not to think of that."

Luke's jaw clenched, about to say something when he was interrupted by a returning Christian. "Ana, Sawyer." Christian said, puzzled. "Sawyer, ready the car."

"Right away, sir." Still trying to send me signals with his eyes, Luke raised his hand slightly to grab Taylor's attention.

Christian's eyebrows furrowed as he took my hand protectively, not understanding what was going on. Luke spun on his feet and headed towards Taylor. "What was that about?"

I could lie once more, "I have no clue."

Christian did not believe me for one minute, but he was not one to make a scene in public. "We will discuss this at home."

I loved how he referred to Escala as home. Our home. "Of course."

Taylor joined our stride as we descended the ballroom steps to the lobby. "Mr. Grey, Dr. Trevylan-Grey is currently at Escala."

At the mere mention of her name, my heart sunk into the deep sea. My eyes swam momentarily but I held onto Christian and forced my legs to keep the momentum. _I was so screwed._ Without a doubt, she was going to confront me about what she saw earlier today.

"Oh, that's fantastic!" Christian chimed genuinely, happy that he was about to see his mother. "Now we won't need Dr. Greene in the morning."

Luke caught my shocked expression as we reached the car, immediately picking up on my vibe. He held the door open for me and tried his best to reassure me silently. There was nothing he could say or do that would change the impending conflict.

I had thought I would have a little more time to prepare myself, to ready myself to tell Christian the truth. But now my fate was gushing towards me at the speed of light, Christian was going to be fifty shades of f*cking angry. Crossing my fingers, I prayed to God that Taylor would drive at the speed of a snail.

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**Say Goodnight; Click Five**

**The Reason why; Click Five**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Heart Attack

**Author's Note!**

**Hahaha alright. Initially, this wasn't supposed to come on until next week. However, a certain Girlofmidnight is having surgery in a few days and didn't want to miss this. So, everybody say thank you. Please, favorite and review if you like. Thank you so much!**

My heart was pounding in my chest, trying to save itself from the impending doom. I glanced sideways at Christian, his fingers were laced with mine and he looked joyously at peace. None of that was going to last. There was going to be screaming, shouting and crying. The moment the lift doors open, I knew my fate was sealed.

Luke had beaten us to the top, already waiting for us by the lift. He gave me a subtle nod in support, a desire burning in his eyes to do something and anything to stop what was about to happen. He knew I was not mentally prepared to expose this enormously large secret.

Grace was sitting comfortably in the living room, her legs crossed as she waited for us. But my attention was drawn to the absolute silence in the room, the television off and no music was on. Grace's thought process was loud enough to fill the room, bouncing off the walls and feeding my insecurities.

"Mom." Christian greeted with a little boy smile.

Grace's head snapped up instantly, out of the sea of thoughts she was swimming in. Her eyes were saturated with stress and worry, flicking over to shoot daggers at me.

_My inner goddess began layering herself with bulletproof vests, then proceeded to hiding herself behind a huge SWAT shield._

In comparison, I was exposed. Nothing was going to save me now. "Grace." I greeted with a sheepish and forced smile.

Christian walked us both over to where his mother was sitting, "Mom, Ana hasn't been feeling well lately. Could you maybe give her a check-up?"

Grace nodded, but I did not miss her judgmental glare. As if this was my cover to hide my pregnancy from her son. "Of course, come, Ana." She patted the spot on the couch.

Just when I was about to lower myself down, Christian released his hand from mine. I observed as he dug out the phone in his pocket. It must have been on silent, because I never heard it ring. "Sorry," He said apologetically, "I'll have to take this."

"Go ahead." I smiled encouragingly at him, glad even that I could get him out of the room first. Maybe I could convince Grace to keep this all a secret, just like I had swayed Luke.

Leaning in, Christian planted a kiss on my forehead. "I'll be right back, sweetheart." Spinning on his heels, he strutted towards the office and closed the door behind him.

There was a stretch of silence as both Grace and I stared at each other. Just as she was, I was lost for words. There was nothing I could say to make this all better. My mother-in-law hated me now, I knew it.

"How far along are you?" Grace's voice was weak.

"Four weeks." My reply was mechanic, my brain still wrecking itself to search for an excuse and a way out from this confession.

Her eyes filled with shock and horror, I watched as she counted back. It may seem that not wanting children ran in the family, because her face paled. "How?"

What? We had sex of course. This baby was probably formed when Christian was f*cking me, not even out of love. But these thoughts had to be kept to myself, I shrugged my shoulders.

"How could you do this?!" She hissed under her breath, all of a sudden incredibly angry.

"I'm protecting this child. Christian will insist on an abortion." I defended myself, crossing my arms protectively around my baby.

Grace shook her head at me in disbelief, "Of course he'll demand an abortion!"

My blood turned cold and sweat trickled down my spine. I knew it. I knew it. I bloody knew it. Even Christian's own mother knew how Christian would respond to this all. He would ask for an abortion. I cannot tell him. "That's why I can't tell him, Grace. Can't you see that?" I was pleading now.

"So you'll raise the child?" She almost screeched. I thanked the heavens for the thick wooden door of the office; None of this would grace Christian's ears.

I nodded at her, "I need to raise this child, with or without Christian's support."

"So you expect him to just go along with this? To raise your child?" She clenched her jaw, unhappy with my decision.

What the hell. It was his child too. I pursed my lips, "If he wants a divorce, I'll go through with it."

Grace ran her fingers through her hair as she deliberated it. "Ana… you should have never made such a silly mistake. I really did like you."

It pained my heart that she was using past tense. I had already fallen out of my mother in law's favour. Next, it would be Christian's. My fate would be sealed. I was to raise this child as a divorcee.

My mind painted the future. I could see myself bouncing a beautiful and stunning baby boy that had eyes belonging to his father. Even though I could not think of names now, I knew I would love the child to the ends of the earth and back. Even though he would not have a father to raise him, I would not fail him. I will teach him everything he needed to know and protect him from the things he did not.

"What about the prenup?" Of course, that was in contention, I had married a wealthy man.

"None was signed." I sighed, upset that I was still perceived as a gold digger. "I don't want any money."

Grace looked utterly broken by my actions. If only I had kept to my monthly shots. If only. I hated myself. If I had, I would still be happy with my Christian. I would still be loved by Grace. But I knew that deep down inside of me, I was glad that there was a little Grey growing within me.

"When are you going to tell him?" Grace was defeated, too upset to look at me. Instead, we both turned to stare at the closed office door.

"I don't…" I palmed my face in torture. "I don't know."

"You can't keep him in the dark forever." Grace disapproved. "Tell me you're not thinking about leaving him out of the blue and sending divorce papers in the mail."

I looked up at her. That was a brilliant idea! I could evade his wrath all together.

Grace caught the spark of hope in my eyes and put it out. "It'll break him. He won't know where he went wrong. Please, Ana, don't."

But my own heart was already shattered into smithereens, conceding to the idea that Christian would never want this child. I was too far along now to get an abortion. It would be too cruel. "I don't want to abort our baby, Grace."

"But even if you do, your marriage would never be the same." I had been running the past few days, running from everything. But right now, with Grace, I had finally hit a brick wall. There was no escape. I had to face this.

"Why doesn't Christian want children?" I whimpered, my mind willing my husband to desire children as much as I did right now. Maybe if he did, he would accept me.

"Why on earth do you think he would accept this child?" She was disturbed by my thought. It only broke my heart even more. "Ana, I'm sorry, but you have no right to expect Christian to accept your child."

"Please stop calling it my child." I wailed, close to sobbing already. "It takes two to conceive a child."

Grace sighed. "Where's Sawyer?"

"Right here, ma'am." Luke stepped out from the wings, evidently, he had been listening in.

"How could you do this to Christian? He's your boss." She accused. "He was the one to marry Ana, not you."

Remorse wrecked Luke and his eyes dropped to the floor. I knew how much it tormented him to keep things from Christian. I was so sorry for trapping him like this. "Yes ma'am, I should've told him."

"You should go in there and tell him together," Grace suggested, "you put the child in her so you can't expect to walk away while Ana deals with this all."

Luke's eyebrows furrowed the same moment mine did. We both turned very slowly to stare at Grace. Did she just say that Luke had put this child in me? It must have been because Luke was just as traumatized as I was.

Suddenly, I realized why she must have thought this way. Today. Today. Dammit. I know what it must have looked like. Grace must have thought Luke and I went to check if I was pregnant and was devastated that I was. Oh my. What an immensely huge misunderstanding.

Taking my mother's hand in mine gently, her eyes flicked over to mine once more. "Grace, this isn't Luke's child."

"What?" She was clearly in distress and confusion. "Whose is it then?"

"Grace." I sucked in a huge breath. "It's Christian's."

"Christian?" I sat quietly while she registered it, her brain clicking and her eyes the windows to her very confused inner self. "This is your child? You and Christian's?"

"It's certainly not Luke's." I laughed at the absurdity of the situation. "Luke, I'm sorry, please." I waved Luke away. "Go and rest, I'll deal with my poor mother."

All of a sudden, Grace's arms were around me as she locked me in the tightest embrace ever. "Oh Ana!" She chimed, joy in her voice. "I'm so sorry… I just assumed!"

I wrapped my arms around her too, "It's alright! I'm sorry I didn't clarify earlier."

She pulled back, tears glistening in her eyes. "But you looked so tortured this afternoon, I was ascertain it was an unwanted child."

I smiled sadly at her, "Because he is."

Grace looked taken aback, "What? But he's Christian's child and not Luke's. "

"Exactly because he's Christian's, mom." I fell back into my gloomy and downcast mood, sighing loudly. "Christian doesn't want a child."

"Oh my sweet girl, he told you that?" Grace pitied me as she stroked my hair. I nodded. "But having a child growing in you now, sweet girl, it will change things."

"It will?" Skepticism tainted my voice.

Grace nodded, "He loves you like crazy, Ana. I don't think a child will change that. I actually think it will amplify his love."

That planted the seed of hope within me. The seed beginning to sprout under Grace's words. Maybe she was right. I was over thinking this. Christian would love this child because he loves me.

"You've just got to tell him, dear." Grace pushed, but she enveloped me into an embrace once more. "I'm so happy for the both of you."

The wooden door clicked open and I knew my man was in the room. "Is everything alright?"

Grace and I pulled apart gently. "Of course, Christian, your wife is perfectly alright."

We were both rewarded with a megawatt smile, Christian's happy was too loud. "That's great news."

"There'll be even greater news." Grace whispered at me with a smile.

"What was that?" Christian asked, coming closer with the phone in his hand.

Grace shook her head at Christian, "Just saying goodbye to my daughter." She rose to her feet and gave Christian a hug. "Take care of her."

"You're leaving already?" There was sadness in his voice, a little boy's desire for his mother's company.

Grace nodded. "I've got to get back to Carrick, we were supposed to have dinner." She turned to point at the clock, "Look at the time!"

"Tell dad I say hi." Christian smiled sweetly, beginning to walk his mother to the lift.

_It's time. My inner goddess' voice rang softly in my head. _

I can do this. I will do this. I found the courage and strength within myself to stand up. Placing my hand against my belly, I prepared myself for Christian's return. Christian footsteps echoed through the house. "Hey baby, I'll need to run down to the office for a bit."

"Wait, there's something I need to tell you." My voice was shaky, but building in confidence.

Christian walked towards me, touching me lovingly. "Of course, what is it?"

It was now or never. "I'm pregnant."

Time seemed to stop there and then. It was like watching a movie. There was absolute shock in his eyes followed by the confusion. The confusion evolved into worry and then sparked into anger. That emotion caught me off guard for a moment but it quickly dissolved into calm.

Christian took both my hands in his, "That's great news, Ana."

"Really?" I squeaked, uncertain if there were more emotions to come.

A smile spread across his face, "Of course."

"You're not mad?" I was shocked, none of these reactions had been what I had anticipated.

Christian's hand came to cradle my face, "My beautiful Ana, I would never be mad at you."

I stared into his alluring grey eyes, embarrassed that I had ever doubted my husband for one minute. The worst was over, Christian had accepted me for who I was and who I was carrying. All my worries had been for nothing, Christian really did love me.

Returning his glorious smile, I whispered, "I love you."

**All I need; Within Temptation**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Tempest

**Author's Note!**

**Hello everybody. Okay, so I'm probably going to become inconsistent with postings because of academic commitments. It's a crazy upcoming two months for me, so I apologize in advance. Please remember to review and favourite, I really do appreciate it. Suggestions are welcome too!**

There was a loud bang and crash. I jolted up in my sleep, frightened. My breathing race as I searched the bed for Christian, my fingers came up empty. The room was cold and I felt too lonely. Had he not come back from work yet? I must have fallen asleep while waiting.

Something outside shattered, sending the creeps up my spine. I felt like a sitting duck, waiting for whomever it was to come and hunt me down. The blood was pounding in my ears. My mind making a very short mental list of people who would want my life. I had barely any social interaction to make any enemies.

_You're not alone, sissy. My inner goddess rolled her eyes at my insecurities. You have two trained bodyguards on the watch. _

At the thought of Luke and Taylor, the tempest within me stilled ever so slightly. My life was definitely safe in their hands. I was now more interested in where Christian was. Reaching for my phone, I saw the lights switch on outside and knew that the men were on it.

There was nothing. Christian has not bothered to call or even text. Maybe he was in the home office working. Where was he?

Swinging my legs off the bed, I stumbled out and loomed towards the door. There was groaning coming from behind the door. If there was a threat, I was sure the men had taken care of it already. Gently, I opened the door and peeked out. I could see Luke and Taylor towering over Christian who was on the couch.

So there he was. I let myself out and strode towards my husband. Taylor had his hands against his waist and when he saw me, he shook his head and tapped Luke. "Ana, please go back to bed."

Luke was alerted of my arrival as well, "No no, Ana. Back."

"What is it?" Why did they not want me to be with Christian?

"Aaaanaaaaaa?" He slurred.

What the hell. I narrowed my eyes and glared at both the men. Luke put both his hands in the air in surrender, "Too late now."

I took a closer look at Christian. His face was redder than maroon and his attire was rumpled and reeking of beer. When his eyes opened, the grey was lined with a ring of red. The anger within me rose visibly in my cheeks. I clenched my jaw.

"Ana, we'll deal with it. Please." Taylor begged.

There was more. I turned to stare at him, scrutinizing his flustered expression. He was hiding something from me. "Oh Ana," I heard the seductive twist in her voice before I actually saw her, "I'll take care of Christian."

Balling up my fists, I spun around to find Elena coming towards us with a glass of water in hand. "Go back to sleep, darling." She said with a pinch of arrogance, "Christian came to me for a reason."

Betrayal stung hard. He came to her? "GET THE F*** OUT OF MY HOME." I hollered. I would deal with Christian tomorrow, but right now, I had a bitch to throw out of my apartment.

The troll was dressed in a short and tight black dress that clung to her shapely body. Right now, I did not want to even think of what they had done together and where they had been. The sight of someone who had gone to such lengths for Christian and tortured his innocent mind needed to leave.

Luke took action, quickly coming to grab Elena's elbow and asking her to leave as well. Taylor put a palm out in front of me, trying to prevent me from pouncing and tearing her bone from bone. "Get your filthy hands off me!" Elena pushed Luke away as hard as she could.

_Weakling. My inner goddess rolled her eyes once more._

"GET OUT OR I WILL KILL YOU!" I arrowed my index finger at her, wishing I had a knife to be more threatening.

"Nooooo." Christian spoke, his eyes blinking uncoordinatedly. We all rotated to look at him. He pointed a crooked finger at Elena, "Ssssss-tay."

"You're fu*king kidding me right now." I spat, folding my arms across my chest.

Betrayal. Elena released a sickening laughter. That was the last straw. "GET THE FU** OUT!" I yelled, seeing red.

"Okay okay." Luke was irritated; his tolerance level had already been reached. He took the cup out of Elena's hand and put it on the table. "Get the fu** out of here." Before she could protest, Luke grabbed the lady like she was a sack of rubbish and hauled her out of the place.

It gave me much joy to watch Luke handle her roughly. But now it was time to deal with my asshole of a husband. Had he forgotten how Elena Robinson had tried to screw his company over just to get him back to her?

_At least it's not Leila he brought home. My inner goddess rubbed in my face, casually throwing salt into my open wound. _

Speaking of Leila, I had let go of his infidelity with her and even married him. But here he was, walking all over my trust in him by bringing back the one woman I hated to the core. It made me furious just thinking about her. Both of the hers.

It had taken me so long to accept him once more. But Christian had just taken my heart and ripped it out, proceeding to stab it before throwing it down four stories. Right in this moment, I questioned whether having this hold was the right thing to do.

The fact that Christian had pretended to be happy about our baby and then revealed his true emotions to a bitch. It reflected that he could not trust me, proved to me that I should not trust him either.

"Mrs. Grey..." Taylor called me. Right now, I did not feel like a Mrs. Grey at all. "What should we do?"

I contemplated just dumping him here and going back to sleep. But Christian was in need of my help. He had passed out drunk against the couch. Sighing, I let the part of me that loved Christian shine. Unfortunately, majority of me loved Christian.

"Could you help me get him into the bedroom?" I placed my hand against my headache, rubbing myself.

"Of course." Taylor muttered, equally upset with Christian. He began to prop Christian against his arm, trying to drag him.

I tried to help but Luke beat me to it, coming to my rescue. The two men shuffled with Christian in between. It was rather difficult as Christian was swinging from side to side, mumbling in his drunkenness about Elena's absence of all things.

It pained me to listen. Taylor and Luke plonked Christian down face first on the bed. I bit my lip, wondering where to go from here. I was not just referring to this situation. Our relationship was on the line.

Luke stepped forward and pulled me into a tight embrace, his hand stroking the soft of my back. "Don't, Ana." He said, "He's just trying to deal with it, give him some time."

I sighed into his shoulder. If only Christian could give me the same support that Luke did and was giving me. "Thanks, Luke."

"Do you need anything else?" He asked nicely, beginning to step back and release me.

I did not even have to think. "Just keep that bitch out of Escala."

Luke managed to make me smile by pulling a salute, "Yes ma'am!"

"Goodnight you two." I laughed. Taylor looked at war with himself as he and Luke left my room.

Luke lingered at the door, one hand on the handle. He gave me a sympathetic smile, "Give him some time, Ana." I nodded at Luke but deep inside, I knew that his meeting with Elena tonight had snapped me. "Goodnight." Luke whispered, shutting the door.

I stood there in the cold hard silence, watching Christian who was on his belly sleep. It hurt me to know that he did this to himself because of our baby. It really did hurt. The first of my tears slipped down my cheek before I realized it.

I dampened a face towel in the toilet and came back to Christian. He had flipped over belly up so I began dabbing his forehead with the towel, cleaning my husband up. He groaned softly. My tears fell onto his bare chest as I helped him take his shirt off, unbuttoning each and every one.

Very gently, I stroked his chest with the towel. Christian's face was the epitome of peace and I found a quiet satisfaction knowing that we had come this far. Next, I did his arms, realizing that there was a stench of alcohol.

Removing his pants, my hand hit into something hard. I fished out his keys and his phone. Sighing, I was about to put his phone down when the screen flashed white. It was Elena, of course. I knew it was against all ethics and mannerisms, but at the moment, I did not give a shit.

It did not take me a long time to crack his iPhone code. I unlocked Christian's phone with "ANAS". My joy at his use of my name was short lived by his conversation with Elena. Christian had been the first to reach out to her.

**11.08 : Need you now. **

**11.11 : It's good to hear from you, where are you? **

They must have switched to phoning each other because the next text was the one that had recently come in. It was from Elena.

**3.48 : Darling, your petty little wife chased me out of the apartment. Sorry I couldn't spend the night with you. You have to tell that wife of yours that you're not ready for children. It's the only way. Hope to see you soon. **

My blood was boiling, ready to turn into steam and about to condense. Bloody hell. I found the tolerance to put the phone back down on the table but not before sending myself a screenshot of their conversation.

Returning to my duties as a wife while Christian had failed his, I stripped him of his pants and folded it. Standing there idly, I watched my husband soundly asleep. I sighed and wiped away my tears, knowing that I had married a mercurial man. With much difficulty, I helped to tuck him into bed.

Knowing that there was no way my heart could take sleeping beside him tonight, I slipped out of the bedroom and closed the door behind me. There was nothing I could or would say when those grey eyes opened in the morning. I needed some space away from my husband.

Yet, I knew that nobody would forgive me I decided to leave Escala. Christian would go shit bat crazy, with no doubt. Luke would erupt like a volcano that had been dormant for far too long and now that we had Grace on board, I was sure she would do anything to keep this baby safe. Even if it meant sedating me.

Thinking of Grace, I was suddenly craving for my mother's arms around me. Just like Christian, I needed my mother some times too. In addition, I knew she would be over the moon about the news. Maybe even Ray would partake in the joyous occasion.

Escala was pitch black dark now, but I was familiar with my surroundings and knew the orientation by heart. I could sleep on the couch, but I did not want to be found. My mind flew to the playroom, but I had no idea where the keys were. Christian and I had not been in there ever again and I was starting to wonder if maybe it was demolished already.

I found myself in Christian's office. In the moonlight, I walked by his shelves of files, books and framed photographs. There were some documenting his growth from high school to now. Graduation photos after graduation photos.

Christian had not changed much, his features merely sharpening over the years. Then there was the one of Christian and I at my graduation. I picked it off the shelf and examined us, trying to recall the emotions I had that day. It seemed too long ago.

Wallowing in the self-pity that I was, I sat behind Christian's desk and thought of all the decisions that he had made here. Some of them concerning me. I knew my file was around here somewhere, back in Christian's stalker days.

My bare feet scraped across the fluffy carpet. I had an idea. Lowering myself to the carpet, I lay my head against it and cradled the frame in my arms. My eyes began to droop as I floated off into a dimension where I felt loved, with child or not.

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	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: On the rocks

**Author's Note!**

**Alright, here's another chapter I managed to squeeze out. Please do follow and review if you like (: It really does help me to decide what to do with this story! ENJOYYYYYYY.**

There were fluffy clouds in the sky. Lying back against the soft green grass, I looked up at them and relaxed. The cool breeze brushed against my cheekbones, caressing them and planting a trail of soft kisses.

"Mommy, what is that?" An inquisitive cheery voice resounded from beside me.

I turned to look at my little grey-eyed toddler his locks the same shade as mine. He was exceptionally beautiful and I loved him so. We looked at the cloud once more together. "I think it's an elephant." I said, preparing to point out where I thought the trunk was.

His little eyes filled with enlightenment but not at my words, "No mommy, it's a pirate ship."

"ANAAAAA!" A panicked voice hollered.

Sitting up, I grabbed my child and hid him behind my back. "Stay down!" I whispered. Christian came to view, climbing up the hill towards us.

"ANASTASIA!" He shouted once more, his tone more worried than before.

My eyes fluttered open to the early morning light. I turned my head to the side and saw the office door thrown open. "WHERE IS SHE!" Christian's boomed, then left the room. My secret hiding spot did the trick.

Now I would have to deal with one of Christian's crazy little tempers. I slowly began to sit up, aware of the ache in my neck from sleeping on the floor. It hurt a little and I stretched it out to the tune of my name on Christian's tongue. He was throwing one of his tantrums again, pulling in innocent bystanders to solve his self-induced problems.

Standing, the bones in my kneecap made a cracking sound. I was paying for my lame act of defiance; leaving my husband in an empty bed. I made my way towards the open door slightly.

Christian had his head tucked into his palms, his eyes cast downward. Taylor stood by him, with a rather shaken Gail bringing him a cup of what looked like tea. "Where is Ana?" He groaned.

Taylor's eyes shuffled to Gail and the back again to Christian, "Mr. Grey, we last saw her helping you into bed last night."

"She came to the bar?" Christian's head whipped up, his eyes a faded red.

Confusion spread through all of us except Christian. Gail raised her eyebrows and gestured for Taylor to say something. Clearing his throat, Taylor decided to probe. "Sir, what do you remember?"

Christian pressed his palms against the temples of his forehead, "I last remember drinking at the bar after work... Ana must have taken me home... She must be angry..." He grunted in frustration.

Christian thought I was angry over his drinking? Probably. I was mad because he pretended that everything was alright but then decided to take it all out on his own body. A crazy part of me still longed to care for him, even in this moment of utter betrayal.

"Mr. Grey, Mrs. Grey was home all night." Taylor hated to be the one to break the news to Christian.

"What?" He groaned, lifting his head slightly to meet Taylor's gaze.

Taylor shifted uncomfortably, "Mrs Lincoln took you home."

The moment was suspended in time. I observed as Christian took the time to digest what had just been revealed to him. Instantly, his face turned red at the thought and he pounced up to his feet. "THAT CRAZY BITCH!" He clenched his fists and held them at his sides, shaking with fury.

"Mr. Grey!" Luke came bounding down the stairs, rushing to restrain Christian's anger.

Did he just call you a bitch? My inner goddess hissed.

"THAT CRAZY BITCH MUST HAVE FOLLOWED ME TO THE BAR AND SLIPPED SOMETHING IN MY DRINK."'Christian let out a tortured sound as he smashed his head against his palms.

"Mr Grey!" All three of the staff yelled, reaching forward to pull him away from hurting himself.

The strings in my heart tugged as a million new questions blossomed. Had Christian not sought out Elena? Then why would his phone show those texts? Did he know I was here and lying to trick me into trusting him? My head was spinning.

"Where is my angel?" Christian whimpered like a puppy with a broken paw, he turned to look at Luke. "Have you searched the cameras?"

Luke nodded, stuffing his hands in his pockets. I recognized this move. He was giving me the time and opportunity to reveal myself. Of course he had spotted me on the tapes. Luke knew best that I had learned my lesson, I was never going to run ever again.

Finding strength in the knowledge that I was not the one in the wrong here, I stepped out of the office with my head held high. Luke's lips pulled up at a corner, proud of my bravery.

"Luke," I emphasized on his first name, "Would you please take me to work in 10 minutes?"

Christian spun on his feet, his eyes wide with shock. Behind his back, Luke smirked at my boldness, "Of course, Ana. Take your time." Gail and Taylor let out a sigh in relief upon my appearance.

"I'll get your breakfast, Mrs Grey." Gail smiled sweetly and knowingly. "You'll have to eat well from now on."

I nodded at her, going soft at her care and concern for her baby. Christian stood rooted in his place as I strolled past him and towards our bedroom.

"Ana." His feathers were all ruffled. "Where were you?"

Knowing that he deserved nothing more, I ignored him and walked into our bedroom. Hearing his footsteps approaching, I quickly locked the door behind me. Stripping down,Christian banged loudly and called my name, I cleaned up in silence.

To the tune of his shouting, I searched my closet for something to wear. Very soon, I would no longer be able to wear tight dresses and short dresses. Hence, I tugged out a tight and short red dress that would barely cover anything. Preparing for war, I painted on my make up and paid extra care to make myself shine.

"ANA CAN WE TALK?"

Of course we will, Grey. I rolled my eyes and slipped on my highest red heels. We will talk and I will win. I shrugged on my black blazer and did my hair up in a top knot. Lifting my Chanel office bag, I stole a glance in the mirror. Christian was going to get the worst punishment in the world, catered to torture him.

A drop dead sexy wife who he could only see but could not touch. Not to mention, it was drive him bat shit crazy knowing that his wife's upper thighs and cleavage was on display for the world to see. Punishment and revenge is best served cold.

Sucking in a deep breath to steady myself, I unlocked and then pulled the door open. Christian had his jaws clenched, his entire body tensed. Checking me out, my poor husband's eyebrows furrowed in displeasure. Ignoring his existence, I strode right past him.

Luke let out a low whistle as I approached. Taylor punched him in the arm and shook his head at him in disapproval. Awarding him with a beam, I threw my legs forward with a kind of feistiness.

Gail handed over my lunchbox to Luke, "Have a good day, Mrs Grey." Christian stumbled out to the kitchen as well.

"Thank you, Gail!" I chimed. "Shall we go?"

"Ana, we need to talk about last night." Christian stated, not thrilled about my behavior. Luke began to walk away and I followed after him. "Ana." He growled, trailing after.

Luke held the lift door open for me with his lips pressed into a stiff line. I gave him a shrug. "ANASTASIA ROSE STEELE!" Christian practically barked.

_Oh, he just screamed at you. My inner goddess was like a student getting another student in trouble with the teacher. _

I swiveled in place and put on the most nonchalant expression I could. "You look horrible!" He really did, all bothered and red accompanied with his lack of sleep. Christian's face softened when he thought I was about to show him concern. "Why don't you ring Elena to clean you up." I sneered, stepping back into the lift and letting it close.

Luke's chuckle bounced off the lift walls as we descended, "You really are staying to fight this one, aren't you?"

I gave him a smug look and shrugged, "A wise man once said all I ever did was run."

Luke nodded, "That man is very wise indeed." He chortled. "And I like this new Ana."

"You're the only one who does." The doors opened and he guided me to the car.

"So, pregnant lady." Luke said with a toothy grin as he got behind the wheel, "Let's go somewhere awesome for breakfast."

I lifted my lunch box. "And I have work."

Luke gesticulated at the clock in the car. It read 6.30AM. I had completely let my anger drive me out of Escala, not even bothering to catch the time. "We have two and a half hours to kill."

" Don't worry about it, I know just the place to lighten your mood." The promise ringed in his voice and we exchanged smiles.

Time spent with Luke had been getting better and deeper. We had completely bypassed the social boundary that came with professionalism. Luke was more of a friend and confidante than a bodyguard. Most of the time, I would forget that he was my guard.

"Table for two?" The charming waiter lifted two menus as he saw us approaching.

I had never been here before. The entire cafe was dressed in wood, smelling of Christmas in all the right ways. It exuded the feeling of home portrayed in the movies, the furniture those in Christian's reading room. Huge red velvet chairs around antique gold coffee tables. I soon found myself nestled into one.

"Luke, I never knew you had this in you." I was breathless, my eyes still trying to absorb the whole scene. It was beyond gorgeous.

He gave me a courteous laugh, "Wait till you try the food."

Thankfully, Luke had ordered for the both of us. I was glad that he did, I would not have known what to order. He had gotten the basics of scrambled eggs and sausages and the classier truffle fries paired with ice cream topped waffles.

My stomach grumbled in response. "There there," I patted the child growing within me, "Junior likes Uncle Luke already."

The look that Luke gave me was charged, staring lovingly at my interaction with the child. "Have you thought of a name yet?"

I stroked my tummy and shook my head, "With his dad all over other women and against him, I don't want to..." I picked at my food. "Grow too emotionally attached to him."

In a clear attempt to lighten the mood, Luke pushed the tray of fries to me and laughed. "Well, you've definitely seem to have determined the baby's gender already!"

That was true. "I guess I've always imagined my first child being a boy." I took a bite of the sausage and it exploded in my mouth. The taste of lamb and rosemary dancing across my palette.

"First child, eh?" Luke munched on his waffle. "Thinking about having more?"

I nodded in excitement, "I love children!"

"Yeah, I do too." Luke chimed, the food making his smile thicker than normal.

I smiled at him. "The baby deserves a father like you, Luke." I told him in utmost honesty. "Neither I nor the baby deserves to be treated the way Christian is treating us."

The painful memory of Christian returning home with Elena and asking her to stay jolted my heart, shooting an arrow right through the core. I clenched my jaw and warded off the tears. I had to be strong.

He pursed his lips and nipped at his Nutella milkshake. "Unfortunately, I agree. I know it's out of my place to tell you these things, but a child is a gift. Every child is. It's a mother's responsibility to bring that gift safely to the world." I observed as he got lost in the moment, drifting into his happy place. "So I thank you for choosing to keep the child."

"No, thank you." I reached for his hand across the table and clasped it. It alarmed Luke for a moment but then he relaxed. "Thank you for being so supportive."

Luke was about to say something when the phone in his pocket rang. He withdrew his hand from mine and reached for it. Briefly, he flashed me Christian's face. "Good morning, sir."

Trying to distract myself, I made progress with the food. The truffle oil was aromatic and I wished I could swim in it all day.

"Yes, Mr. Grey." He covered the microphone. "He'd like to talk to you."

I rolled my eyes. I put my hand out for the phone and he placed it there. Injecting the most lethal poison into my voice as I could, I taunted him. "Not Mrs Lincoln speaking."

Christian breathed heavily through his nose, taking some time to calm himself down before answering. "Anastasia," His voice leveled out while saying my name. "I don't like how we left it this morning."

"Neither do I, but you don't see me whining about it to my ex lover." I snapped, perpetually annoyed.

"Look, I honestly don't know how Elena came into the picture. If I was sober, I would have never met her."

"But you weren't sober and you did meet her. GOD KNOWS WHAT THE TWO OF YOU DID." I lowered my voice as the other customers threw irritated glances my way. "In fact, you brought the monster home."

"Elena and I-" He started.

There was no manners in me to prevent me from lashing out, "Which even begs the question to why you were drunk in the first place. You deceived me into thinking that you wanted and loved this child too!"

"Ana? Can we continue this conversation face to face? I need to see you." He sounded so sad and it tugged at my heart strings.

No, Ana. My inner goddess shook her head at me disapprovingly. Focus.

"I have work and so do you." I said, matter-of-factly. Seeing Christian could have two possible outcomes. One, I would be so pissed that I would scream at him for hours. Two, I would break down on my knees and take him back.

"Ana, I know for a matter of fact that work doesn't start for you until another hour and in my case, I don't have to go for work at all. Where are you, anyway?"

I narrowed my eyes. There was no way I was giving into him this time. "What makes you think I'd want to spend time with a deceitful husband when I could be spending it with my pillar of support through times of need?!"

Luke's eyes widened and he shook his hands at me. "Don't!" He hissed under his breath. Don't wake the sleeping tiger, eh?

"LUKE SAWYER!" He blasted over the phone, loud enough for Luke to hear.

"He's been a better husband than you are!" I snapped in his defense.

Luke sighed and snatched the phone from me as if I was a child that needed to be punished. He kept it against at a distant from his ear. "Mr. Grey."

He blinked as we both listened to the string of profanities Christian had to share. "We're at a cafe having breakfast."

"Which?!" Christian screeched. "Your duties are to take MRS. GREY to work and not for breakfast!"

I clenched my jaw and grabbed the phone back. "FU** YOU, GREY." I hollered and pressed the end call button.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Manic Monday

"Ana, that was mighty irresponsible of you." Luke scolded, not bothering to conceal his annoyance. "Next time you decide to throw my name out there to make him jealous, think about my job."

I watched guiltily as he kept his phone back in his pocket. He was right. I wanted to make Christian pay, to feel this tinge of bitterness and hurt that I was drowning in. Maybe that way he would realize how his actions were tormenting me and start treating me like his wife.

"You're not the only victim, Ana." Luke shook his head at me as he drank his water. "You took me to that doctor's appointment, you left him in bed and you just battered his attempt at reconciliation to the ground." Before I could say anything, Luke put his palm up to signal for me to wait. "Remember, it all started when you didn't take your shot."

"You're switching sides?" I narrowed my eyes, prepared for the betrayal.

Luke sighed in exasperation, "How can you see it that way? Christian and you are married! There aren't supposed to be sides." His eyebrows crinkled as he squished them together in frustration. "Why don't you get that?"

My face slipped into a subconscious pout as I glared down at the food that had been delicious. As much as I wanted to reject Luke's words, they were all true. Even though I had found fault with Christian's behavior, it had all begun because of my irresponsible behavior. I had been caught up in the moment in my anger at Christian.

"Ana, where do you see this ending if you keep fighting him?" Luke lured me out of my thoughts as he signed the bill. "Because I only see this ending in an ugly divorce."

Divorce. My head hung low. Did I want a divorce? I loved Christian. I love him and I could only ever see myself with him. Where would a divorce leave me? I'd have a beautiful child but not the love of my life to raise our child together.

I would be alone.

What was I supposed to do? Move on and forget his little thing with Elena? I did not even know what they had done together. What if it was something... Along the lines of Leila?

"Quit brooding, sweetheart." Luke reached forward and squeezed my wrist. "You don't know anything until he explains. So give him a chance."

I shot him a halfhearted smile and shrugged, suddenly not feeling like going to work. But the responsible adult in me told me different. Luke walked me to the car and began to drive, we would arrive just on time for work.

My mind was spinning around Christian, wondering what he was doing by now. Surely, he was pissed beyond

"Good morning, Mrs Grey!" Giselle and Charlotte sang together as I stepped into the lobby.

"Morning, ladies." I nodded at them.

Giselle turned around and placed a huge bouquet of flowers onto the counter, flashing me a huge smile. "These just arrived for you."

There was an assortment of flowers, littered mostly with baby breath. Red roses, yellow tulips, white daisies... It was breathtaking. "They must be from Mr Grey!" Charlotte said with a playful wink.

The two ladies giggled together at the thought. "You are so lucky!" Charlotte chimed, cradling the flowers to her chest and hesitantly passing them to me.

Luke judged me with a proud smirk. Defending his boss had been the right card to play. I felt my heart melt the moment I smelled the alluring scent of the flowers. Christian really did know how to apologize. It vaguely reminded me of the many bouquet of flowers he had placed at the foot of my apartment once.

"Thanks, ladies." I beamed, barely able to clutch the bouquet as I headed for the lifts.

"I would say expect an arrival from Christian in a few hours," Luke laughed as he held the door open for me. "Taylor says he's clearing some documents before coming over."

I nodded at him, my heart pounding at the thought of seeing Christian after what I had done to him this morning. The angst and anger would be translated into brilliant and glorious sexual intercourse.

"Be sure to do more than kiss and make up, Ana." Luke winked as the doors closed on him.

I stepped back and leaned into the mirror, letting out a gleeful sigh. Christian did love me and the flowers testified that fact. Instead of shutting him out, we needed to have a talk about us. Just like Grace had said, we most probably would end up loving each other even more with this child.

Placing the bouquet down on my desk I reached to pull out the card that was buried under the flowers. It was an adorable card with a cartoon of a baby. That was so sweet. If he kept this up, my resistance would disintegrate before I even met him.

With my head in the clouds, I read the message behind the card. It was not in his handwriting... Maybe it was his assistant that had done the card. "Congratulations on baby Grey, too bad I'll soon be sending my condolences on his abortion. -Elena Lincoln."

My blood was seething and I saw red. What the flying f***. I slammed the flowers upon the floor and stomped on them angrily. I had spent the past hour convincing myself that Christian and Elena were nothing but this has just destroyed all efforts.

There was a throbbing in my head. I pressed my palm against to soothe it but the dizziness hit me and I fell against my table, gripping the top for support. This was all too overwhelming.

As if it would solve anything, I yanked off the huge ass wedding ring from my finger and chucked it into a pocket of my dress. Patting it down, I took in a deep breath to steady myself.

My finger felt free and so did I. "Mrs Grey?" Claire's worries voice peeked into the room as she did. "Are you alright?" Her eyes shuffled to the mess on the floor. "What happened?"

"Yeah... Just a little dizzy." I replied, hobbling towards my desk as white spots covered my vision.

"Sit down, Mrs Grey. I'll get you some water. "

Clenching my jaw, I tried to calm myself down. My phone began to vibrate against my thigh and I lifted it out, expecting to see Christian but instead..."Hey, Ethan!"

"Hey, Ana..." Ethan's voice sounded heavy and uncomfortable. "You don't sound too good, love."

I hated how Ethan knew how I truly felt even when I masked it so well. Dropping the act, I sighed and rubbed my temples, "Yeah, something happened with Christian."

There was a tense silence. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I was thinking about it and I pretty much almost fainted so... I doubt that's a good idea." I tried to laugh it off.

"That doesn't sound too good, where are you?" Ethan was in no mood for jokes.

"My office." Claire came back with a glass of water, placing it on the table and excusing herself.

"I'll come to you."

"What, now?" I squeaked, barely even understanding this urgency. Was my dizzy spell that dangerous?

"Or would you prefer to come to me?" His voice softened.

I smiled at that thought. It had been a long time since Ethan and I had had a hang out day just the both of us. It was usually in a setting with many people and Christian, who would keep me in tow at all times when Ethan was in the premise. "That sounds good, this office sucks."

Ethan cracked a laugh. "I'll take you out for lunch. Pick you at 11?"

"Sounds perfect." I beamed into the air. "I'll see you then."

"Don't get into any trouble until then, love." Ethan warned teasingly with a tinge of seriousness.

"You're a worse nagger than my mother!" I scolded. "Bye." I said and we both hung up together.

Claire lingered at the door with her PDA in hand. "Mrs Grey, should I schedule a doctor's appointment for you today?"

I raised my eyebrows at my overly concerned assistant, "Oh, that won't be necessary. I didn't sleep well last night."

"Alright." She nodded. "Can I get the janitor to clear the flowers?"

"Yes, definitely." I brushed the flowers aside dismissively, it smelt foul to me now. "Right away please."

Claire snapped her fingers and two old men strolled into my office, beginning to dump the crumpled bouquet into a plastic bag. They took a while to clear the loose petals and I felt apologetic for causing such a mess.

"Mr. Grey has been informed about your dizziness." She stated, tapping into her PDA.

"What?" My heart pounded against my chest. "When?"

She looked lost and worried, as if she had done something wrong. "I'm sorry... I..."

I worked a retrieving my calm and lowered my tone, "It's alright... Did he call?"

Claire shook her head, "Taylor called to check if you were in yet and he asked if you were okay... So I told him you were dizzy... I'm sorry, Mrs Grey."

Of course it was not her fault. Christian had instructed Claire to inform him of every detail, no matter how minor, ever since I had employed her. She was pretty much my nanny. "It's alright, Claire." I smiled reassuringly at her.

The two men were finally done. "Wait!" I said, lifting the card from my table and chucking it into the bag. "Thank you."

I redirected my attention to Claire, "Claire, could you shift any appointments from 11-1 to another time or day?" I leaned back onto my table as she tapped the PDA.

"Done." She looked up.

"Don't tell Mr Grey, please." I pleaded slightly. She panicked slightly. "If he asks, just tell him I have meetings." She nodded, guilty of a lie she has yet to tell. "If he tries to come up, do tell him that I am busy in meetings."

Claire relaxed a little, "Of course, Mrs. Grey." Just then, someone called her name and she turned for a moment before looking back at me. "Your first meeting partners have just arrived."

Throughout the meeting, I received various text messages from none other than Christian Grey himself.

**9.10AM : Hey baby, I wanted to call when I heard about your dizzy spells but then you went straight into a meeting. Just know that if you're unwell just come back home. I love you, drink water and rest well. Laters, baby. **

**9.15AM: I intended to come over but I'm perpetually swarmed with work. You know what I say... If you want a job well done you have to do it yourself. Thinking of you. **

**9.30AM: Okay, Ana. We really need to talk. I hate feeling that you're suffering because of my reaction to our latest predicament.**

That text made me laugh in a twisted way. He had referred to the Elena baby combo as a predicament. Christian Grey had yet to find out about the bouquet of flowers his lover had given me this morning.

**10.15AM: I wanted to have lunch with you, but Claire says the only available time would be at 4. Are you having lunch at all? Taylor says you have to eat for obvious reasons.**

So Christian was dealing with the baby by completely bypassing the word itself. How mature. But Taylor of course, who had experience raising Sophie, was inputting much needed knowledge well above his job description.

**10.32: It kinda sucks that I'm having a one-way conversation here. I know for a fact you've read my messages because you left your time stamp on.**

Growling under my breath as the second group of clients presented their proposal, I changed my iPhone settings.

**10.47: Oh, that's hilarious Mrs Grey. I have Welch, if you have let that slip your mind. I could just turn on your office cameras from my laptop. This Cold War will not last. **

"Thank you." I said, rising to shake their hands.

"Always great doing business with you, Mrs Grey."

"Claire will show you both out."

I took the opportunity to reply.

**10.58: Mr Grey, I will be having lunch but not with you. This is the current predicament. Please assure Taylor, who is probably the only one worried for OUR child's safety, that I will grab lunch in between breaks. Your Mrs Lincoln delivered a beautiful bouquet of flowers to my office today. Glad to see that you share similar sentiments with your lover over our predicament. See you when and if I do. **

The moment I pressed send on my phone, Ethan called. "Love, I'm downstairs with two giggly women."

I laughed into the phone as I made my way out. "That's Charlotte and Giselle, feel free to hit on them. I am on my way down!"


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: Patchwork

**Author's Note! **

**I am SEVENTEEN for goodness sakes. I'm not here to publish my story or please my readers. I'm here to share my ideas and stories. Don't thrash fanfics because they're exactly that! Fanfics. If you want great stories with professional standards, go to the bookstore. Firstly, Ana is pregnant and hormonal, she isn't thinking straight and she's over-imagining things. Secondly, she's not running away. She's married, you geniuses. She can't have male friends/confidantes? Geez. **  
**Ps. I really am trying to portray Ana with her pregnancy hormones but I've never been pregnant... So ALL THE MOTHERS IN THE HOUSE PLEASE HELP! (:**

After explaining everything that had happened, I remained silent while Ethan took some time to absorb and understand. Which was alright because the restaurant he had taken me to served the best Clam Chowder and I had been having killer cravings for this. Spooning what was probably my fourth bowl for lunch, I watched Ethan deliberate on what to say. As my good friend of such a long time, I had always come to him for advice. Getting married did not change that.

"Well, Ana." He cleared his throat, not yet looking at me. "How does it make you feel?"

"Feel?" I squeaked, pursing my lips together.

Ethan nodded, "How did you feel when Christian brought Elena back?"

I did not even have to think. Just the mention of those words sparked little fiery red ants through my system, "Really upset." The image of this early morning replayed through my head and I drank more soup to chase it down.

Ethan sighed a little, "Why?"

I looked up at him in confusion. "Isn't it self-explanatory?"

He shook his head and took a bite of his crispy fish, "No. I can only infer on why you're upset but I rather find out properly why you are."

"Because he brought her home, Ethan." I glared at him for making me say it out loud. "The woman who had tried to take him away from me countless of times! I felt so betrayed. And when he asked her to stay in his drunken state, I just felt like my world was crumbling to my feet." I shook my head and pressed my palms against my temple. "Part of me felt as if he had just chosen Elena over me... My heart couldn't take that."

"But Christian has loved you wholeheartedly ever since the day you met him. Why the sudden doubt? Don't you think that's a little irrational?"

"Irrational?" I scoffed.

Tell him. My inner goddess chided at me.

I had missed out the largest detail of this whole drama. What could be argued as the catalyst of this saga. Ethan picked up on my discomfort. Turning on an inquisition similar to his sister's, he probed. "What is it?"

The hardest person to tell was over. "I'm pregnant, Ethan."

It almost made me laugh as Ethan, drinking his water midway, choked and spluttered it all over a nearby plant. He coughed and patted himself while I broke into a fit of giggle. He swallowed and drank another gulp of water to steady himself, "OH MY GOODNESS!"

Ethan jumped to his feet and came to my side, pulling me up into his chest and clasping me to him. "Congratulations, Ana!" He squeezed me and then quickly pulled back, "I'm sorry, was that too much for the baby?"

Excitement bubbled through me just as much as it had in Ethan. The table of onlookers now tuned into our conversation. "Everyone!" Ethan lifted his glass to the restaurant, "She's pregnant!"

I laughed harder as everyone in the restaurant clapped, smiles spreading across their faces and people shouting their congratulations. I beamed into Ethan's overjoyed face, "Ana, you're going to be a mother!"

Lost in the excitement, I hugged him back. At the back of my mind, I could not help but feel that this should have been how Christian reacted. Becoming parents should have been something we were excited about together. We should never have been separated over this matter.

As we sat back down at our table, the waiter brought out a complimentary chocolate cake for us to share. "Wait," Ethan's smile faded, "Is that why..."

I nodded sadly, "He doesn't want the child, Ethan. That's why everything happened."

Clenching his jaw, Ethan looked conflicted as he glared at a spot in the cake. It was as if he was fighting some internal emotions, balling up his fist while in deep thought. By the time I had finished the cake, he was still buried in his mind.

"This changes things." He finally mumbled under his breath.

I raised my eyebrows, "What?"

"You have to tell him, love." Ethan instructed me, his eyes boring into mine. "Tell him what you just told me, word for word."

"I have." I whined.

"Knowing you, I doubt so." Ethan gave me a half smile. "You've got to sit him down and talk things through with Christian. I'm not going to be able to be here for you all the time, Ana. He is and he will." Before I could think of anything to say, Ethan called for the bill. "Christian's the only one who can protect you from Elena."

"Come." Ethan said, taking my hand.

"Where are we going?"

"I'm taking you to Christian, you two have to talk." Ethan stated matter-of-factly.

I halted in my footsteps and jerked him to a stop as well. The fear was crippling. The idea of facing my husband after what had happened over night was daunting. Avoiding Christian was my attempt at keeping us together for as long as possible. An abortion would separate us and so would keeping the baby.

Not relenting, Ethan tugged me forward gently towards the exit. Luke, who had been taking a call outside, joined us in our stride as we headed for Ethan's car. "What's up?"

"Any idea where Christian is?" Ethan asked Luke as he opened the passenger door for me.

Luke nodded, "On his way to Ana's office." As he said this, he turned to judge my expression. Of course, I was petrified. "Claire's PDA is hooked to Christian's iPhone." He explained.

"Perfect." Ethan smiled at us both. "We can resolve this now."

"By feeding me to the shark?" I groaned, crossing my arms and refusing to budge.

"Since when is she so melodramatic?" Ethan hissed at Luke.

Luke chortled and sniggered, pretending to be telling Ethan a secret by covering his mouth slightly with his palm. "It's the pregnant hormones." Both men tumbled in laughter at my predicament.

I narrowed my eyes at them, "I can hear you."

"Come on love, climb in." Ethan gestured to the car. "Luke boy here and I are whisking you to your prince where your love for each other will be rekindled." Petulantly, I crossed my arms tighter and shook my head. It irritated Ethan and he took it as a challenge. "If you don't go in on your own accord, I will make you."

Standing at the sidelines watching me getting harassed and not doing a thing about it, Luke leaned against the car door and laughed at me. The world's men were losing their minds. Maybe they should all carry children and then they will become sympathetic towards pregnant mothers.

"I'm counting to three." Ethan threatened, folding his arms as well.

"Stop treating me like a child!" I snapped.

"Then stop acting like one!" Ethan retorted.

"Fine!" With much attitude, I lifted myself into the car.

Ethan shut the door and lingered there for a moment talking to Luke. Whatever he said only made Luke laugh harder. That irritated me and I knocked at the window for them to break it up. Both men turned to me and then split, Luke opening the back door while Ethan made it to the driver's side.

"Ana, I think the only one who can handle your pregnancy hormones is Taylor." Luke pointed out.

"What makes you think I'm having problems controlling my hormones? And what makes you think they're because I'm pregnant?!"

"Pretty much because you're really dramatic right now and you're making things worse than they actually are." Ethan supported Luke. "Oh, and you're pregnant."

"The fact is my husband doesn't want our child, pretended to, came back drunk with a woman I detest and then she gave me flowers for the abortion!" I defended myself, pleading with them to see my case.

Ethan smacked his lips together, "The fact is that you have a very loving husband who made a mistake and a crazy ex girlfriend who is trying to break you both up!"

"And you're letting her win!" Luke piped in from the back.

"Your childish reaction to all of this is going to drive him away for good." Ethan tapped on the steering wheel at the red light.

"I actually think it might be the hormones." Luke whispered. "Taylor warned that they disillusioned his wife."

Ethan gave me a sideway glance of mock fear filled with caution, "Maybe we should keep her sedated." Noticing that I was not entertained one bit, as he pulled up outside my building, he put a gentle hand on my shoulder. "Lighten up, love."

"We. Have. A. Problem." Luke's tone took on a dangerously serious edge.

Ethan and I turned to see what was approaching the car. "Should I stay?"

"Definitely not." Luke said without even looking at Ethan. "Ana, get out of the car now!" Both Luke and I flew out of the car just in time for Ethan to make his getaway.

Ballistic and close to exploding, Christian maintained his facade of calm as he made his loomed towards Luke and I with Taylor in tow. Looking as sexy as usual, my husband was dressed in a personally tailored tuxedo and had his hair in an appealing mess.

"You. Had. Lunch. With. Ethan." Christian gritted his teeth together as he came to halt before me.

My body responded in his close proximity, a myriad of emotions playing each other out. Anger and betrayal came first. "You had a drink with Elena AND took her home."

My rebellion did not sit well with Christian, I saw his grey eyes tighten ever so slightly. "It's not a bloody competition."

Jealousy burned through me next. "Because you'd win hands down."

Grey eyes widened and Christian's anger radiated off him. Luke and Taylor slipped away ever so slightly, tucking themselves in an unseen corner. Thankfully, there was nobody along the streets to watch our battle.

"I did not cheat on you, Ana." Christian seethed, balling up his fists at his sides.

Bitchiness reigned in me now. "How'd you know? You were too drunk to even remember who you're married to."

At my accusation, his hard front flaked slightly. I observed as his fists relaxed and his expression softened, "I watched the clip Ana, I heard what I said and saw what I did." Good. I did not have to explain my anger to him. "I'm sorry I hurt you, I wasn't myself."

His apology softened my own heart and in response, pain pulse through my veins next. It manifested in the form of pearls rolling down the sides of my face.

"Oh, my dear Ana." Christian cooed, his heart breaking as he took me into his chest without warning.

I lavished myself in his embrace, letting my tears stain his expensive jacket as I enjoyed the feel of us as one. In this moment, I could forget that we were on two different sides. I could forget that we had a child together.

Christian kissed the top of my head lovingly. "I was afraid of losing you when you told me about the baby." He confessed. "So I pretended I was alright with it but on my way to work, I became really frightened." I lay my ear against his chest and listened to his heart beat. "I realized I wasn't ready for a child, I wasn't ready to be a father and I panicked."

I sniffled into his chest once more and he kissed me against my head again. "But Ana, I'm not running away. Initially, I was bloody pissed at you for being so irresponsible... But a child... That's mine..." Just like my thoughts had been at the idea of a baby, his voice swooned along. "In you. My child is growing in you... If you think about it, that really makes you mine."

I was overjoyed from the inside out. Christian has verbally confirmed that I could keep his child... My child... Ours. That he was not about to abandon me, but rather, he was steadily warming up to the idea. It was reassuring, calming my nerves and soothing the hormones Luke and Ethan had been teasing me about.

"But in my moment of panic, I told Taylor to run home to check on you personally so I could go to the bar across GEH. I just needed some time to... Think. Some space to... Come to realize that I had to mature up to take care of our baby... I sat there drinking and trust me, I understand your obsession with alcohol. That stuff really makes you forget the world. And so I kept drinking."

The arms around me tightened and Christian kept talking. "Eventually, I got so drunk that I woke up in bed... Without you." There was a sense of hopelessness in his voice, a quiet sense of loss and fear. "Why did you leave me?"

I controlled my sobbing a little, "I couldn't sleep with you after what you did. It..." I blinked the tears away. "Hurt too much."

He encircled me closer to him, as if reassuring me of his undying love. "I'm tired of apologizing to you, Ana. I shouldn't even be making these mistakes. I never want to hurt you." Christian pulled away slightly, his fingers coming to cradle my chin and tilting it up so my eyes could lock with his. "I want to love and cherish you, make you feel like you're the most loved girl in the world."

"You do." My head was saturated with the intensity of his love, exploding in my face and allowing every good thing that he had ever done for me resurface.

Christian gave me a skeptical glance. "Most of the time." I added sheepishly.

"I know when I fail." Christian told me. "You tend to play this cat-and-mouse game with me."

The manner in which he labelled my behavior and response to his mistakes made me giggle a little. I was rewarded with a bright smile, "I love that sound. One day I will record it and set it as my ring tone."

"What would your colleagues think!" I shrieked excitedly at that thought.

"They'd be dead jealous of course." Christian laughed at my response. "Your giggle is a prized possession. Mine. "

I wrapped my arms around his waist, "Yours."

Christian chuckled, a sound of pride. "Yes, your little date with that bastard really doesn't affect me as much now that you're mine."

My heart stopped when I felt his habit kicking in again. Christian was like a modern day gollum. He would often lift my wedding band to his lips as a reassurance that I officially and legally belonged to him.

I saw my life flash before my eyes as he lifted my hand. Immediately, he turned to look at the other hand. When they both came up vacant, I knew I was in deep trouble.

**Too Close; Alex Claire**  
**Don't matter; Akon**  
**Pompeii ; Bastille**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Fix You

**Author's Note!**

**Okay, let me start by saying that I AM TRULY AND SINCERELY SORRY. Concerning the previous story line, I was in the crucial stages of my tennis competitions so I was just trying to rush a chapter out. (I know, not an excuse, sorry) And the only plotline in my head was from Streetcar Named Desire. So it just... yeah. And i'm sorry if I got my definitions wrong, I briefly googled and read the brief summary of the definition, so I just thought. And i'm sorry. I redid the chapters. I'd just like to clarify once more that you don't have to read this story? I'm not some phenomenal writer. My age has limitations, so please, be more understanding. Yup, i'm sorry. And concerning FSOGoodbye, I jammed on the storyline. So it's going to take a while to start it up again. Sorry!  
**

Christian's jaws clenched visibly, the vein in his neck popping up for the very first time. My heart was pounding, I could feel it in my mouth. His fingers in mine turned stone cold and he released my hands.

"Ch-" I started, my hands reaching for him.

He turned abruptly, my hands merely grazing his back. "Taylor, car."

Stepping out from the wings, Taylor nodded at Christian and fished the keys from his pocket. Without waiting for me, which I deserved, the love of my life stalked towards Taylor. Taylor gave me a look and a slight jerk of his head as Christian passed him, as if encouraging me to come after Christian.

I stood rooted in my place, my hands clammy and still mid-way in the air. I could hear myself breathing, panicked little huffs as Christian disappeared from my view. Charlotte and Giselle looking equally shaken at what must have been Christian's expression. When I failed to follow, Taylor pursed his lips and hurried after his employer.

"Let's go." Luke's voice was suddenly at my ear. The car already parked in the front.

"Go where?" I was defeated, unable to comprehend my irresponsible behavior once more.

Luke's fingers wrapped themselves around my elbow, "Where he's going. He's chased after you countless times, it's your turn."

My mind raced with countless of times Christian had pursued me upon being abandoned. Most of those times, he had been in no wrong. The man's undying love for me still astounded me until today. I could never imagine continuously having to put in effort to track someone down only to put in more effort to explain myself even when I was in the right. That was Christian's plight.

It had surprised me thoroughly when instead of exploding in my face, Christian had stormed off. It was so unlike him and it was starting to worry me. What if this was the final straw between us?

Christian had gone to great lengths to secure this ring on my finger and I just had to take it off. My inner goddess nodded with a resounding roll of her eyes. I knew he lavished at the picture of my finger banded, it gave him such immense joy. Yet, I had to steal his flame in such a manner.

I had begun to beat myself internally when Luke gave up waiting for me to make a decision. He practically wheeled me into the car and slammed the door shut. Leaping into the front seat, he flicked through his iPhone. "Christian's headed for his office." He pulled away at a lightning speed.

"Ana, I have no idea why you took of that ring but you better have a really good reason for it." Luke threw me a judgmental glare through the mirror. "You of all people know how that ring makes Christian tick."

Defeated, I let my head droop. What explanation did I have?

It was a spur of the moment kind of thing. The duties and baggage that had come with that ring had caught up with me and buried me completely under. The only out I saw was by removing that ring for that brief moment for a lame placebo effect. A decision that I was immensely regretting at the moment.

After what seemed like five seconds, Luke announced, "We're arriving." Grey Enterprises Holdings inc came into view at his words. "I suggest you super glue that ring back on, it might placate him slightly."

"Good idea." I whispered, breathless at the hounds within my head. My fingers fanned out across my right dress pocket and my heart fell. With the other hand, I hunted the other pocket, twisting to get a better angle. My heart began to race and I was driven into panic, slamming my hands in and out of my definitely empty pockets.

Noticing my disarray, Luke turned around to face me straight on. His eyes fell to my empty hands and his eyes widened in shock and disbelief, putting two and two together. "Hell."

I could barely hear myself think, my system beginning to crash at my situation. It was hopeless. Luke had parked in Christian's spare lot, Christian's Audi already allotted into the space beside ours. It was derelict, completely and ultimately derelict. Just like my mind and my heart and my finger.

"Ana, think. Where could it be?" He unbuckled his seat belt to enable him to twist around completely. "In a bag?" I shook my head, my hands turning clammy. "In another jacket or dress?" I shook my head once more, breaking out into cold sweat.

The idea of actually losing the ring was petrifying. Not because it cost a fortune but rather the symbolic reasons behind it was enough to kill Christian. I would have implied that his love and commitment was nothing to me, as easy as losing the ring.

"Breathe, Ana." Luke instructed. "It could be in your office. Call Claire to sweep it."

I raised my shaking hands in the air, realizing that they were numb beyond reason. With the solid senseless feeling, I grabbed at my phone and lifted it. Taking pity on me, Luke took it out from my hands and dialed for Claire on my behalf. "I don't suppose you can talk." Luke raised his eyebrows at me. It was all I could do to shake my head.

"Hey Claire, it's Luke." He said calmly. "Ana might have dropped her wedding ring in the vicinity." Before he could continue, I heard Claire's voice rise a couple of octaves and she screamed. Luke winced. "Yes, she did." He nodded. "Yes, pan out all the employees to search the building, anywhere she could have went."

He pressed the phone into the small in his jugular, directing his next question to me. "About what time?"

Not trusting my voice to carry me safely, I lifted my fingers to indicate it. "Nine." Luke told Claire, "Great, once it's located, drop me a call. Bye."

All I could feel was Claire's panic. Even she knew how deep in shit I was. "Ana, you have to go to Christian. There's no point waiting for the ring." In other words, it might never come. I was suddenly very cold. "Taylor says he's brooding in his office, it's best if you go on in."

That did not sound like too good an idea. What if he had given his assistant or security guards instructions to keep me out? Why else would he have left me standing there along the curb?

I was shaking. Finally, the tears forming in my eyes brimmed over and rolled down my cheeks. "Oh Ana..." Luke cooed. I closed my eyes and rubbed my tears away as Luke came around to open the car door for me, gently, he lifted me out of the car and into his arms. "Don't panic sweetheart, he loves you."

He would not now. I could see myself in his shoes. I could see how he would perceive this. The love of my life taking off his wedding ring to meet someone who had always been after his love. I could taste the betrayal and feel it in my bones. How on earth would Christian forgive me now?

"He loves you, Ana." Luke repeated before reclining, holding me at arms length as he studied me. "You can face him." He wiped away my tears. "Let's go, okay?"

I nodded. There was nothing else I could do. I was tired of constantly running and hiding. This time, we would both be running away from each other. If I did not solve this, jump over this hurdle, we might as well sign our divorce papers. I could not do that to our baby Grey, my fingers bumping against my abdomen lifelessly.

With a steady hand pressed against the small of my back, Luke led me into the office building. The usual bubbly and cheerful receptionists had lost their spark upon seeing my face, daring not to speak as I was hauled past them. Stepping into the lift with me, Luke was thoughtfully silent.

What would I say to Christian?

What would Christian say to me?

It was frightening. But I had gotten myself to this point and hence, this was a problem I would have to fix. All that was certain right now was that I loved Christian and I still did. I knew I had to fight to keep him.

"Oh, Mrs Grey!" The receptionist stationed outside of Christian's office had a look of fluster that mirrored my feelings. She looked relieved to see me.

Something has happened. Taylor stepped out from the inner chambers, guiding a very pale Andrea out of Christian's dungeon. The poor assistant looked shaken beyond relief. Luke raised his chin ever so slightly in an unspoken question which Taylor answered with a nod.

"Ana, he won't hurt you." Luke whispered reassuringly into my ear, guiding me forward and deeper into the spiral. "But you've got to be careful." He parked me outside the frosted glass doors of Christian's office, the assistant desk outside evacuated.

The tears kept rolling and my hand rested against the handle, realizing that Luke was letting go. I felt him fall back to give me some much needed room. I sucked in breaths to try to steady myself. Hopeless. It was now or never.

Just as I pushed the door open slightly, a grand shatter rang out from Christian's office. My heart fell and I forced myself to break through my fear to reach my potentially hurt husband. The door quietly closed behind me.

What first caught my eye was the mess in the office. Papers, files, books and stationery strewn all over the place. There was broken glass at my feet and behind it all was my beloved husband, leaning against the desk helplessly with his hands pulling his hair by its roots.

He was broken.

Christian had loosened his tie and unbuttoned the first two buttons of his very crumpled shirt. Steadily, I began to close the distance between us, my mind revolving around his well-being. Mustering up as much courage as I could, I began to lift my hands towards him, wanting to touch him.

"Don't." He groaned.

Immediately, my hand fell back behind me. I concealed my unbranded hand and my bottom lip quivered, watching his inner demons conceal him. "I love you, Christian." The tears met at my chin and slipped down my throat.

"Why did you do it, Ana." Christian pained, barely looking up at me. He did not want to look at me, as if just the sight of me would sting him and break him further.

I could not stand this. It was torture. "It was irrational." I cried, pleading for him to forgive me.

"Did you take it off for him?" He yanked his hair and I grabbed his fists within mine, tugging at them to stop giving him more pain.

Christian tensed at my contact, snatching his hands away from mine. His eyes opened, furious and maddened. At that moment, I thought I would have died. "No, I didn't." But his gaze was accusatory. "I love you, Christian."

He shook his head at me, refusing to believe me. "Are you ashamed to be married to me?"

"No!" I gasped, trying to reach for him again.

His eyes fell upon my fingers once more and he went into overheat, his anger materializing before me. "WHERE THE FU** IS YOUR RING, ANA?!" At his tone and volume, I stumbled back. He stopped leaning against the table and jumped forward, furious. "WHERE IS IT."

When I failed to answer, he grabbed my wrist roughly and lifted my hand in the air between us. I flinched, his hold too tight and too unfamiliar. I was used to his loving and caring ways, tender contact and intense devotion. Not this. "WHERE. IS. IT." He seethed, eyes wild.

The tears were running down my cheeks now, competing in the 100m sprint of the Olympics. "I... I... Lost it."

Christian's eyes narrowed and his jaws clenched, my insecurities wakening in him. All I could see was complete distrust and hurt, betrayal ringing through his gorgeous grey eyes.

"I love you, Christian." I tried once more, my voice weak and soft. It did nothing. My husband remained fixed in his posture, not moving.

We were truly broken now. I could see the aura of surrender surround him, radiating off him. We were broken and he was giving up. Maybe losing my ring was a foreshadow for this, for how our marriage would be inevitably broken.

Now, in this darkened room with his dark presence, I began to remember the better days. It was like a beacon of light, beckoning for me to find hope. The times when Christian would bring his lips to my ring. These times, I knew I was meant for him and made for him. But now... Without the ring, we were lost.

My hands turned clammy and I began to cry, the tears sliding down from my eyes and meeting at my chin. Quiet little pearls that will go unnoticed by the love of my life from now on.

**CPOV:**

HOW COULD ANA DO THIS?!

The only colour in my life was red. I was seeing red; whether anger or betrayal. They were both red.

Bastard Ethan.

Ana would never be able to begin to grasp how the punk threatened every molecule within me. Ana was my everything and anybody who wanted to take he away from me would be taking away everything from me.

Until this day, Ana still believed that they were just mere good friends. But she failed to understand that he loved her and no matter what she told herself, his intentions regarding her would always be grounded in infatuation.

The thing that rattled my cage the most was not the things he said to her. It was the genuine nature of how he said it. I could see it and hear it. The way he said it revealed his true feelings for her.

Ethan Kavanagh was still deeply in love with my Ana.

If anybody was to throw sugarcoated words at the love of my life, I would have tossed him about and thrown him a couple of punches of my own. However, dealings with Ethan were different. Firstly, the punk meant everything he said. So I could not penalize him for that.

Secondly, he meant too much to Ana. At times, I would catch her reading past text messages from Ethan. It stung, but I knew she needed him too.

Ever since we had gotten married, my displeasure towards Ethan had been a constant hindrance for Ana to reach out to him. Unfortunately, as much as I wanted her all to myself, Ana needed her best friend as well. The same way she needed Kate, Ana needed Ethan too.

Some times, I had tried to hint to her that hanging with Ethan would be fine. I would never explicitly allow her to do so. It was all very confusing. At other times, I would try and arrange for the two of them to casually bump into each other in public. However, that woman's schedule was always changing.

Speaking of schedules, Anastasia GREY had deceived me today. Initially, I had asked Gail to teach me how to make Carbonara pasta to take to Ana at work. Whenever I had a long day of meetings at work, Ana would bring me home cooked food. It was a loving gesture, one that was so intimate that I had wanted to try my hand at it.

Who knew that on the way there, Ana was already having lunch with one of my love competitors. I had called her assistant to sort out her timetable but that woman could not tell a lie to save her life. It had taken her all about ten seconds to dive into a series of apologies the moment I stared her down in the lobby.

It was like knives stabbing into my heart repeatedly as her words came out from her mouth, the betrayal on her lips had mirrored exactly how Ana must have felt when Elena came home with me. At that moment, I was ready to hang Ethan out to dry on the top of the Eiffel Tower. I had been charging out of her office only to see them conveniently pull up outside.

I had wanted to sort things out with her, to reason with her as I knew she was still suffering from my callous actions the night before. I had a good hold on my temper, just like John had taught me. But the moment I saw her…

But she was still mine. With or without her ring. And now that she had our child growing within her, she was mine more than ever. At the thought, my free hand gently probed along her belly. There was not a visible bump, but I could feel it beginning to cave out.

My Ana.

Our baby.

In the sun, her hair glowed like the sunset itself. A beautiful brown that had caught my eye and ever since, I had never let her go. It made me wonder of frightening things like what if our child had her hair?

The very idea of having a son or a daughter was the biggest scare to me in my entire life. Ana would make a great mother, but I had begun to fear my part in raising the child. What if I was so bad at it that she would turn to none other than Ethan Kavanagh for help?

I squeezed my eyes shut and fought back the emotions. These same emotions had haunted me when I realized she was not wearing her ring. It had been my only protection against Ethan and she had taken it off.

But why had she?

These thoughts were gnawing at me from the inside. Ethan knew she was married, I had made sure he came for our wedding. I squeezed the bridge of my nose, knowing that I had clients who took off their wedding rings purely for psychological reasons. It made cheating less daunting.

Had Ana?

Emerging from my zone of thoughts, I lifted my head to find Ana whimpering. I clenched my jaw, it seemed that nowadays, Ethan was the only one who could make her smile. The moment the thought had entered my head, I shook it hard to exile it.

No. No. There was no way I could or would lose to Ethan. Ana was rightfully mine. Her hands lifted as she started to wipe her tears away with her fists. Immediately, I stepped forward and caught her hands.

Her eyes fluttered open in surprise, the perfect blue I had grown used to had begun to sting red. It pained my heart and tortured me.

**APOV:**

My eyes opened to a troubled grey, his eyes haunted at the thought of me. I felt the insecurity blossom within me and panicked.

This is it, my inner goddess pursed her lips at me.

"P-p-pl-ease." I whimpered, taking a step back.

Christian surprised me by latching onto my wrist, preventing me from retreating. No no no. I pulled back a little more, only to be pulled in once more. I did not want to hear what he had to say.

"Please don't." I pleaded, regretting all the wrong things I had ever committed against him. They had piled up and brought us to this today. "Please." I could not even bring myself to look at him. "Please don't leave me."

There was a long pause as my words hung in the tense air.

It only frightened me more because I knew that the next instance he opened his mouth, my fate would be sealed. The thought lured my tears out, provoking them and causing me to cry harder. The feel of his hand around my wrist was the only warmth I could have, my heart freezing with the seconds ticking by.

"Leave you?" He sounded surprised. I looked up at him, my vision blurred by the dampness. "Do you want to leave me?"

He was giving me a choice? I shook my head hard, the movement swerving my tears off course. "Nooooooo." I screeched, choking on my tears.

His smile was glorious and before I could salvage it, he jerked my wrist forward. Losing my balance, I stumbled into his chest. "Nobody's leaving anybody, Ana."

**CPOV:**

This isn't over.

We will discuss this loss of her ring later on. But right now, she needed my reassurance more than I needed those answers. They could wait. I needed to give her the attention and embrace she desired before I lose her to Ethan once more. That bastard will not win.

**PLEASE REVIEW :)**

**Everything has changed; Taylor Swift**

**Apologize; One Republic**

**Love Affair; Copeland**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10: Wedding Rings

"Of course, Mr Grey." The lady said with a seductive smile and spark in her beautiful blue eyes. I wished I could lift wedding ring and wave it in my face. Unfortunately, I had lost it and this was how I was paying for it. "We'll have it fitted and delivered... Or..."

Christian had been nothing but a tame little lamb ever since our confrontation in his office. I had thought that we were over, but it was a complete 360 when he embraced me and assured me of his love once more. After which, he had taken me to get a new wedding ring at Cartier.

It was frightening in a way. There was no way Christian would have gotten over my error so quickly and without so much as a holler. It was as if he was a volcano, slowly building towards eruption. The anticipation of when he would erupt and the fear of when he would was enough to petrify me.

She batted her eyelids and my husband, "Would you prefer to pick it up?"

I clenched my jaw and narrowed my eyes. There was nothing more I desired than to wrap my fingers around her neck and squeezing. To feel the life jus-

"No, that will not be necessary." Christian said politely, a neutral attitude to her insistent flirtations.

The sales assistant stumbled for a moment, a slight fall in her expression which I would have missed if I was not scrutinizing every facial feature she had. Those eyes. Every atom within me concentrated, willing her eyes to darken or lighten. Anything but my exact eye colour.

Christian rose to his feet and we followed suit. As if searching for any excuse to touch my man, she extended her hand out to him. " Thank you, Mr Grey."

I'd cut her hand off. She turned to give me a slight glare, but nothing Christian would pick up. " Mssss Steele." She said with an annoying smirk.

I was clearly here in search for a replacement wedding ring to the one I had lost from our wedding which was covered by numerous of magazines. She was just seizing the opportunity. That was the last straw. "M-"

"Mrs Grey." Christian corrected with a firm smile that was still pleasant, retrieving his hand.

"Oh." The assistant said with slight disappointment.

As if she did not already know, my inner goddess growled.

It made me narrow my eyes even more. I gave her the sternest grimace I could but then realized it would make her seem even more attractive when in comparison to me. So I forced a sweet smile as Christian began to lead me out of Cartier.

"She was flirting with you." I accused under my breath. Usually, women flirting with Christian was a daily routine. But this woman had really gotten under my skin. "She called me Ms Steele."

Noticing my feathers were ruffled, Christian offered me a sympathetic shrug. "It's the same thing that would happen to you if I removed this." Christian waved his banded finger in the air and it made me feel secure for that moment. "It tempts."

Understanding sprouted within me and I acknowledged his words as a maxim. Being with Christian without my ring, even when he had his, suggested that I was not his wife. No, it was a loud statement that I was not his wife. Which wife removed her ring?!

My inner goddess shook her head at me, annoyed that it was only now that I had reached this epiphany.

"It's alright." Christian soothed, the cold metal of his ring pressing against my bare fingers as he laced them through mine. "Tonight you will officially be Mrs Grey."

Did that not make me Mrs Grey now? "Ch-"

"Forget it, Ana." He was suddenly irritated. I had tried countless of times to explain to him my mentality behind removing our ring but he kept turning me down. "I don't even know whether I want to know."

"It was too overwhelming." I squeezed in before he could stop me. I closed shut my eyes and focused on getting what I needed to say out, "Everything with Elena the night before amplified in an instant. It was like the walls were closing in on me..." I could still taste the panic and I slipped into a pant. "She gave me condolence flowers, Christian. And it was too hard to push past it. And some crazy part of me just ripped our ring of like..."

Christian's cool fingers embraced the tip of my chin and my eyes flew open into a sea of loving grey. It took my breath away further and my lungs began to contract. "Breathe," he instructed with a calm that was infectious. I did. "Like what, sweetheart?"

Sweetheart. My heart melted into a pool of malt. My voice was much softer now, "Like... It was what was...

Preventing me... From..." His soft eyes urged me on. "Breathing."

There was a pause as Christian sponged up what I had confessed, but his expression remained fixed as a statue of love. "Ana, look." He lifted our intertwined hands up so I was faced with his ring. "This ring is what's going to keep us together. It's the exact opposite of what you feel, and I'm sorry that you feel that way b-"

"Ch-" I started to assure him different.

But his index finger pressed against my lips as he smiled at me with a shake of his head. "Listen," I nodded obediently. "In times of trouble and storms, this ring is going to keep you alive and... Breathing."

Breathing. I was breathing.

"I will deal with the bitch," the word on his lips did not suit his tone. "But know that just like you belong to me, I belong to you too."

Christian pressed his lips against the back of my hand. "You never have to run because I can and will protect you from anything that threatens you."

"She gave me flowers to console me for the lost of our baby." I pouted, wishing I never read that card. "I thought it was from you."

There was a glimmer of something in his eyes, but he hid it quickly. "Anastasia, I want our baby." My heart pounded at his tone of conviction. "And just like I will protect you, I will protect our baby."

Our baby! My inner goddess heaved a sigh of relief.

Our baby. Christian had said our baby. I could just imagine our growing child smiling in his slumber. His father and finally recognized his existence and accepted it. Finally. It did much to chase away the bitterness Elena had left in my mouth.

Christian stroked my cheek bone with his fingers. "And if I gave you flowers, you'd know they were from me."

I knew exactly what he meant. All the times Christian had given me flowers, it had been very grand. I would step into an office full of flowers; bouquets neatly organized around the room. Christian did not need any occasion to give me flowers, he simply just gave.

"We'll move past this." Christian said, confident. "But please, love, never take off your ring again."

"Never." I promised, squeezing his fingers as his irises contracted at the pain of what I had done. "You don't care about the one I lost?"

"What do you mean?" Christian asked as we headed for his new toy. A fierce red Ferrari, customized to his liking. Taylor and Luke were waiting behind the car in the Audi.

"Christian," I stared at him knowingly, " I dropped a fortune worth of a ring. I saw your bank statement." When I had, it had taken me a long while to regain speaking abilities.

He shrugged, a playful careless shrug. "Hey. Just because your name or our anniversary is pretty much key to all my privacy, you can't be seeing things like that."

I folded my arms and raised my eyebrow. He was evading my question.

"Come on," He spun me a little. "Ana, it's just a ring. Replaceable."

"It cost a fortune!" I squirmed.

"Ana, if anybody was to kick up a fuss about the money lost, it would be me." He explained, "But it's not about the money lost so the money lost isn't worth out time."

"Maybe you have too much money." I hissed, tightening my arms.

Christian threw back his head in a carefree laughter, "I can't say I don't."

"It's time you start donating it." I narrowed my eyes at him. "Put it to good use."

He laughed harder and shook his head, a sparkle in his eyes. "Love, sweet Ana," he pulled me in for a quick lock of the lips. "The Grey Foundation is an international association that funds scholarships, research and development and well, I'd say the list is pretty impressive."

That I had no idea.

"I'll take you to visit some of the children soon, a trip is due." Christian grinned. He was proud.

"I really am sorry, Christian." I apologized once more, ignoring his lack of care for his finances regardless of how much his minute pay cheques were.

"Ana," Christian smiled sweetly at me, "Just never do it again." I nodded at him. He bent in to plant one on the tip of my nose, "Did you want to have dinner tonight?"

"I'd want to have dinner with you every night, Mr Grey." Without permission, I tiptoed and kissed him hard on his lips.

Christian growled a hungry growl as his arms fastened around my waist, lurching forward to deepen the kiss just as I managed to free myself. His eyes were hungry for me as his hands came up bear, "Anastasia Grey." He licked his lips seductively and everything south of my navel quivered in anticipation.

I bit my bottom lip and thrust my chest out in show, flaunting them right in front of his men. It had perfect effect and Christian narrowed his eyes, jealousy building within them; enough jealousy to feed his sex drive. I will please my husband as a reward for his good behavior.

Wordlessly, he bent forward to open the Ferrari door. "In."

I obliged, sliding in as he closed the door after me.

**CPOV:**

I am going to take her.

Repossess what is rightfully mine. It was a moment of empowerment, a reminder that Anastasia Grey is mine. This was one thing that would belong to me forever, a place that bastard Ethan will never be able to taint. I had taken her virginity and I will take her every moment to remind her of who I am. My member quaked in anticipation for Ana to scream my name as she came, assuring me of my power over her body.

Crap.

That's not my member quaking.

I reached for my phone and pulled it out in a slick movement. Taylor raised his eyebrow in question from the Audi. 'Welch' I mouthed to him and he nodded back at me. Luke and Taylor dropped into a discussion as I picked up the call.

"Make it quick." I rasped, the desire slipping into my voice by the millisecond.

"Yes, Mr Grey." The obedient man said. "I checked the tapes. Nothing unusual, she sent the flowers via a delivery."

"Welch, she seems to know my every move." I was a little melodramatic, still trying to figure out why and how she had appeared at the bar and taken me home. In addition, she had appeared at my work place this morning the same time I did. It was peculiar.

"Yes, Mr Grey. I understand, but there's no evidence in the tapes."

"Speaking of tapes." I fed him bait.

He bit. "I'm sorry, Mr Grey. There's some problem with pulling the tape from the bar. I am working on it."

"What kind of problem?" My suspicion flew to Elena once more.

Welch cleared his throat, "Nothing out of the ordinary unfortunately, sir. Just some wires and angles. The bar did not have a working camera, they were all dummies."

"I don't like to hear about problems, Welch."

"Yes, Mr Grey."

"So fix it." I said sternly, asserting my authority over Welch.

"Right away, Mr Grey."

"Did you retrieve the card." I stated, he better had done it already.

"Yes, Mr Grey. I've sent it over to the house."

"Good." I said and Ana pressed her face up against the Ferrari window playfully, taunting me by sticking her tongue out. Oh she is going to get it. I hang up on Welch and climb into the car, whisking the love of my life towards our tower where we will make love. Multiple times.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11: Chains

**Author's Note!**

**Hello fellow readers. Before you go on to read this, may I ask if any of you are from the Boston/MA area? It's college hunting time and I'm extremely (extremely times infinity) keen on Tufts and Wellesley. Please PM me if you are! I have a few questions… thank you!(:**

I stretched across the bed, my fingers searching for my beloved husband. When they came back empty, I forced the drowsiness away and my eyes opened to an empty bed. It was late in the morning, the sun was shining in, lightening up the room.

Thinking about the night before, an embarrassed smile spread itself across my face and I pulled the sheet over my now sensitive chest. Christian would forgive me for waking up late. I had been exhausted and barely conscious when we were done, to which he had still been energetic and informed me that he was canceling work for me today.

Unfortunately, my workaholic husband was probably off in the office playing with his staff. I sighed and stretched, cracking a few sore muscles in the process. I always felt that Christian's sex drive was fueled by emotions of jealousy and anger. Which reminded me of my new ring. It had probably been delivered last night, but Christian and I had been rather... Occupied the moment we had stepped in.

My phone jumped to life at the bedside table and hoping it was not anything from business, I grabbed at it. "Claire."

"Good morning, Mrs Grey. I hope you're feeling better." She chimed, as if trying to infect me with her high spirits.

"Better?" I rubbed at my eye lazily.

"Why yes, Mr Grey informed me that you have a high fever and won't be coming into work today."

So much like Christian. "Yes, thank you. The fever went down after a good night's rest."

"That's brilliant news!" She cheered, practically clapping. It made me suspicious. As expected, her tone dimmed down a few notches. "Because we spent eons searching... But nothing."

I smiled. It was like Claire to cushion my fall whenever she could. "It's alright, Claire. Christian's bought me a new one."

"A new one?!" She gasped, having cooed over my previous ring. It had been the largest karat the woman had ever seen in her life.

I laughed out loud at her reaction and shook my head at my assistant's shock that had mirrored mine exactly. "Yes, he's rather... Insistent I have a ring immediately." She was quiet. "Anything else?" I probed.

"Nothing else!" She dismissed. "I'll see you soon, have a good rest."

"Definitely, thank you Claire. Do transfer any calls or issues directly to me in my absence." I still had to be a responsible CEO despite Christian's frivolousness.

"Oh, no, Mrs Grey. Absolutely not!" Claire squealed. "Mr Grey ordered me to handle everything in your absence, so be assured there will be no pip from work while you're resting."

Christian. Christian. I sighed. "Alright then, guess there's nothing I can do. See you, Claire."

After putting down the phone, I proceeded to freshening up. I was going to look my best before going to find Christian who was probably buried under heaps of work and running his hands through his beautiful copper hair.

I opted for a Ayellow sundress that didn't reveal much cleavage, however it would be enough for Christian to stare at me hungrily. Just when I was finished changing my phone started jumping at the table. I wondered whether it was Claire calling to say that my ring had been found and I could return the new one Christian had graced me with.

To my utmost surprise, it was Ethan's glorious smile that flashed on my iPhone. "Hey Ethan!"

"Ana!" He cried, in relief. "I tried to call you so many times last night, what were you doing?"

What was I doing? I flushed, embarrassed. More like who was doing me.

"Anyway, I need to see you immediately." Thankfully, Ethan cut me off before I could explain myself.

Immediately? "Why, what's wrong?" I was suddenly worried. "Are you alright?"

"It's not a bad thing, sweetheart." Ethan cooed, reassuring me. "Sorry if it sounded like that." I heaved a sigh of relief. "I need to pass you a gift."

"A gift?" I smiled a little, knowing that Ethan's gifts were always straight from the heart and never cost too much. "What is it?"

"Come down and see for yourself!" He chimed, laughing happily.

I perked up instantly. "You're downstairs?"

"Yeah, the two reception flirts said you never came in this morning so I figured." He had gone to my work?

This must be a really big surprise gift. "I'm sorry, did I ruin your surprise?"

Ethan sounded a little embarrassed, "Yeah... But all's well if you come down now."

Perfect timing. I was fresh enough to give Ethan a huge hug. "You don't want to come up?"

"Nah, I've got to run after." He sounded apologetic. "Sorry, sweetheart."

"Hey, no problem."

"Besides, I don't exactly want to have a testosterone clash with that husband of yours..." He teased, "It might break your heart when I come up on top."

"Ha-ha, very funny." I retorted, "Christian takes boxing as a hobby." There was a hint of pride in my tone as I rubbed the facts in Ethan's face to defend my husband.

"Oh yeah?" Ethan chuckled, "Well, I'm a freaking Jedi."

It made me roll my eyes and I made my way out of the bedroom. Luke and Taylor were not in sight, but Gail was cleaning a dining table which signified that the men had just went through breakfast.

"Hah, more like the useless Princess!" I chucked at Ethan who hated Princess Leia with a passion and Gail looked up to greet me with a beam. I pressed the speaker to the side of my neck while Ethan spoke of his own skills, "Morning Gail, where's Christian?"

"Morning Ana!" She said in a hushed tone, "He's on the phone just like you, in the office though!"

I nodded at her graciously. "Ethan, don't you think you're more of Dr Watson rather than Sherlock?" I taunted, "Mulan's Mushu, Peter's Tinkerbell and Jay Chou's Green Hornet?"

"WHY YOU!" Ethan growled as I entered Christian's office with a soft knock.

My man was leaning back in his recliner with the phone pressed against his ear, his lips in a fake smile as he laughed for the sake of whoever was on that phone. It turned genuine and sweet upon seeing me. I pressed my finger to my lips as Ethan listed who Christian probably came second to as well and I bent down to press my lips against Christian's forehead.

Covering the speaker, I positioned my lips just above his ear to send tingling sensations through the man, "Good morning, beautiful."

"Good morning, handsome." Christian returned with a wicked smirk as his fingers clasped my wrist and brought them to his lips. A look crossed his face and he choked, "You misheard me, I said good methodology, that's a brilliant idea." I laughed at his recovery quietly and retrieved my wrist. Giving him a wave of my fingers, I winked at him and retreated.

"Silence means consent, Ana." Ethan had protested as I stepped out of the room.

" Oh quit it, Kavanagh. I'm on my way down." With that, I double tapped my phone and shoved it down a pocket, climbing into the lift.

When I first stepped out, I am greeted with a stunning Ethan Kavanagh clad in suit and tie. It was impressive and I shot him one of those boyish winks as I wolf-whistled. He had his hair done up in a quiff. He broke into a cherubic smile and shrugged sheepishly.

"Is this part of my present?" I thrilled, wondering if he would whip out a guitar and start serenading me.

"Ha-ha." Ethan narrowed his eyes, fidgeting with his collar button.

Christian had often fumbled with his own too and by now, it was already in my nature to assist him. "Here, let me." I said, stepping forward and brushing Ethan's fingers aside.

Reluctantly, he arched his neck to give me better access as I buttoned it for him. "I'm going for an interview today."

"An interview? That's great news!" I gushed, finally fixing the button and stowing my hands. "Where?"

Ethan nodded at me, "Yeah! For a scholarship to London, they have one of the best Docteral programs there."

"You're leaving?" I was shocked, never expecting Ethan to leave so quickly. We usually spent quite a fair bit of time away from each other seeing that we studied in different schools.

"I'll come back and visit, of course!" Ethan promised. "And you'll have Kate to support you while I'm gone."

"I suppose." I said, defeated. "So why the interview?"

"But it's a tad bit costly so I'm applying for a scholarship." He said, squinting his eyes a little as he said a 'tad bit', indicating that it was more expensive than he made it out to be.

"Well, I'm sure you'll get it!" I clasped my palms together in as much excitement I could muster as possible.

"Okay! Pause!" Ethan exclaimed, his own palms flying up to indicate that I should stop. I did. He laughed at my amused expression, "This is about you and not about me, so quit side tracking me." As if in complete compliance, I pretended to zip my lips shut and lose the key. He nodded at me appreciatively and reached into his inner jacket pocket to reveal a small leather box.

I felt my eyes physically widen, stretching so wide that it was growing uncomfortable. At this point, there was no need to restrain myself from talking; I was completely at a lost for words as I stared at him, gobsmacked.

"Listen, Ana." Ethan said, his blue eyes darkening slightly as a slight dimple lined his right cheek. He lifted the ring box a little higher, my heart pounding loudly in my chest. "There are certain things that you need to know." I could hear my brain explode as he opened the little box to reveal a ring.

I gasped. "Ethan!" A radiant smile broke across my face as the ring matched the image I had been dreaming about for the past night. "Thank you!"

"I'm a lucky bastard and so are you." Ethan beamed, taking the ring out from its nest.

"Where was it?!" I exclaimed in complete disbelief.

Ethan laughed, reaching for my hand as he began to slip the ring back to its proper position. "It was in my car the front s-"

Before he could finish, lights began to flash and we turned to find a hoard of reporters gushing towards us. They had been disguised earlier as people sitting around in the lobby or checking out Escala. From the corner of my eye, I watched as the receptionists at the front desk panicked, reaching for the phone just as the reporters hit me.

CPOV:

"Where's Ana?" I inquired, having come out of the office and searched for my wife in every inch of this apartment. I had come up empty.

"Mr Grey, she just went down." Gail responded, busy whipping up an early lunch.

"Went down?" Did I not cancel work for her today? That crazy workaholic of a wife I had. I began to dial Claire on my phone.

"Mr Grey." Sawyer greeted, stepping into the room.

Sawyer? Why would Sawyer be here? "Why aren't you with Ana at work?"

A look of confusion spread across the man's face. "Mr Grey, there's a situation downstairs." Taylor said, stepping out from the wings of his private office.

I narrowed my eyes and clenched my jaw. "What. Situation." The phone in my hand began to buzz and I looked down to see Welch calling. I glared at Taylor and then at Sawyer, annoyed that they had failed to answer me.

"The paparazzi is downstairs with Ana..." He started, stirring the anger within me at the annoying media dogs"...and Ethan." He just had to add.

The look that crossed Sawyer's face signified he knew nothing about this. Seeing that he was my wife's bodyguard, this was fuc*ing unacceptable. I was just about to give him a piece of my mind when the irritating buzzing in my pocket was too had to ignore. "WHAT!" I spat, signaling for both the men to follow me towards the elevator.

"Sir, we managed to pull the tape you wanted." He sounded wary, as if he had something to hide.

"That's good isn't it?!" I was in no mood for games.

He side lined my answer, " I've sent it directly to your phone, sir."

Without bothering, I jabbed the end call button and stepped into the lift with my men flanking me. Just as Welch had promised, the video was up and running on my screen. I watched, as I had been drunk beyond consciousness, my head against the counter top. Any time now, Elena would appear. Yet, to my complete and utter surprise, out of the corner someone else did.

**Boston; Augustana**

**Please review. Your opinion is important!**


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12: One step forward, two steps back.

"ANA!" Ethan cried, trying to reach for me as the wave of reporters swept through us from all sides.

We were backed up against the lift wall. By now, I had grown used to these kind of situations. My eyes had familiarized with the awkward bright flashes, no longer easily agitated or easily dizzy from any of it. Of course, I hated the many voices bombarding my ears. Some were shouting and some were screaming, beckoning for me to answer. But they always failed to realize that if everyone was talking at the same time, I could never catch the question and hence, would never answer anything.

I pitied Ethan, who was practically cowering under the spotlight. He was sweating profusely, trying his best to reach out to me physically. Some part of me thought he was trying to protect me but another part told me that Ethan was shaken by it all and wanted a hand to hold. Regardless, I stretched my hand out to him, trying to grasp his across the sea.

There was a 'ding' of the elevator and I heard the doors roll back. The effect was immediate; like throwing a bone to dogs, all the reporters focused their attention on one person.

With a completely porcelain-like expression, Christian stepped out from the lift with Luke and Taylor as guardians. Before anybody could flood Christian, the two of them leaped forward and acted as a barricade. The reporters fought against the barrier, trying to break through it.

Christian narrowed his eyes slightly at the situation and I thought I saw him shoot an icy glare at the Escala staff. With swift fingers, Christian reached for Ethan's collar and jerked him into the lift with him. I was slightly further way and out of my saviour's arm length. It did not please him. "Luke."

At his name, Luke fastened his hand around my wrist and gently tugged me towards himself. Intercepting, Christian looped his arm around my waist and helped me into the lift as well. I was happy to see him, wrapping my arms around him. Christian tapped in the code and the doors began to close, shooting us up towards safety.

"Ana." Christian said monotonously, trying to pry my hold off him. He was successful and I staggered back slightly.

"What?" I asked, confused.

I watched in utter shock as Christian swerved on his feet, bringing his clenched fist into an unsuspecting Ethan's jaw. "CHRISTIAN!" I screamed, flying to his side and grabbing his arm as he delivered one more blow.

Ethan had already lost his balance, Christian's grasp propping him up via his collar. His blue eyes were filled with no retaliation, he was docile and took the beating. "CHRISTIAN!" I begged, tugging at his arm. Had Christian thought Ethan was proposing to me as well? Had he thought I had accepted it?

What else would warrant such an unprecedented behavior? My inner goddess snarled.

My husband's eyes were enraged, burning with a fire out to kill. The lift 'dinged' and the air con from our apartment welcomed us. Christian lifted Ethan with just an arm, hauling him out of the lift and into the lobby. "CHRISTIAN STOP!" I pleaded in desperation, trailing after them.

Ethan's eyes were groggy from the beating, beginning to roll back into his head as his nose bled from the right nostril. "YOU'VE GOT IT WRONG. PLEASE STOP." I shouted, trying to break Christian's trance.

"WRONG?!" He blasted, not even looking at me. He held Ethan with a look filled with daggers and flung him to the floor with immense strength. There was a loud crash as Ethan's back hit the coffee table. I gathered all the adrenaline I could and leaped in front of Ethan just as Christian charged for him. I threw my arms out like an eagle motivated with the desire to protect her chick.

Realizing this in his semiconscious state, Ethan reached for the hem of my dress and tugged as hard as he could. Just as Ethan had expected, I came tumbling down and onto his stomach.

"YOU FU**ING BASTARD." Christian hollered, about to strike when Taylor stepped in front of him and shoved him back. Christian spewed many unkind words at Taylor, who was now using his own chest to keep Christian away.

Luke dashed forward to help me up, trying his best to scrape me off Ethan. "No Luke," I whimpered, fear-filled. "I have to keep him safe."

Softly, with a father-like tenderness, Luke whispered so Christian would miss it, "And I have to keep you safe." He lifted me off the floor, sweeping me into his arms.

"GET. HER. OUT. OF. HERE." Christian barked, his fists clenched by his sides as he restrained himself. Taylor had both palms pressed against Christian's biceps now, coaxing him to calm down.

Luke began to walk and I flailed against him. How could I leave Ethan here unprotected to bear the brunt of the misunderstanding?! "Why are you doing this Christian?!"

His grey eyes flew to me, absolutely incredulous. "Why?" Even soft, his tone was deadly.

"It's a misunderstanding!" I was thankful that he stopped for the moment, agreeable to listening to me.

"MY F*** IT IS!"

"LOOK!" I exclaimed, desperately throwing my banded finger in the air. "Ethan was just returning it! No harm done!"

"NO HARM DONE?!" He was sarcastic and it frightened me. Raising his finger at Luke, he pointed towards the bedroom. Nodding, Luke started to walk me there.

I was helpless. Luke's steel grip was rigid around my body and I could only watch as Christian commanded Taylor to haul a crumpled Ethan into the office. Christian shot me a stern glare of warning before heading into the office first.

"Please..." I begged Taylor softly.

The man had Ethan propped up on an arm and he offered me a reassuring smile. Knowing Christian would hear anything he said, he sated me with a little nod. It was only then that I knew whatever happened, Taylor would protect Ethan from bodily harm.

Luke lowered me gently on the master bed, a hand resting on my shoulder as I began to sob. "Are you alright?"

"Of course not." I wiped my tears away with the back of my hand. "Why... Why... Why is he acting like that?" I was so confused. Had he not seen the ring on my hand? His own ring? "It's my fault for dropping it, Luke. Why's he taking it out on... Ethan?"

The memory of Christian pounding Ethan so fiercely played itself in my head, sending goosebumps down my spine. It made me fear for Ethan's safety. Who knew what Christian was up to now?

"Ana," Luke sighed, tucking a stray tendril of hair behind my ear. "It's not the ring."

I could hear the confusion in my voice, "What?"

Luke's eyes searched mine, "Ana, there's something else..." He tried to find a suitable phrase, "... Ethan did."

"What?" I could not stand this. I had to know. The tears continued to flow down my cheeks.

"Okay. I'll take you to the camera room so we can eavesdrop... On one condition." Luke lifted his index finger to my eye level. "You have to stop crying." I nodded in agreement, scrubbing the tears off my cheeks. "We both know Christian's hawk-like skills. If I bring you out and he hears you crying..."

"Got it."

Luke smiled at me grimly, helping me up by the elbow and guiding me out. The office door was closed shut, a heavy mahogany door that promised little eavesdropping from my side. Luke pressed his index finger to his own lips, reminding me of the need for silence, as he took me into the camera room.

There were a million cameras running at that moment. Well, not really a million. But there were many... I had never been here before. Cameras covered every inch of this house. "Wow." I could not stop the shock from leaving me.

Luke chuckled, proud. "We're all eyes and ears in here." He nestled me down into the comfortable leather chair and began tapping away at a sophisticated computer gadget thing. Immediately, he pulled up all angles of the office into view.

"Oh thank God!" I sighed in relief as Ethan was still alive, sitting in the chair opposite Christian's king chair. Taylor had kept his promise, standing near the office table to prevent any sudden violent attacks from happening.

"Volume." Luke snapped his fingers, remembering. He played with some more gadgets and then the sound was up.

Christian stared Ethan down, joining his fingers with each other. "We're married and she's pregnant with our child, Kavanagh."

"I know." Ethan replied softly, his head dropping in shame.

"And yet." It wasn't even a question, more an accusation. "What did you think you would have achieved by doing this?" Christian probed, the anger saturating his irises. "You'd think Ana would leave me? Leave me for you?"

"I didn't have a plan." Ethan said, exasperated.

"But you had a goal, didn't you?" Christian accused, narrowing his eyes. "You wanted Ana and you still do." Ethan remained silent, refusing to answer. The elongated pause made my heart pound in confusion.

Hadn't Ethan and I moved past this?

Ethan and I had decided to push back any feelings for each other like mature adults a long time ago. There simply was no way for us to love each other, especially not when my love for Christian was a mountain that cannot be moved. I had talked it through with Ethan. It was only on that condition that I had allowed us to resume our tight friendship. It was the basis that I had allowed myself to dismiss Christian's warnings as mere insecurities. But if Ethan...

It took you this long?! My inner goddess rolled her eyes at my naive and juvenile perspective.

"Kavanagh, I can't allow this to go on and you know it." Christian folded his arms. Ethan nodded sadly, running his palms down his face in exhaustion. "It's not healthy for you either."

"It's not like I'm doing it on purpose, Christian." Ethan groaned through his palms. "I've tried to stop loving her but I can't. And when you love someone for that long... Nobody is good enough for her." He sighed. "And when I see her upset because of you... It just worsens."

Christian was the one to sigh now, scraping his scalp with his fingers. "I apologize for stepping in and sweeping Ana away from you. It was unfair of me, I admit, but I love Ana just as much as you do. So I'm going to ask you to surrender Ana from here on."

"Not... See her anymore?"

What was this? What right did Christian have to do this? It made me slightly mad. Ethan was my best friend. He has been ever since I met Kate.

"It's for the best." Christian pursed his lips. "I can't let you break up our family. But thank you for returning the ring regardless, Ana was so worried she had lost it."

I was more confused than ever. If Christian had not beaten Ethan up for possessing my ring... My inner goddess mirrored my frustration, shrugging.

"I'll never be able to get her something like that." Ethan sounded defeated, it was heartbreaking.

"Look, Kavanagh." Christian himself began to crack. "I'm sorry that it has to come down to this. You should take some time off, see the world, meet new people."

"And never come back?" Ethan chuckled sarcastically, interpreting Christian's words waywardly.

"No, come back whenever you want." Christian smiled grimly. "You're still a family friend."

By now, I was out of my wits trying to figure out the reason behind this. What had Ethan done that had convinced Christian that he was still in love with me? What had Ethan done that had given Christian the right to dismiss my dear friend?

As if reading my mind, Luke put a soothing palm against the small of my back. "Ana, Ethan was the one who called Mrs Robinson that night..."

It was like the air within my chest suddenly abandoned me, leaving me with a sense of hollowness. I was like a toad shrunken within its skin, a part of me in disbelief at Luke's words. Ethan knew how Elena made me feel and how she was the source of a myriad of my insecurities. Just the mention of her name was enough to make me quiver. If Ethan had... No way. "You're lying."

Luke's eyes lit up with sympathy and he continued to stroke my back. "You're lying!" I repeated, louder this time. The idea of Ethan being the one to initiate such a thing... To trick me into believing that Christian would return to that bitch... I shook my head hard as betrayal whipped my anger alive.

Luke's lack of response was sufficient in helping me draw a conclusion. He had somehow found the courage to tell me something that Ethan had failed to and was reluctant in having to repeat it. Luke had held Ethan in a good light, always trusting him to help me heal from anything that would affect me. There was no doubt that Ethan's betrayal had come as a shock to Luke as well.

It made me jump to my feet, Luke fell backwards onto the floor in utter shock. There was no need for me to wait, I knew Luke would attempt to stop me. Balling up my fists, I charged into the office and interrupted Ethan and Christian shaking hands across the table. Taylor's eyebrows rose in surprise and was soon mirrored by Christian's.

However, Ethan had his back turned to me and would never have thought that I would grab him hair first and toss him to the floor. "YOU BASTARD!" I hollered, red tainting my vision as I slapped him across the cheek where Christian had created a visible bruise.

A slap?! My inner goddess shook her head at me, having put on her Muay Thai gear and was ready to tumble.

Ethan's jaw had smears of blood, evidence of his earlier abuse. But it did little to dissolve my anger. Lifting my clenched fist high in the air, I let it dive knuckles first into his stomach. There was no satisfaction as Ethan's eyes squeezed shut in pain. "GO TO HELL." I screamed, but all there was was pain.

My heart was throbbing at his betrayal. Seeing him beat up by my husband and then by me did not change that. All it did was agitate my torture as I realized that we had come down to this stage, where I was aggressively and willingly physically hurting him.

Luke burst into the room a split second before Christian had my arms locked behind my back in a firm grip. "Ana, I want you to breathe." My jaws were still clenched tightly as Taylor and Luke tended to Ethan. Ethan refused to look at me, his head sweeping the floor and accepting his fate. "Please see Mr Kavanagh out."

When the office door clicked shut, Christian grip around my wrists turned into feather-like caresses. He spun me around slowly so I was facing him. Gingerly, his right hand reached up to lift my chin, "Are you okay?"

I was dumbfounded. My mind was still trying its best to comprehend the fact that my best friend had betrayed me. All along, Christian had been right about Ethan's love for me. It never faded and I was stupid to think it had. Now I felt stupid and guilty, recalling all the times I had probably hurt Christian in the process of my friendship with Ethan.

"Ana?" He began to worry, his grey eyes searching mine for any life.

I wrestled back the tears, my vision beginning to water. "I'm so sorry Christian. I'm so sorry for accusing you of approaching Elena. I'm so sorry. Please, forgive me. "

"Hey hey," Christian stopped my mouth with his index finger, shaking his head at me. "I don't blame you, Ana." His tone was soft and genuine, tenderizing my heart in too many ways as I began to choke on my tears trying to keep them back. Christian has loved me from Day one and all I ever did was take him for granted. "I never did."

"How can you not?" I whimpered, reaching to wipe my tears.

Christian beat me to it, gently brushing them aside. "Because I love you, Ana." He cooed, then switched up for a comical tone. "And frankly speaking, you're so blur and unaware of your surroundings that you miss things like Ethan."

The way he said it made me laugh a little, but it made me feel guiltier. My guilt manifested in the form of fresh tears, rolling down my cheeks at a fast pace. Christian pursed his lip and drew me into his chest, a hand at the base of my back and another around the nape of my neck. "It's alright Ana." He kissed the top of my head. "Your personality gives me a chance to protect you, which is so often, and I like that."

I let myself rest against Christian's chest, taking in slow steady breaths to calm myself down. Christian held me close, "I want you to need me Ana. Me. I don't like it when you depend on anyone else."

I nuzzled my nose into his chest, relishing the feel of his familiar warmth. I liked depending on Christian. "I do depend on you."

Christian sighed, discontentedly. " Just as much and maybe less than you depend on Ethan."

"That's not true." I whimpered at the accusation.

"I'm not trying to fight, Ana. I just want you to see how I see it. This thing between you and Ethan," to confirm his point, Christian clutched me closer to him in a loving embrace. "And now you know I was never imagining things... it was headed towards a 'more than friends' zone, especially for Ethan."

Just the sound of his name felt raw on my heart. I flinched. "Don't," Christian chided softly. "It's not his fault."

"How is it not?" I wrapped my arms around Christian's back. "He tried to break us apart and I was letting him."

"But I would never." Christian said with complete conviction and I knew it was true. Part of me had never bothered so much with how comfortable I got with Ethan because I knew that Christian would be like an anchor to our boat, keeping me from drifting too far. "And besides, love."

At the tone of his voice, I took a small step back so I could look at him. Christian smiled warmly at me, " Remember how you justified Leila's actions?"

Oh shit. I knew where he was going with this. "No."

His smile turned into a full blown grin as he knew he had found the perfect moment to turn my own words against me. "Oh, it's a good thing I do."

I stuck my tongue out at him.

In response, Christian's eyes burned with a new fire, one fueled by lust. "I miss you."

I knew exactly what he was referring to. "What? But I'm right here."

He smirked, "We both know what I miss, Grey."

" Do we now?" I said, coyly batting my eyelids.

Christian ran a thumb across my lip, freeing my bottom from the teeth that had encased it. "Good attempt at distracting me, Ana. I'd say you managed at least twenty seconds this time round."

I sighed, exasperated.

"Ethan loves you and that's why he acted that way." Christian said, happily getting it off his chest.

I could not deny it. My face simply slipped into a petulant pout.

A low rumble escaped Christian's chest and he dived in to lock his lips around mine. He distracted me with his wandering fingers; they hunted along my thighs towards their destination. His lips were urgent and his tongue battled mine in an apocalyptic battle to the finish. My mind was spinning with Christian's name, knowing full well that this was his intention all along.

Christian was leading my thoughts away from the hurt Ethan had committed, but the larger part of all this was his reminder to me that I was his. He was going to repossess me to make his point crystal clear. And, I was going to love every minute of it. I stepped up onto my tiptoes and linked my fingers behind his neck. In a swift movement, not even breaking our connection, Christian lifted me off the ground and carried me towards the one place he would always know he owned me completely.

** Please review!**

**When I was your man; Bruno Mars**


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13: Husbands and Businesses

**Author's Note!**

**Real sorry for this coming in late, I had an exam today and will be taking my SATs in a day, so wish me luck and keep me in your prayers! Also, do catch 'I give it one year', I'd say Guy is precisely like the less-haunted version of our Christian Grey.**

"Now remember, Ana." Christian started, buttoning his shirt in place. "The spare wedding ring is in the safe." He turned around to whip me a naughty smile, "If you ever lose the one you're wearing now...the spare is sitting in my office."

Trying my best to slaughter and repress my slick tongue, I forced the most charmed smile I could. "Of course."

"If you lose them both..." Christian said in mock seriousness, "I'll just have to buy you a few more."

"THAT'S NOT NECESSARY!" I shouted, the blood rushing into my cheeks.

Christian did not even bother to keep his laughter in check, roaring as he smacked his thigh. "I have to say, sweetheart," He said in between gasping for air, "You're the only wife who wouldn't want diamonds."

I put my hands on my hips and stared him down like he was a pest, "You're the only husband who would spend a fortune on a single ring!" I swear I would be okay if he bought me rings about a karat or more each, that way I would not mind having a few more.

"That's because you haven't factored in the proportions." Christian pointed out. "A normal man's 100k is my 0.001K." He said proudly, but there was nothing I could say because he had worked hard for every single cent.

"You're very rich." I said, my lips in a straight line.

"You say that like it's a bad thing." Christian's smile vanished, striding towards me as he pulled me into his chest. "I want to be rich so I can give you everything your heart desires."

"But all I desire is you." I said, nuzzling my nose into his chest and inhaling the familiar scent. "And I have you, don't I?"

He must have felt the shift in mood the same time I did, so he pulled away ever so slightly. Clasping my chin between his fingers, he tilted my face up to meet his concerned gaze. "Of course you do, Ana."

"Good."

"Are you going to be okay?" He asked, soft and weary. Christian was referring to Ethan's recent betrayal.

Ethan had known how much Elena threatened me, she was the source of so much insecurities and the seeds of doubt in my marriage. Yet, he had chosen to exploit this information that I had so trustingly shared with him. Even if he had loved me, doing so was a clear indication that he did not love me enough. He was willing to hurt me and never in my life had I ever thought Ethan had that in him. It scared me.

"Hey, hey, hey." Christian cooed, drawing me out from the sea that was my tumbled emotions. I found security in his grey eyes and held onto him tightly. "Don't brood, baby. I think the two of you just need some space for the time being."

"Try forever." I hissed, the anger directed at an absent Ethan.

Christian chuckled, "As happy as that would make me, you and Ethan apart will do you little good." Confusion spread through my mind and I stared up at him with a blank look, my eyebrows knitting together. "Baby, I get jealous because just like you need me, you depend on him too. I've told you this."

Of course he had, but I was not exactly thrilled that he was reexamining it. The annoyance in my bloodstream must have been the taste in Christian's mouth when I had tried to explain Leila's motivations. Charma was a bitch. I sighed and conceded, "But I want to depend on you more, I don't need Ethan. I need you."

His eyes tingled up with love, a light so bright that it made me smile. "I love it when you say things like that."

"I can tell." I beamed, leaning up on my tiptoes to plant one on the tip of his nose.

"Do you feel okay? I mean besides the obvious, but will you be..." His fingers caught a stray tendril of hair and tucked it behind my ear caressingly. "Okay?"

"I guess I will." I had no certain answer, pressing my palm agains his chest and reassuring myself that at least I would always be certain about one thing.

Christian sighed and kissed my forehead, "I'm not going to work today."

"What's the excuse this time, CEO?" I attempted to mock him, lifting my eyebrows in a reprimanding manner.

Christian gave me the most adorable pout I had ever seen, only Shrek's Puss in Boots could rival the level of irresistibility I was looking at now. "Because the love of my life has taken a blow to her spirits and NEEDS me by her side."

It made me smile and I caught the tip of his pout with my fingers, "Unlike this bum of a CEO," I gestured to him, " this CEO," I gesticulated to myself, "will be going for work."

"If it makes you happy, sweetheart." Christian said, completely angelic. I was just about to call his bluff when he winked at me and added, "I'll come along."

"What is this?" I giggled, "Bring your husband to work day?" The idea of bringing Christian to work was horrifying. Not because be would scrutinize my work methodology and processes, but rather, because it was symptomatic of him to scare off any potential business men who were vaguely good looking. Not to mention, he would throw all the women in my office into an infatuated daze. Maybe even the men.

It would be... Effectively, a very unproductive day.

"Oh come on, Ana." Christian pleaded, his full blown pout in perfect view and intensifying by the second. "I'm already dressed."

I knew what he was trying to do. It was really very sweet of him and I found myself beaming at my adorable husband who was distracting me from the predicament. "Will you behave?"

"I'll be good," He lifted his pinky in the air, "Pinky promise."

It warmed my heart and there was little I could do to say no. Today would be no doubt a wrestle for me to assert my presence as Mrs Grey to keep all those other women, single or not, in line. "Alright, let's go before you make me late."

"Me? Us? Late?" Christian cried, "No dear, the rest of them are simply early."

"Good morning, Mr Grey, Mrs Grey." Taylor greeted with a broad smile as we exited the bedroom. Luke was leaning against the counter, casually horsing about with a giggling Gail.

"Morning!" I chimed and Christian gave him a friendly nod.

"Shall we head off?"

"Yes, but we'll take one car today." Christian said, fumbling with his cuff links. I stepped forward to help him get them right.

"Sir?" Taylor was confused, wondering if his boss had suddenly turned Eco-friendly.

"Thank you, dear." Christian planted one on the side of my cheek. "We're going as interns to Ana's office today."

"Alright, sir." Taylor smiled and Luke straightened up, knowing today he had to be on his best behavior.

I have Luke a slight smirk behind Christian's back, mouthing, "Let's try not to get into any trouble."

"This way." Christian veered my path as I started for the lobby. "We're taking the staff lift."

"Why?" I was suddenly in distress as Christian gently coaxed me into the lift with Luke and Taylor. "Did something happen?"

Christian's lips turned into a grim line, "Nothing that you should be bothered with, sweetheart. I'll take care of it."

"Christian..." I started to grumble. "Don't make me pull out our wedding vows."

He shot me a look of mock fear and horror, "Not again!" This sacred commitment had been turned into a weapon time and time again for me to get what I wanted. "It's just the Ethan... Situation yesterday stirred up the paparazzi and news agencies."

At that moment, I wished I had not asked. A cloud of annoyance at myself sprouted through my chest."I'm really sorry."

Christian sighed, "I don't want to tell you these things because they upset you." He shifted himself so he could cuddle me into his side. He kissed my temple, which was oddly calming, "I love you, Ana."

"I love you too." I kissed him where I could reach without having to lean on my tiptoes.

If Taylor and Luke were uncomfortable, they did not voice out any complaints. It then occurred to me that maybe Christian advocated them taking a different lift precisely to save them from extreme discomfort from having to stand within our proximity. Either way, they must have gotten used to it by now.

Thankfully, my office building was unlike Escala. Escala had been crowded with reporters trying to get a glimpse of us, but they had missed the sleek black car that had slipped out from the back. They had not planted any reporters at my office. Suddenly, I was grateful that Christian had insisted coming along. I was useless under the spotlight.

"Good m-" Giselle had started to say, but upon meeting the gaze of the ever-so-distracting Christian Grey, both my receptionists lost the ability to speak.

"Good morning to you too." I tried to help them out. Christian made my attempt futile by dropping them a panty-stripping smile. I grabbed my husband by his tie and hauled him into the lift, the look of surprise painted his face as I jerked him forward to unify our lips.

I pressed him up against the metallic cold wall of the lift, not needing to see where I had to press. The lift shot up into the sky as I deepened the kiss, which Christian responded to fervently by grabbing my buttocks and grinding me against his thigh.

"Chhhhristiannn." I slurred, in partial ecstasy. He nipped my neck just as the lift 'dinged' and I stepped back, out of reach.

An amused look crossed Christian's expression and he raised his eyebrow in question. I shrugged, "Just marking my territory." Climbing out of the lift, Christian smacked my butt loudly.

"Good morning Mrs…" Claire had begun to greet but just like the receptionists, lost her words in shock at Christian's unannounced arrival.

"Ah, Claire!" Christian greeted, having never physically met my assistant. At the side where I knew he could not see, I rolled my eyes as he scrutinized every inch of my assistant. "It's great to finally meet you." He extended a courteous hand out to Claire, who visibly chose the hand with the wedding ring.

I laughed. Claire's personality was precisely why I had chosen to employ her. Readjusting her position to encompass both Christian and I, Claire folded her hands on her skirt, "Mrs. Grey, Jonathan Davis is here."

"Am I late?" I flustered, flicking my watch up to view.

"No, he's early." Claire stated.

"Jonathan Davis?" Christian questioned.

Ignoring his errant jealousies, I smiled at Claire, "Where did you put him?"

Claire nodded at me and gestured towards my office, "I hope you don't mind, the conference room is under construction at the moment and wou-"

"Claire, you know I trust every decision you make." I stopped her before she could waste her breath. "Thank you very much. Could you maybe babysit Mr Grey here while I-"

"That's hilarious," Christian's eyes were narrowed in annoyance, "We both know I'd love to meet this… Jonathan Davis."

"Right." I stated, barely offering Christian a glance, instead I focused my attention on Claire, "Shall we?"

With Christian trailing at the back, Claire and I led the way into my office. Jonathan Davis, one of the key investors in our company today, was seated casually across my office chair. Approaching him from behind, I could see his ruffled golden hair and the tea Claire had thoughtfully placed before him.

"Mr. Davis." I greeted.

His green eyes met mine as he turned and then filled with confusion as they fell on Christian. Either he was surprised that Christian was here or he was tripping over my husband's good looks. Like the gentleman he was, Davis rose to his feet and offered his hand to mine. Before I could take it, Christian beat me. Accomodating, Davis forced a smile, "I didn't know I'd be meeting you today, Christian."

"Well, my wife demands to come to work and I accompany her to find you here." At his tone, I knew that they were familiar with each other. "Pestering my woman are you?"

Davis chuckled, but it barely reached his eyes. "Who would dare to take what belongs to Christian Grey?"

From the corner of my eye, Claire gave me a look that read 'Proceed with Caution'. Whatever rivalry these two had in the past, I could not let it jeopardize my company. "Christian, this is Jonathan Davis, one of Grey Publishing's major investors."

"Major investors?" Christian clarified in a tone that could be translated into 'How had I let this slip past me?' No doubt, he was going to give me trouble for this. But I never saw the need to report anything at work to Christian even though he was technically my boss.

"Yes," I reached for their linked palms and gently broke the connection before bones could be broken. "He helped to revive the company at a time where literary prowess failed us all." I shot Davis a kind smile, which he accepted with one of his own.

"Well, I wouldn't invest 10 billion in a company I did not have faith in." Davis justified himself, emphasizing a little too much on the amount he had invested.

Christian's eyebrows furrowed in annoyance, "10 billion you say? Whatever happened to your own string of companies? Including the one you attempted to poach from me? Where would you possibly get the funds?"

Ah, so this was another one of Christian's merger and acquisition problems. I knew that bringing Christian to work was going to be a chore, but I was not expecting this. Jonathan Davis had been the perfect client to work with and had been nothing more than an angel. I would be damned if Christian forced me to drop him all together, Grey Publishing would be crippled.

Stepping up to the challenge, Davis pushed his chest out ever so slightly. "I have more money than you can imagine."

Knowing this was going to just explode in my face, I grimaced at Claire to send her a signal I knew she would receive crystal clear. "Mr Davis," Claire chimed as she took a few steps forward, "The meeting room is ready, may I lead you there?"

Jonathan Davis shot another glance, dripping with venom, at a highly irritated Christian. But upon looking at Claire and myself, his glance softened and he nodded at her, "Of course, thank you."

Waiting for both of them to leave, Christian closed the door behind them. "Christian…" I groaned, "This is why I won't bring you to work."

His back was still turned to me, "Ana, how long?"

I felt the air leave my rib cage as I grew alarmed at what Christian was implying, "How long?"

"How long has he been an investor." He clarified, his tone steady.

"Just when I seized the role as new CEO. Why?" I had no idea where Christian was heading with this.

"Have you been meeting him often?"

"Where are you going with this?!" I grew defensive, positioning my hands on my hips in question.

Christian spun on his feet to meet me head on, "Answer me, Ana."

"There's nothing going on between us, Grey. We only meet for business." How could he even begin to think anything of that sort?

Noticing the emotions playing out each other on my face, Christian shook his head at me. "Ana, I'm not questioning you're loyalty."

"It sure as hell sounds like that." I snapped.

"Ana," Christian reached for my hands, holding them tenderly in his own. "Remember the bitter fiasco with Elena over the Asian assets?" I nodded, my mind blanking out at what he was about to link Davis to. "Jonathan Davis was the man on the job."

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	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14: Business Proposals

**Author's Note!**

**Hello fellow readers, I'll be ceasing FSOGoodbye until around November to December due to my inability to juggle two stories at once and my highly demanding academic life. Please do understand :) However, if any of you are interested in co-writing or just taking over FSOGoobye all together, do PM me. And forgive me if the upcoming chapters are a bit off, I've never been pregnant (Thank God, I'm only 17) and I only know the things I research on. :) Thank you.**

I was in deep trouble.

_As usual, My inner goddess pointed out._

The Asian crisis was still fresh in my mind. Christian had gone nuts about it and it had taken me into one of the lowest points of my life. To nobody's surprise, Elena had been behind it all. After getting married, I had thought that we had left her and all her shanningans in the past. Apparently not.

There had come a low time where Grey Publishing was on a roller coaster down into an abyss. A time when the staff had begun to quit in anticipation for the demise of my company. It had given me a massive headache as I had tried to think of solutions, any and every, that I could take to revive the business.

Speculation was a nasty devil. It spread through the company like wildfire. The sales had been dropping exponentially seeing that the most important staff, the ones vetting the books to be published, failed us by choosing the wrong things to invest in. Our revenue had dipped and I was soon forced to cut pays.

It must have been fear at that time. Christian had given me Grey Publishing as a post-wedding gift, planting it into my hands. He had had such high expectations and hopes for me, constantly telling me that he knew I could do it. Unknowingly, he had put so much pressure on my shoulders to the extent that I did not want to come up short.

Christian had been on a business tour around the world for two weeks, the longest we had ever been away from each other. I did not want him to perceive me as weak and did not want to alarm him by withdrawing such a large sum from our own personal account. I did not want him to realize how I lacked the same CEO capabilities that he had so naturally possessed.

I could feel the company Christian had bought slipping through my fingers. The fear was eating me inside out and with the lack of physical support from Christian being away so long, I was desperate for any solution except the ones that would implicate him.

A major restructuring was needed. I had to rebuild this company starting from the bottom up. I needed to fire our current employees who were doing a shitty job picking the books, review those in charge of marketing... The list had been so long that I was losing my mind.

Out from no where, Jonathan Davis had descended from the heavens and appeared in the lift as we were heading up.

"Rough day?" His green eyes softened with concern.

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair, "Extremely."

He ran his fingers through his own locks and offered me a smile, "Anything I can do to help?"

Half-crazed and assuming he was just another one of my staff or a random intern, I shook my head at him. "Unless you happen to have a huge lot of gold sitting somewhere," I joked, exhausted.

The man had shrugged, "Actually, I'm on my way to your CEO to ask if she'd be willing to let me invest in the company."

"My CEO?" I was confused.

"Yes, a Ms Anastasia Steele I believe." The man clarified, flicking through his iPhone to catch my name right. "I spent eons looking for this very publishing firm, only to find out that it was renamed."

"Grey Publishing." I said, barely believing my ears. "Why would anyone want to invest in this firm?" I had meant to whisper to myself, but in this metallic lift, it had bounced right off the walls and into the man's ears.

He laughed, a careless chime and smiled broadly at me. "I have a tendency to scout out potential firms, mostly those not listed, invest a large sum of money and within the year, withdraw it all after the returns are high enough."

"What kind of investment strategy is that?" I had said, never before hearing such an unorthodox methodology.

"One that pays well." The man replied with a confident beam that resembled the one Christian always wore when he talked about money, pointing to his watch that was clearly the same line Christian bought his from. The lift 'dinged' as we reached my office level. The doors opened, "Well, this is me."

I was breathless, my entire being desiring to jump on this impeccable opportunity within the next millisecond. "This is me too," I forced myself to be charming, "I'm Anastasia Steele."

Christian folded his arms, clearly in disdain. "Why did you take 10 billion from him?" Even though he was not yelling, there was adequate bitterness in the tone to convey his annoyance.

He had offered 10 billion but I had only taken 10 million, "I took 10 mi-"

"Why did you take it from him Ana?" Christian interrupted, "I'm not asking how much you took."

"The company was sinking!" I said, exasperated.

Christian clenched his jaw, "I asked why you took it from Jonathan Davis!" His patience had clearly worn out.

"I don't understand the question." I whispered.

His eyes were an enraged grey, the flames scorching. "You couldn't think of anyone else to take money from? Money that belongs to you as well?!" Christian raked his fingers through his hair in absolute annoyance, "I can't even... We're not exactly hurting for money. Anastasia, I'm loaded. I can't even begin to see your logic!"

I could feel myself shrinking. Suddenly, there was a quiet, almost timid knock on the glass door. "Mrs Grey, Mr Davis is waiting."

Christian squeezed his eyes shut, trying to tolerate his justified annoyance at me.

"I'm sorry."

"You go in there and tear the contract in half." Christian snapped. It surprised me to know that Christian was still allowing me to interact with Jonathan. "He's not dangerous in any physical way, just that he had been one of the many of Elena's tools to getting what she wanted." Christian clarified, " I just need to figure out what he's trying to do, I don't think this is a coincidence."

"He's trying to harm you?" I squeaked, barely able to grasp the idea that I had been the one to let the enemy into Christian's impenetrable fort.

Christian squeezed the arch of his nose, "Even if he was, I hardly doubt he could even scratch me." His eyes flashed up to meet mine, "What kind of contract was it?"

I grimaced, "An unorthodox one."

"Un...orthodox?" Christian raised his eyebrows in question.

I swallowed, "He didn't have many issues, all he asked for is full asset liquidity and.."

"Please tell me you signed on this?" Christian was frustrated. "Davis' is a sneaky one and if it's not on paper..."

"I did." I put my hands up in the air. "We did."

"Give it to me." Christian commanded.

I waved Claire forward, "Claire please, could you?" Claire nodded at me, heading towards the locked glass cabinet where I kept all my legal documents.

"Mean while, Ana," Christian heaved a sigh like there was a heavy boulder weighing on his chest, "Go to Davis and break it off. Make it haste and come back to me."

Of course I will. "You're not coming?"

"I have a phone call to make." Christian narrowed his eyes at me. "Multiple."

I hated this distance between us. Letting go of my pride, I took three brave strides towards a fuming Christian. Part of me turned cold as he seemed to close himself, but I was not letting that discourage me. I had made the mistake and I needed him to know that I was sorry. Closing my eyes so I would be blind to any rejection, I wrapped my arms around his waist and leaned into his chest.

The effect was instant, his rigid structure softened and he wrapped his arms around me. Resting his chin at the top of my head, he sighed. "I'm not angry at you, Ana. I'm angry at myself from not realizing that you needed the help in the first place."

Christian had resorted to blaming himself for my irrational behavior once more. "I didn't want to burden you in addition to your business tour and I..." How on earth do I phrase what I needed to tell him?

Christian's lips brushed the crown of my head as he tightened his grip on me, "You can tell me anything."

Sucking in a steadying breath, I tried to muster enough courage. "I wanted to show you that... I was good enough for you..."

Christian was not at all shocked. Taking a small step back, he coaxed my chin up to meet his gaze. It was saturated with understanding and love, "You're more than enough for me. I'll say it as many times as you need me to, Ana."

"But I was losing the business and I thought you'd realize how incapable I was, I tried to salvage it with-"

"Ana," His tone was tender and caring, "I gave you this CEO position so that there would be one more aspect in your life that you can depend on me to nurture you in."

In other words, the position of CEO was something I could never rely on Ethan for help in. I could see the logic in it. I had misread Christian all the way, he was not expecting me to meet the bar immediately, but rather wanted my journey towards perfection to be one where he could guide me through. It was so... Christian. How could I have missed that?

"I didn't want you to leave me." I said, getting it off my chest.

"Death do us part, baby." Christian brought my wedding ring up to his lips to reassure us both. "I'm sorry I didn't realize how tough your job had become... Sometimes I just get so immersed in work, it cocoons me."

It was not his fault. I knew that he had taken that business tour as a last resort to secure all his firms. It was vital that the various people sitting on the different boards meet their boss physically at least once a year. We had intended to go together but I had caught a slight fever and Christian had insisted I stayed behind under the care of Gail.

"It's not your fault, I should've said something." Without a doubt, Christian would've helped.

He leaned in to nuzzle my lips against his own, "We made a mistake and we'll learn from it. Settle things with Davis my way, please."

Kissing him back lightly, I conceded. As Christian whipped out his phone to find the loophole in our security system, I followed a patient Claire towards the spare meeting room. It had not been fully set up yet and Jonathan was still lounging in the main chair.

"I'm sorry to keep you waiting." I said as Jonathan stood up to grasp my hand.

His gaze softened, "Are you alright? Did I do something to get you into trouble?"

Now he was trying to play innocent, "Please take a seat, Davis." The man lowered himself back down and I took the seat on his left, "Look, I don't know what game you're playing but it ends now."

He crossed his legs and leaned back in his seat, trying to give off a vibe that he was perfectly at ease. "Game, Ms Steele?"

That was one of the only things that bugged me about Davis. "I've told you, I'm Mrs Grey to you. Why won't you call me Mrs Grey?!"

I watched as his lips turned up into a little smile, "The very first name card you have me stated Ms Steele and Ms Steele to me you will be."

I hated how that rhymed. "What are you trying to do?" I leaned forward and married my eyes at him, "Because Christian will never let you harm any of our companies, as you have experienced over your squabble with the Asian companies."

"Feisty," Davis said, clearly enjoying this. "Just that I had zero interest in any of your companies, even then, I only poached those companies because I was begged to."

"Elena begged you?" I could hardly imagine her pleading little face, having always been so confident.

Davis nodded and then shrugged, "She was an acquaintance that kept coming up on my cell phone until I gave her what she wanted."

"What did you want?" I was more interested to know. This was going to be my repayment to Christian for lacking any sense of good judgement in the matter.

Davis rose to his feet and smoothened out his tie, taking a relaxed stroll towards the glass windows to peer down on the city below. "Elena's determination to bring Christian's career down peaked my interest. She offered herself in... So many... Ways..." I felt a shiver run down my spine, "in return, but not to worry," Davis chuckled, "I'm really not that kind of guy."

"Christian's getting all dirt on you as we speak, so you better explain faster." I folded my arms to signal that I was unbothered by his slight allusion to Christian.

Davis turned to raise his eyebrows, "If I didn't want him to find me, why would I have used my real name all this while? I never lied, never hid and never done anything illegal to prevent him from realizing my presence."

This was confusing me and Davis knew it, he walked back towards me with a proud smirk, " It's your husband's fault that he missed how... Deep I am with his wife already."

"What?" The way he said it put me in an alarmed mode.

"I wanted to know what Elena saw in Christian and why she wanted him so badly... So I did my homework and caught sight of the prettiest little jewel I have ever seen..." Davis winked at me, "The luxurious Ms Anastasia Steele that immediately caught my eye... So I did more homework and found out that your most recently acquired company was in trouble."

His words took my back to the lift incident where we had 'met'. He had pretended not to know who I was. Why?

"And then I thought to myself," He pressed his index finger against his chin. "If Christian was here, he would have never let the company dip at all... And then I realized," He snapped his fingers, "He's away on the annual world tour!"

"You come across as a stalker, I hope you know that." I said with an injection of bitterness and sourness into my tone. "I don't think you're a threat to anyone but yourself, do you need a psychiatrist?"

"Wait for me to finish, will you?" Davis laughed care-freely, not a man who was caught.'"I knew you had little experience as a CEO and if I stepped in to help... Wouldn't that make me, kind of like your... Hero?"

"You want to be my hero?" I found my mind drawing blanks, unable to comprehend where he was going with this.

Davis nodded, "I have nothing against Christian Grey except for the fact that he's taken what I desire. Of course, I was initially upset when I found out you were married... But that won't stop me."

"You desire me?" My eyebrows furrowed. "That's what this is all about?"

He nodded.

"You weren't planning to take our company down?" He shook his head. "You weren't trying to kidnap us or anything?" He shook his head. "You're just after... Me?!" He nodded innocently.

And all of a sudden, this was just to funny, I threw my head back and erupted into a fit of laughter. Completely and entirely relieved that I had done nothing wrong except to allow someone interested in me to get closer to me.

"You're laughing at me?" He was incredulous, in complete disbelief.

"I'm sorry," I tried to stifle my laughter with my hands, "You're wasting your time... I'm perfectly and happily married... I'll never look for another." I waved my wedding ring in the air.

Jonathan Davis shook his head at me, "If you are happily married, you wouldn't have introduced yourself as Ms Steele."

It was my turn to shake my head at him, "Only the very first time, I was still unused to my new title which I used subsequently." Christian had made sure to 'casually' give me a whole stack of new name cards with my name as 'Mrs Anastasia Grey'.

"And we wouldn't be meeting so often if-"

"No no, you've mistaken. It was only ever for professional reasons," I told him, "Thank you Mr Davis for your time and resources, but I think it's best if we call it quits."

"Quits?" He sounded offended.

"I'm almost done paying you back and I think it would be b-"

He did not want to let me finish, clearly annoyed at what I had just said. "What? You mean Christian would think it would be best."

"That's not what I said." I began to rise to my feet to level him physically.

Suddenly, the most sexy voice radiated through the room. "But it's what she meant." Jonathan and I turned to find Christian leaning against the door like a sex god, hands stuffed into his pockets. "Mr Davis, the remaining money has just been transferred into your account. Please, take your leave."

Jonathan instantly straightened up, thrusting his chest out at the presence of the alpha male. I observed as Jonathan strutted towards Christian and they came chest to chest. Through gritted teeth, Jonathan growled, "Don't expect me to let her go as easily as I let those assets go."

Christian smirked, "You're welcome to try your hand at her but she's mine... Both outside..." He turned to me and licked his lips, "And in." Reflexively, my hands flew to my stomach that was beginning to curve with motherhood.

In a split second, everything changed. There was a tearing pain that ripped through my abdomen and my loving caress turned into a clutching grip as I screamed. The shock blasted through Christian's beautiful grey eyes as he shoved an immobilized Jonathan backward, trying to reach for me before I could fall. "Christian..." I panted as the pain throbbed in uncomfortably in the back of my ears. "The... Baby..."

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	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15: Miscarriages**

**Author's Note!**

**Oh look! This one came in early. Enjoy everybody (: AND HAVE A GREAT SUMMER.**

"How's our baby, Christian?" My voice was weak, etched with worry and concern for the child. I squeezed his palm and kept feeling at my stomach, as if searching for any forms of life. Christian's expression was grim and bleak, I was so sure that I had lost him. "Ch-ri-stian?" I began to choke on my own tears.

With gentle brushes, he brought his lips down to swipe away my falling tears as he lifted me out of the cot and into his arms, holding me tight against his chest.

"Chr-" Grace began to protest.

"Give us a minute, mom." Christian pleaded, his head against the top of mine as his arms hooped around my thighs.

The room was quiet with the sound of my sobbing as I leaned into his chest, forcing myself to swallow my tears. There was a quiet click of the door and I knew we were alone. Both Dr Greene and Grace had been by my side as I stirred, neither expressions giving way a single thing.

The pain spread through my chest as I realized that my child was gone. It had depended on me to protect him and cherish him, yet, I had let his tiny little precious life slip through my fingers in a heartbeat. A heart beat. Something he now did not have. I wrapped my arms around Christian's neck for support, pressing my eyes into the crook of his neck.

"Ana," Christian was about to say the unthinkable, "Please don't panic... Your stress levels are too high. Calm down, baby." Even in the evenness of his tone, I could still hear the torture behind them. He was going to be the one to deliver the bad news, yet, he was struggling to find the right words.

"I'm sorry..." I whimpered, my words muffled by his skin, "I should have taken better care of myself..."

"An-"

"Pl-ease don't." I cried, the tears falling faster and stronger than the Nigeria Falls could. "Please don't say it..." My eyes were turning sore and I imagine the million of ways I wanted myself to die as a punishment for losing this life. "I can't handle... I can't live through a mis..." My breath cut short as the word tried to leave my mouth. "-carriage."

Christian's arms began to put some distance between us, gently tugging at my arms to release him. Many times I had toyed with the idea of an abortion, to remove this child in a fight to save our marriage. Never would I have thought that I would not have a choice, that my deepest darkest wish had been granted. The irony of it all was that Christian had begun to accept the baby and yet, the folly of me had lost the child.

I would never be able to face Grace again or any other of the Greys for that matter. Kate Kavanagh, most recently Mrs Kate Grey, was the only one I wanted to speak to. She always seemed to know the right things to say. I wanted her by my side. I wanted her now.

In this moment, I hated that I had grown up. I resented that I had gotten married and gotten pregnant, had the chance to have a child but lost it. All I wanted was to go back to the times I myself was a baby in my parents' arms, never having to think of life or death and even being responsible for killing the brittle soul that had been the essence of my child.

"I... R-really wanted..." I choked on my own tears, "M-m-my b-baby."

Even my inner goddess had nothing to say, kneeling quietly by a new tombstone in the darkest of colours, no doubt mourning the loss of who Christian and I had spent so long bickering over.

I felt his lips touch my eyelids and as he pulled away, my eyelids fluttered open. Though blurry, I could see the worry and fear that tainted his beautiful grey eyes... Grey eyes that would have been imprinted in our child's... My breaths came up short and I began to heave, close to hyperventilation.

"Ana?" Christian's voice kicked up a few octaves, his hands coming to frame my face. "I need you to breathe, Ana, look at me."

The emptiness within my chest echoed the hollow within my womb, I felt myself falling into a pit of darkness that began to gnaw me from the inside out. I did not deserve Christian's love, his devotion and care. I had wrecked his life with a child, first by giving him one and then by taking away one.

"ANA!" Christian hollered, realizing that he was losing me as my breaths got shorter and shallower.

Immediately, Dr Greene and Grace burst into the room. From the corner of my eyes, I saw Luke and Taylor hovering by the entrance, anxiously peaking in. "Mr Grey," Dr Greene cautioned, trying to pry me out of his hands, "Please give her to me."

Christian grip tightened and his grey eyes searched mine," Ana please! Calm down, I need you to breathe baby, I love you. Listen to my voice, Ana!" Patches of white marred my vision along the blurry edges.

"Christian, it's going to be too late!" Grace was urgent, her hands coming between both Christian's and my chests.

"ANA THIS IS BAD FOR OUR BABIES!" Christian exploded, shaking me slightly as if trying to wake me from a bad dream. "YOU'RE STRESSING OUR BABIES! PLEASE STOP!"

Baby? Babies? I heard myself think. My consciousness had already begun to float up and away from my body. What kind of sick joke is this?!

"Listen to me, Ana," Christian's warm hands stroked my cheeks, "We have twins."

"T-t-t-" I stuttered, forcing my aching lungs to function normally.

Christian nodded, "Twins, Ana! Growing inside you. Our twins."

"I di-" Confusion swept me like the Red Sea did the Israelites. "Mi-s-c-"

"No baby," Christian cooed, " A threatened miscarriage only. They're still growing. Two, Ana, Two. And right now, they need their mom to breathe." I felt the tears of relief tumble down my cheeks as my breathing began to slow and return to normal.

"Oh thank God!" Grace sighed, stumbling back slightly as Dr Greene caught her.

Christian's smile was what brought me back down to earth, his left palm slipping downwards to caress my abdomen... Still rounded. "Dr Greene scanned you when you came in, Ana, we have twins."

* * *

"Congratulations, Mr and Mrs Grey, your babies are growing well and healthy." Dr Greene said with a genuine smile, one that seemed to light up both Christian and my world.

Even though his hands remained firmly on mine, Christian's beautiful grey eyes gazed lovingly at the growing children on the sonogram machine, as if never wanting to look away. At fourteen weeks, our twins were so peaceful in their bed of water, their thumbs already in their mouths by the looks of it.

We had come a long way over this past month, barely scraping past a threatened miscarriage. The excess stress I had put on myself over work any my constantly turbulent relationship with Christian had almost taken the life of our growing children.

I could still remember Christian's heavily beating heart against my own as he pressed me to his chest like the end of the world was near. It had taken Luke barely two minutes to scramble us to the hospital and right into Dr. Greene's waiting arms. By then, I had begun to spot, dropping both Christian and I into a disarray of panic.

* * *

"Mr Grey, I think it's best if you stand back." Dr Greene had suggested, almost a command, wary that he would complicate things.

Christian gripped onto my hands as the doctor sat between my legs, "No chance. What's going on?"

"Mr Grey..."

"I said what?!" Christian pretty much blared.

In answer, Dr Greene removed my underwear and placed them at the table beside us. The seductive white lace Christian had gifted me from Victoria Secret was now stained an angry red. My mind drifted to the idea that some part of my child was now dangling on that fabric. Momentarily, it became too much and I had lost consciousness.

* * *

"I must commend your flawless attendance in all pre-natal courses, Mr Grey," Dr Greene laughed, "Instead of merely sending one of your men like you did the first time."

But Christian was barely listening, his mind half way around the world as he watched our child's little heart best ever so slightly. Dr Greene could miss his anxiousness, but I had seen it frame his face for the past few weeks. He had been a loving husband and a cautious father, constantly insisting I visit Dr Greene every alternate day. Best of all, he would always accompany me, whether he was busy or not. That was what I loved best.

"Mrs Grey, you've done a great job recovering from the threat," Dr Greene stated as she began to clean the liquid off my stomach. "But still remember to get ample rest, you know what to eat and what not to eat, especially no work for you."

"Of course." I said, timidly. I even had to give up wearing my high heels for the twins.

"Any morning sickness yet?" Dr Greene asked kindly.

I smiled at her, "Rarely." Christian had made it a point to go into work during the late morning, just in case I had morning sickness. He would carry me to the toilet and hold my hair, stroke and sing to me until I was all better. It was heartwarming. Honestly, I was upset that it did not happen more.

"That's very lucky of you. Well, if there's nothing else, I'll see you two... The following day." She smiled sweetly, "Even though there really is no need, Mr Grey."

I squeezed his hand to bring him back to us, "He needs the reassurance."

"Of course," Dr Greene nodded, "The first pregnancy is always the hardest."

"Thank you, Dr Greene." Christian offered his hand out to her and then began to help me off the chair and onto my feet.

"Thank you, Mr Grey."

We stepped out of the office and into the waiting room where the other two fathers were anxiously staring at the clinic door. With Taylor and Luke as much as companions as they were watchdogs for Christian, it was as if these two Greys were growing up with three fathers.

Christian wrapped his arm around me and drew me into his side as we approached the standing men, "The twins are getting stronger."

Taylor and Luke broke into bright smiles. "Congratulations, Mr and Mrs Grey," Taylor said, Luke's eyes resting tenderly on my baby bump. We had begun to think of names for our boys, to which I had suggested Luke, to which Christian had provided a stern 'No.'

Christian himself locked me into the car seat securely, seizing the middle seat himself so he could still cuddle with me as our men started the car. He kissed the side of my face, "Are you ready yet?"

He was referring to informing both our complete families, except Grace, that we were having children. Until now, I had my resistance towards it. "Christian, I can't even begin to imagine what they would feel if I miscarry."

Even though Christian had barred the good doctor from giving me any negative news, I was still connected to online sources which told me the blatant truth. Majority of threatened miscarriages ended in complete miscarriages. I did not want to take the chance of building up my parents' hope for a grandchild only to kill it. I myself had had gone through the pain.

"Sweet Ana," Christian's voice was soft as a feather against my tender heart, "You will have the babies and besides, I have more..." He chuckled seductively, "...resources."

Despite his seemingly cheery mood, I dipped my head and stared out at the rain. I felt Christian nip my earlobe with his teeth, sending huge waves of pleasure through my body. In normal circumstances, this worship would be okay, but it had been a month since Christian had made actual love to me and my body was sensitized.

Christian was cautious. The doctor had discouraged sex for the time being, to which he had lawfully abided to. It drove me crazy and my sex drive was always out of control, further aggravated by my pregnancy hormones. In addition, sex was hard to think about when your husband is the epitome of sex. Everything, every inch, of Christian Grey screamed sex.

At times, I had been driven out of my mind and when Christian was out to work or when I was taking a shower, I found myself wet in between my thighs. I had never fingered myself before, but desperate times had called for desperate needs, and I had tried it out. It was pleasurable but only temporarily satisfying, I needed the body of Christian Grey to impale me in order to be sated.

I closed my eyes and submitted myself to his teasing, feeling my groin begin to ache. His laughter rumbled my ear and he pulled away. "We're here."

"Christian," I sighed, almost protesting. But I did not want either Luke nor Taylor to hear me beg for sex from their boss, so I obediently allowed Christian to help me out of the car. After the scare, Christian had limited Luke to merely opening the door. He would rather be the one to help me out of the car even though it was really unnecessary.

The lift door shut and I knew I was going to lose it. The metal walls never failed in reminding me how he had slammed me up one and taken me. It had been so erotic and crazed. I swallowed as I felt the heat spread through my body and a dampness introduced itself to my groin. Christian had his arm loosely around my waist, his lips in a playful smile as he clearly understood what this lift did to my sex drive.

I tried to cover it up. Brushing my hair behind my ear, I forced a smile, "No work today?"

When he spoke, his voice sounded extremely low and sexy coarse. Whether it was him doing it on purpose or my mind playing tricks on me, I found my palms beginning to sweat. "I decided to work from home today and keep you company."

"Oh," I said, "Cool cool."

"Are you going to take a nap?"

"Oh, no." I shook my head, feeling all hot and bothered. "I'll probably... Watch some television or something."

"Okay, but change into something comfortable first."

I shot him the most incredulous look I could muster. Everything the man had bought to prepare me for maternity was expensively through the roof. The dress I was wearing right now felt like the finest cotton against my skin. "How is this not comfortable?"

Christian bit the bottom of his lip unknowingly, "Well, I meant something more... Open... You seem rather warm."

So he was aware of my crazed sex drive. I narrowed my eyes at him. I was surprised at how he had gone a month without sex. It was impossible for Christian as he was the type that lived on sex.

_That man has wicked self-discipline. My inner goddess rolled her eyes at his control in not touching me. _

The lift 'dinged' and I pretty much ran out of the lift in hopes of reducing the discomfort I was feeling. But it was useless. "Do you need me to help you change out?" Christian's voice was too seductive.

"I'm not changing out." I told him, trying to keep my own voice in check.

"Okay," Christian pecked my cheek, "I'll be in the office if you need me."

Of course I needed him! We strolled in opposite directions as I headed for the living room, nestling myself into the couch with its infinite number of cushions. Christian had invested in a pillow company purely so he could get the best quality pillows for me, lining our entire bed with them as well. Dr Greene had only briefly mentioned that pillows would help ease discomfort in later stages of the pregnancy.

"Crap," I sighed under my breath, feeling the moistness in my thighs. Do I need to pleasure myself again? How was that necessary when I had a husband perfectly capable of relieving me? It made me slightly mad and I jumped to my feet, stalking into his office.

Christian was leaning back in his chair, clearly expecting my arrival already. "Please take a seat," He gestured to the cushioned chair In front of his table. I did, the feeling providing me partial relief as it pressed against my groin. "How can I help you, Mrs Grey?"

"I don't feel like a Mrs Grey." I grumbled, folding my arms.

"Oh?" Christian was enjoying himself, resting his elbows on the table and putting his head in between his palms to look at me. "And why is that?"

Under his glare, I crossed my legs tightly, which made Christian's expression turn amused. "You know why!"

Christian shrugged, "Of course I do, but there really is nothing I can do about it, is there?"

"That's bullshit," I whined. "You have an incredible set of man parts you refuse to use." He arched his eyebrow in more amusement, a smile playing across his lips. "I'm starting to wonder if your sex drive died, because I must have missed his funeral."

Christian's mouth popped and he laughed, "No need to be feisty, Mrs Grey... And I assure you that the sex drive is still there, even more so now because of that baby bump of yours that's so... Erotic."

"Huh?"

"Ana, looking at the babies grow inside of you, I feel powerful, like I've created something beautiful... And it drives a primal... Beastial desire for your body within me."

It was my turn to drop my jaw, "Then why don't you take me?"

Playing with me, he smiled, "Take you where?"

I narrowed my eyes at him and rose to my feet. Clearly, I was not going to win. "Fine." I turned my back to him and stalked right out of the office, "I'll just take care of it myself."

"Yourself?" Christian's tone had shifted as I walked into the bedroom, slipping out of my dress. It was a tone of disbelief and slight annoyance as he followed me in, "You... Pleasure yourself?"

I shrugged as I grabbed a soft warm towel that Gail had prepared for my bath, "When your husband refuses to satisfy you, there's little one can do to get by."

"I've never seen you do it." Christian thought I was bluffing. He did not enjoy the idea that I had pleasured myself purely because he had always been the one to pleasure me. He had claimed my sex, even from my own hands. At least he thought he did.

"Half the time you're in your office the other half you're away at work." I headed for the toilet. "And most of the time, I needed sex."

"You do it in the bathroom? Standing up in the shower?" Christian's voice rose a few notches. "Do you know how dangerous that is?"

"In the bed too." I pointed out, stepping into the toilet and stripping myself. "I like living on the edge!"

"Ana..." Christian growled. "You never told me you fingered yourself."

"It just happened. No big deal, women do it all the time." I turned to smile at him, "You can return to work, I won't be needing your services right now."

"My services?" He was in disbelief. "You're gonna masturbate now? In the shower! And you expect me to leave?"

"Why of course," I was pushing all his buttons. "I'm beginning to forget your little man with my slender and long fingers."

And that was it for Christian. In one swift movement, I was in his arms as he carried me towards the bed. He lowered me gently onto the cushions and began to abuse my mouth, his tongue driving me insane as he teased me and nipped at my bottom lip. I could feel him growing between my legs, his groin pressed against mine as I wrapped my legs around him.

Christian bent over me, using his arms to support his weight, as he introduced me to a variety of kissing styles. I linked my hands around his neck and felt his crotch gently grind against mine. All of a sudden, I felt my below quiver and I let out a pleased sigh. Christian pulled away and gawked at me, "Did you just?"

I nodded, "I told you I needed you." I was partially sated. My fingers running down to his groin and holding him in my hand.

Christian chuckled, "No sex, Ana."

I pouted, "Come on. Dr Greene said she discouraged it four weeks ago, the babies won't mind." Christian carried me like I was a monkey, bringing me further up into the bed where more pillows were located. "Please?" I fluttered my eyelids at him, beginning to unbutton his shirt. His eyes fell shut and I quickly finished with his shirt, trying my luck with his pants.

He caught my hands and his eyes opened, a conflicted grey of emotions. "I've got a better idea."

"Let me guess... Celibacy?" I pursed my lips. "I think I just might steal a...Dildo from upstairs, don't you think?"

Christian's jaw dropped. He reached for my stretch mark cream and put a load on his palms, then very carefully helped me sit up. He positioned himself behind me as he began to massage my waist and stomach area. Spreading the cream all around the babies, he brought his lips to my neck and nipped. I let out a moan and leaned into him.

"That's right, baby." Christian growled against my skin.

With intense slowness, Christian let his fingers glide sensually up the sides of my body. Teasing and taunting, he finally made contact with my extremely tender breasts. They had grown since the last time he had seen me naked, something he now appreciated. His moisturized fingers massaged my breasts and I groaned, lost in the pleasure.

"Christian..."

He knew exactly what I wanted, brushing his fingertips against my nipples. The moisture in between my thighs became unbearable and I lifted my arms backwards to hold Christian's face, gripping his hair as he squeezed my nipples. First the left, then the right, then both... Then.. "Aaaahhhh." I let myself go and slunk against his perfectly sculpted bare chest. "I love you, Christian."

"As I love you, Ana." Christian chimed back with a chuckle.

"Why didn't you do this before? Instead of swearing me to complete physical purity for a month!" I pouted angrily, turning around so I could face him.

Christian smiled, "I didn't want to awaken any... Sexual desire within you. I didn't expect you to have a sex drive during pregnancy, Google said so."

"Damn Google." I cursed under my breath. "No sex though?"

Christian shook his head.

"Then how do we satisfy you?" I teased, licking my lips as I stared at his hard on. "Lean back, will you?" I was about to show him just how much of a sex goddess I was in the moment.

**Keep holding on; Avril Lavigne**

**Review please. It gives me great joy to read, especially extremely long ones, whether critiquing or praising. All is welcome (: I value your opinion.**


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16: Dead man Running

_The look in Christian's eyes were evidence enough._

_My pathetic self was willing to overlook the familiar brunette in our bedroom but could not ignore the face of guilt that he now wore. With my hands clasping our unborn children, protecting the sons he never wanted, I began to leave._

_Unlike the first time, Christian remained rooted in his position. He stuffed his hands into those denim jeans and frowned at the spiral of the situation, as if there was nothing to be done to fix it._

I woke, slowly sitting up in my unusually large bed. In the darkness, I felt for Christian, my fingers splaying out and reaching through the ocean of pillows. They came back empty and immediately, my eyes opened in confusion. I squinted at the clock.

It was 3.40AM in the morning and yet, Christian was nowhere to be seen. I grumbled at the quietness in our bedroom and the coldness on his side of the bed. We had both gone to sleep at 7.30, my usual Christian prescribed bed time, but somewhere along the way he had gotten up. The chilly surface of a bed was testament.

Where was he?

Carefully, I swung my feet off the bed and draped the blanket around myself. The material was heavy, but smoother than silk. I went in search of my husband's arms, stumbling through the living room that was dimly lit. Passing through the kitchen, my stomach grumbled at the idea of food.

My inner goddess rolled her eyes at my perpetual hunger and I sighed, hating the next time I would have to get on a weighing scale.

The light from the office caught my attention and I redirected my course towards it. Christian sat at his desk, leaning back in his leather chair with his phone pressed against his ear. His eyebrows furrowed at whatever was being told to him but softened as he caught sight of me.

Careful not to make any noise, I climbed into lap and cuddled against his chest. The office was way too chilly for his little tshirt and I pulled the blanket around us both. Christian pressed his lips to the back of my head, his arm encircling me. "Welch, I will call you back."

"That wasn't necessary." I whispered into his chest, content to just have him close to me.

"It is to me, baby." Christian reassured me as his now free arm cradled my growing belly. "Anything keeping you awake?"

I pouted, "My husband's absence from bed."

Christian laughed a little, "I caught my usual seven hour sleep so I decided to finish up a little work."

I snuggled closer into him, turning a little whiny at having to share my Christian with the entire world. "Why does Welch keep bothering you? Doesn't he have a life?"

"Baby," Christian chuckled care-freely at my possessiveness. "I have a feeling his wife is asking him the exact same thing about me."

I sighed at the thought, "I can relate." Twisting so I could look at him, Christian changed the position of his arms to give my back maximum support."We both sleep better with our husbands in our bed."

Christian caught my pout with his fingers, brushing over them lightly. "I sleep my best with you in my bed, Mrs Grey."

His grey eyes were saturated with an intense contentment, drawing me in slowly as I pressed my lips to his beautiful pair. This was the warmth I had missed in bed, the feel of my husband's arms around me and his silk soft and warm lips against mine. Ruining our moment, my stomach began to grumble.

"Mrs Grey," Christian scolded as he pulled away, "It seems I have to raise the quantity of food to feed you at every meal." I smiled at him. He usually did that with me blindfolded. My stomach grumbled once more."Are you hungry, Mrs Grey?"

Teasingly, I let my fingers run down his chest as I bit my bottom lip. "Not for food, Mr Grey."

The playful side of Christian was surfacing and he stood with me in his arms. I whooped, locking my arms around his neck praying for actual sexual intercourse this time. Christian had often satisfied me and tired me out with everything sexual except the exact sex itself. But today, today, I will make sure that I get to enjoy his body.

I squealed as we made it out of the office. Surprisingly, Christian put me down on the cool marble of the kitchen table. I leaned back and thrust my chest out, "Are you taking me here, Mr Grey?"

With the smile that never failed to light my world, Christian shook his head. "No Mrs Grey, I'm feeding you."

I pouted and shook my head, wrapping my legs around Christian and drawing him into me. He placed both his palms on my thighs in restraint as he tried to resist my seduction attempt. "As much as I want you, Ana."

"Dr Greene cleared sex! You heard the woman." I hissed.

Christian pursed his lips then without another word, he gently dislodged himself from me and turned to the kitchen. " Mrs Jones made some carbonara earlier. How does that sound?"

Lately, my cravings have been showing and so have my repulse refluxes. Onion was huge on that list. "Any onion in it?"

Christian shook his head, "Not even a little, Gail stopped buying them." He turned with the bowl and lifted the metal foil, his face lighting up like a little boy's on Christimas, " There's little bits of bacon!"

I laughed and smiled at my adorable husband. "That'll do."

As if I was a rival company who just agreed to merge with his, Christian beamed at me and chucked the bowl into the microwave. He leaned back against the marble as the bowl turned in its heat, mimicking my primal desire for everything Christian.

I decided to launch a different strategy to get what I wanted. "How's the baby?"

His right eyebrow rose in question and curiosity, "Aren't you carrying our baby and don't we have two?"

I pursed my lips, "No, those are mine. Yours is sitting on your desk."

Christian's lips tweaked up at the corner, "It takes two to make a baby and in this case, we have two." He made his way slowly to my side, sneaking his arms around my waist to caress my belly. "Don't be jealous of my work, it helps alleviate the panic I experience from becoming a father."

"I really wish you spend more time with me." I murmured, my hands clasping around his. "I don't sleep well without you."

Christian tensed and instantly, I hated myself for letting my tone give so much away. Very carefully, he spun me around so I was facing him. I looked away like a toddler caught red handed. Gingerly, he lifted my chin so I would have no choice but to meet his gaze.

The grey in his eyes were burning with worry, "What is it?"

I did not want to get into this with him. Not here, not now, not ever. The last thing I wanted was for Christian to think I doubted him. I did not. These stupid dreams just kept coming back, as if warning me that I was about to lose him.

Christian pursed his lips, "Tell me."

I sighed, exasperated. "I had a bad dream." His eyebrows furrowed, as if not comprehending that I had bad dreams too. "They're not as bad as yours... I promise."

He relaxed visibly, "Is it about me?" I nodded. "What is it?"

Meekly, I looked away once again. "You're with your..." I sighed, not believing that he was making me say this. "Subs."

The change in the atmosphere was swift, his mood darkening instantly. "How long?" It was barely a whisper.

Thankfully, the microwave beeped to signify my food was done. "Oh! Food!" I cheered over enthusiastically, leaping off the marble top but into Christian's waiting embrace.

His lips moved to my ear, "How long?" He demanded, insistent.

"A few weeks." Before he could say anything, I turned around to hug him tight. "I'm sorry, Christian."

"It's not your fault." Christian whispered, nuzzling the top of my head.

We stayed there for a long while before I remembered the pasta that was probably turning cold already. "Food." I reminded him and he hesitantly pulled away to retrieve it.

"Christian, I wholly and completely trust you." I told him genuinely. He grabbed a set of cutlery and set the plate down on the counter. "Christian?"

"Eat please." Christian said with a soft smile, gesturing at the food.

Obediently, I climbed onto the chair with his help. "Christian?"

It was symptomatic of him as a sudden change of emotion took me by surprise. He now bore a look of... Animalistic... Desire. I gawked at him as he licked his lips. "Eat." He leaned casually against the counter with a sexy aura, "Then I'd like to take you to bed Mrs Grey."

I gasped. My inner goddess having been sedated for far too long stretched her arms and winked at me, preparing herself for the fullness I was about to experience once more.

"Can we skip this? I'm not hungry anymore."

Christian smirked, tilting his head back in this gloriously sexy matter as he shook his head, "Our babies, Mrs Grey, are priority."

I pouted at him.

Christian sighed with a soft smile as he reached for the bowl, leaning against the counter, he twirled a bunch of carbonara and offered it to me. "Eat, Mrs Grey, your reward will be duly given."

"Yes sir," I said, giving him a seductive wink.

I heard it just as he felt it. My ears were already in tune to the buzzing of Christian's otherwise silent phone. Accommodating, I reached for the bowl to feed myself, giving him space to pick up the call. "Welch may be in love you, by the way." I teased, digging into the bowl.

Christian sighed heavily, "I'd reject it but it's not Welch." Before I could ask, he tilted the screen and I was greeted with Elliot's smirk.

Why was my brother-in-law calling this early in the morning?

"Elliot." Christian hissed, his face fifty shades darker than grey. This had better not be a prank call or Elliot would be sure to get deeply punished for it. Christian's lips flattened as he listened to what his brother had to say.

It was a good two minutes before I heard the crackling of Elliot's voice stop. Christian raised his eyebrows, "Are you certain that it's not a prank? College kids pull this crap all the time."

Instantly, there was a bark and a high pitch squeal as I assumed Kate took over the phone. Something was very wrong and I quickly put my bowl aside. Noticing my reaction, Christian shook his head at me, beckoning me to finish my food. "No, her phone isn't on her and I wouldn't have appreciated you calling her this early either."

Kate had tried to call me? Something was very wrong. I was sure of it.

Immediately, Christian resumed his business-like approach, "Kate, rest assured that I'll do everything but meanwhile, I need you to remain calm and not give in to any threats. Keep me updated."

In the same second that he hung up, Christian dialed again before I could inquire what was happening. "Welch." He spat. "I need you to run a trace. Yes. Mr Elliot Grey is forwarding you the picture now." Christian squeezed his eyes shut and kept his phone, tucking it aside.

"Christian?" I could hear the panic in my voice.

His eyes flashed grey, a bright and annoyed grey.

"What is it?" I whispered, reaching for him and finding his shoulders tensed.

Turning, he took my hands in his gently, bringing them to his chest. "Ana, I need you to remain completely calm or I will sedate you."

At his words, my heart fluttered at a hummingbird's speed. But I nodded in agreement.

"Ana, Kavanagh is presumed to have been kidnapped." Christian said with the straightest face he possibly could, as if waiting for a response.

The pop of my mouth echoed through the quiet house and I could hear my own mind draw a blank. Kavanagh. Katherine Kavanagh.

NO YOU DUMBASS. My inner goddess snapped.

The only Kavanagh we had now was Ethan ever since Kate married Elliot. I grimaced as my head dived into a Sherlock Holmes style inquiration about who, why and when was Ethan kidnapped.

"Hey, hey." Christian cooed, his hands shifting to cradle my face as he tried to reach out to me. "I'll handle this, Ana. Trust me."

I did trust him. "Isn't Ethan in school?"

Christian nodded at me cautiously, surprised that I had yet to explode. "Kate just received an anonymous video of Ethan chained up to a pole in some dark place. I've just got Elliot to forward it to Welch."

Immediately, my mind sprung back to the time where I had to trace Jack's moves in order to figure out who wanted to harm Christian. This was not similar as the threat was directed to Kate, but then again, Kate was married to Elliot and Elliot was Christian's brother so we must be related somehow. The thought alone sent chills up my spine as I fought back the reality, my head still placing Ethan in his dorm studying.

"Hey, don't." Christian reached for me, encircling me into his warm arms as he kissed the top of my head. "I don't need you to worry about this. Firstly, it might be a lame college prank and even if it's not, we can meet the ransom. Secondly, Welch is on it and," He stepped back so he could look at me, "Welch always delivers."

There was truth in what Christian was saying. But even so, my heart was beginning to beat out of sync at the mere thought of Ethan in danger. "Kate… must have called… I better go… check…" My voice was weak, half lost in these dangerous conceits as I jerked my thumb towards the bedroom.

Christian's grip on me tightened and his gorgeous grey eyes smoldered, "Anastasia, I don't want you to panic over this. It may not even be a real threat."

"Can they reach Ethan?" I heard myself probe.

Christian sighed heavily, "Kate's been trying for the pass hour and when the call kept failing, Elliot suggested they bring my expertise in. He could've just fallen asleep after pulling the prank, I don't want you to think about this."

"How can I not?" My voice was barely heard as my mind began to drift to the last time I had seen Ethan. It had been ugly. I had beaten him up after Christian had been through with him. "We're more than friends." I said before I could reconsider my words.

I was annoyed at my lack of discernment as Christian's jaws clenched at my words, "I am aware of that fact."

"Ch-." I tried to clarify myself.

"No, it's alright. This is not the right time to be focusing on that. Come," He said with a welcoming smile, "I think you should have some rest."

"I don't even know how sleeping is a possibility right now." I hissed a little too coldly and wanted to hit myself when Christian pursed his lips in response. "I'm sorry."

"You're pregnant, _my _pregnant _wife, _and I'll appreciate if you come to bed with me and try to get some rest." Christian was brief and straightforward, his request came across like a command.

Knowing that it was too early in the morning and I was probably incoherent on many levels, I could not and would not fight my loving husband. Instead, I mustered my most angelic face and nodded at him, taking his hand in mine.

As Christian led me to the bedroom, I could not help but wonder about the state of my friendship with Ethan. After years of flying sky high, it had hit rock bottom and we had left it there since the day I confronted him. The idea of never being able to retrieve that friendship, to try to fix that, haunted me.

I had constantly told myself to stop thinking about Ethan and instead, focus on Christian. We had been newlyweds and I could not allow Ethan to occupy my thoughts. I had decided that Ethan would always be there and we could rebuild what was lost after my marriage with Christian stabilized. However, that decision was now turning into one I regret as I realized the possibility of never being able to fight for Ethan ever again.

In a heartbeat, Christian had swept me off my feet. Literally. I squealed at the unexpected gesture and quickly quiet down as he placed me back on my side of the bed. Kissing me on my forehead, he lifted the covers and tucked me in. "Are you not coming?"

"I thought you slept better with me in bed?" Christian smirked as he shimmied out of his pants. "Your request is my command, b-. Ugh." Christian grimaced as the buzzing sound made itself apparent.

Once again, Christian pulled it out his pants and pressed it against his ears. "Welch."

As Christian got briefed, I tried to get rid of the nerves by clearing Kate's panic attack from my handphone. Grabbing it off the bedside table, I unlocked it to find probably a million missed calls from Kate's phone, Kate's house phone and even Elliot's. Next, there was a whole row of threats from Kate to burn down my house if I did not pick up.

It put me on edge as I began to scan through them, her panic spreading through me from the words she had chosen to use. Kate genuinely believed that Ethan had been kidnapped.

Out of place, an MMS message on one of the iMessage conversations presented itself on my screen. It had been buried in between Kate's text messages. I squinted at the bubble, barely able to make it out. Finally, as I tapped it, my face paled.

I must have left my time stamp on because as I saw the picture of Ethan's beaten face holding today's newspaper, the unknown number began to type. I gawked as a some white dots appeared in a small blue bubble on the bottom left of the screen. Ethan had been kidnapped and the picture was evidence enough.

Right on cue, Christian put down the phone and sighed. "Ana, Ethan's been kidnapped."

My phone buzzed in my hand as the unknown number had finished sending the text.

**"YES, MS STEELE, THIS HAS EVERYTHING TO DO WITH YOU."**


	17. Chapter 17

**Author's note!**

**As you read on from this chapter onwards, you will realize that I've been playing with the thesaurus. Hahaa. This is because I'm learning new words for the SATs and need to apply them to remember them! Bear with me!**

Chapter 17: Rubiks Cube

"What is it, sweetheart?" Having maintained a calm stance the entire way, Christian's was immediately worried.

I sat sprawled across the bed with my knees folded at the sides, my hand gripping my phone coldly. I could feel my fingers turn rigid and my palms begin to sweat as I shook my head at him.

"Ana?" He called, letting himself onto the bed and wrapping his arms around me. In answer, I lifted my phone to him. Christian's eyes narrowed. "FU*K."

With his arms still tender around me, soothing me from falling into an abyss, he dialed Welch once more. "It's internal. I need you over." He was feral, teeth clenching, "NOW."

Whatever rush I was feeling must have been from the hormones because usually lost in situations like these, today there was a surge of adrenaline and a pang of anger. Whoever threatened Ethan threatened me and my family because he is family, regardless of the mistakes that had separated us in the first place.

Mistaking my flush for panic, Christian dashed to my side in hope of calming me down. "Ana, don't worry about this." He kissed the little impression between my ear and jaw that sent tingles down my spine. "I'll handle it, you can trust me."

"Of course I trust you, Christian." I responded, wrapping my arms around his neck to reassure him.

Because they were the windows to his soul, Christian's eyes fell shut as he continued, "I know how much Ethan means to you and I don't want you to feel like I'm going to do this half-heartedly."

The corners of my lips twitched downwards as I realized how I tortured this beautiful man who was self-confident in all aspects of his life... except ...when it came to me. Cradling his face between my palms, I smiled at him softly. "I love you, Christian Trevylan-Grey. Do you know that?"

His slightly over long fringe flopped down and covered an eye, likening him to a child playing pirate. "Most of the time."

I threw him a look of mock horror and brushed his hair back. "Well, you best remember that."

He raised an eyebrow in confusion, "You're surprisingly calm."

"Maybe it's got something to do with the fact that I have a capable husband and worrying about something out of my hands won't get me anywhere but further from you." I said in all honesty. "And we both know how close I like to be to you."

The smile on his face reassured me that he was almost on board with my mood and he nodded, his arms encircling me a little closer to his chest as he lowered me to the bed. His lovely grey eyes smoldered, " You're not worried for Ethan?"

"Of course I am." I shrugged. "But Ethan's tough and seeing that the threat is directed at me with him as collateral, its pretty obvious that they'll bait me before they even think of harming him." That made me realize... "Could I have my phone back?"

Christian seemed puzzled at my logical state, but at the moment, I repeatedly told myself that panic was not the road to take. He felt down the side of his pants and produced my iPhone.

Pulling up the recent conversation, I punched in, "Touch one strand off his head and I will kill you." And pressed send.

"Ana, I'm not sure that's a very good idea." Christian was vaguely worried. "We could be dealing wi-"

Just as he was about to highlight the consequence of my action, the unknown number replied. "Find me if you can, Ms Steele. Bravery falls short in the face of practicality, but he's safe as long as you comply."

"He, she, they... know you." I could almost see the lightbulb appear over his head. "The kidnapper's a poet too huh."

"So we know he's reasoned, probably highly educated and definitely has a motive involving me." I filled in the inference for him.

Christian's eyes sparked, realizing that I had goaded the kidnapper into revealing bits of himself. "Pretty much narrowed Welch's search scope by a whole load. You're brilliant, Ana." With that, he leaned in to lock his lips with mine.

It was a passionate kiss, one that spoke of the worry he had upon realizing that I was in the center of this all. I kissed him back to annihilate the tension, reassuring him that there will be no rash decisions taken on my own accord. In all sense of the situation, I will follow protocol. I needed him to feel and realize that I trusted him to bring my best friend back safely.

Weeks, close to a month, of abstinence did little to calm the sexual tension that was thickening exponentially. Christian pressed me into the soft bed, my hands grabbing at his hair and his own skimming down the sides of my body. We moaned into each other, peaking the carnal desire we both had even more.

There was a knock on the door, "Mr Grey, Welch is on the way up with Mr Elliot Grey and Mrs Kate Grey." I had no idea Taylor was up. Did Christian even wake him?

Forcing himself to do the right thing, Christian broke the kiss mid-tongue fence. His treacherous tongue traced the outline of my lips, "Later."

"Time to save the world, Mr Grey."

Playfully, he gave a me a little wink and then hauled us both up from our reclined position. "Time to shut this shit down."

"ANAAAAAAA!" I heard her before I saw her. Luke's face was a pitch of white, with no doubt, he was exhausted and had just been recently woken up only to experience a Kate's scream.

I gave him a small pat on his shoulder in encouragement and then turned to ready myself for Kate. She sauntered into the room with her hand in Elliot's, her face tear stained and redder than I had ever seen her. Catching sight of me, she dropped Elliot's hand and made a sprint for me.

Before Christian could brace himself for impact, I pulled my hand out of his and started to meet her half way. "Kate!" Her hands wrapped around me like a snake about to kill its prey, I gasped for breath and quickly patted her back to soothe her as she began to wail once more.

"Kate, honey." Elliot was soft, "You're holding Ana a little too tight for Christian's comfort."

Christian was probably concerned over our children, his hand coming to clasp my elbow. But then again, we could not blame Kate for not knowing. I had yet to tell anybody about the babies. "It's okay, Christian."

Kate released me by a margin, still embracing me for dear life. "A-na, t-t-t-they too-k h-h-im." She stuttered. "MY BABY BROTHER!" She wailed.

"Welch." I heard the familiar order.

"Yes, Mr Grey. Unfortunately, Ethan's disappearance from Campus is confirmed," my heart stopped at this new fact, "and the video sent to Mrs Kate Grey's phone was from a signal bounced across a few satellites. That will take a while to trace but my men are on it."

"How long?" Both the brothers demanded.

"It's hard to say, sirs. Whoever did this knew what he was doing, it's like he created a Rubiks Cube for the security team. After we locate the original signal, something we have no way of speeding up, there's still the matter of tracing the pattern to find the source." The poor man sounded exasperated but confident that he could do it.

"Ana's phone?" Christian continued.

"What?" Elliot piped up, his hands on his hips at the new information.

Christian pursed his lips whilst he explained, "It's directed at Ana she received a photo of Ethan and a threat."

"Ana!" Kate squealed, pulling away from me to check if I was alright. "How's Ethan?"

I shook my head at her, my heart wrenching at the visual of Ethan's tortured face. The side of his forehead bleeding profusely.

"It was iMessage. So surely, that will be easier to crack."

"Yes, Mr Grey. Unfortunately, it came from a phone reported stolen four hours ago." Welch was irritated as well. "I traced it, same pattern as the first."

"You're fu**ing kidding me right now." Christian folded his arms crossly.

"Kate." I whispered, beginning to fear that Christian was about to combust at Welch.

"Here, I'll take her." Elliot stepped up, circling Kate's waist gently and tugging her into his embrace.

"Thanks." I mouthed at him as she nestled herself into his neck.

"MY WIFE AND MY FAMILY ARE THREATENED AND YOU'RE TELLING ME YOU CAN'T DO FU** ABOUT IT?!" Christian hollered, balling his fists in anger.

Welch shrunk under his penetrating and accusing gaze, mostly just a smart tech-whiz who would fail physically. "Christian," I took his hand and kissed his bicep. His enraged eyes flew to me and then softened. "He's doing his best, love."

Closing his eyes, Christian sighed and put an arm around me, pulling me close and kissing the top of my head. "Taylor, could you please get Welch a glass of water?"

Instantly, Taylor made his way to the kitchen.

I offered Welch a comforting smile, "You're our best shot at getting Ethan back."

"Yes, Mrs Grey." Welch had the weight of the world upon his shoulder and when Taylor came back with the water, he was more than grateful.

"We managed to narrow it down a little." I tried to inject optimism into our otherwise bleak atmosphere. "The kidnapper is educated, motivated and this is definitely personal." As proof, I gave him my phone.

Welch scanned the conversation. "This is unconventional for a terrorist or paramilitary group of any sort. You're right, Mrs Grey. This is more a game than anything else."

"We just have to learn to win it." Christian was finally back to his calm self. "Welch, Elliot, lets proceed with protocol." Elliot nodded at Christian from the corner, kissing Kate's forehead. "Ana, baby," Christian squeezed me tenderly, "Will you and Kate get some rest?"

"That's highly unlikely." Kate sobbed as Elliot released his hold on her to head for Christian's office.

"But we'll try." I promised with a beam, leaning up on my toes to give me a peck on his cheek.

"I love you, Ana Grey." Christian muttered, kissing me back once more before leading the men into the office.

"Come on, Kate." I held onto my best friend with the realization that my other was missing. "Let's go roll around on my bed, Christian just got new pillows." I tried to distract her, knowing I was working on distracting myself too.

"What the hell is this?" Kate groaned mid-whine upon seeing my bed, "Is this a bouncy castle?"

It was then that I decided to steer my best friend completely away from her missing brother. "Kate." I called, placing both my hands on her arms. What I was about to do would be considered heretical as even my own mother had not been informed.

"What is it, Steele?" She pouted slightly, sad eyes reddened at the developments.

"Kate," I smiled at her. "I haven't told anyone this yet and you're my best friend..."

She narrowed her eyes at me in suspicion.

Oh, crap. "But Ethan has been informed and of course Christian knows too." I quickly corrected myself.

Kate glared at me, turning the atmosphere intricately morose. "I think I know... but you know how I hate surmising."

Emboldened by the need to be, I cleared my throat and gesticulated at the cushions, "Christian's taking precautions."

"For what?! An impending back surgery?" Kate snapped, knowing Christian's peculiar little personality.

"Actually, something along the lines of back support." I bit my bottom lip, beginning to lose my courage.

"Steele."

"I'm pregnant!" I whispered, squeezing my eyes shut as my hands came to protect my baby bump.

When a good two minutes passed and nothing followed, I cautiously opened my eyes a millimeter at a time. Kate's eyes were wider than the moon, filled with surprise and lit with… joy.

"Kate?" I poked her in her rib.

"Stop that!" Kate brushed my finger away, "I have to protect my baby too."

"WHAT?!" I pretty much screeched before I could close my mouth and Kate erupted into giggles, she grasped my hands and nodded at me. "OH MY GOODNESS!"

Any woman would be thrilled to be pregnant and have a best friend help pull her along. But every pregnant woman would die for a pregnant best friend who could experience the same things they were together.

"You're not even showing!" Kate accused.

"I hide the boys under baggy clothes that Christian insists I wear." I explained.

"BOYS?!" Kate's eyes widened past the moon, rivaling something far larger.

I nodded, flushing.

"Oh wow!" Kate's excitement began to drain, her smile wavering at an unwelcome thought. "At least you managed to tell Ethan… I might… never…" She was suddenly frowning, fighting the tears.

"Don't think that way, Kate." I stepped forward and clasped her to my chest, soothing her once more. "Elliot and Christian are far capable and together, they will be able to bring him back safe." Even as I said it, I sent a silent prayer for divine intervention to guide them both onto the right track.

Kate's tears began to seep into my shirt. She nodded meekly, "I trust Elliot with my life."

"And I, Christian."

"I just keep contemplating and processing, over and over again." Kate sunk into my hold languorously, "I keep trying to think of who I pissed off to deserve this, to put my baby brother in harms way."

"Katie," A spread of sadness loomed overhead and guilt tainted me. "I'm sorry, baby. I think it's me."

"What do you mean?" She sobbed, whimpering a little.

"The threat I received said: Yes, Ms Steele, this has everything to do with you." I admitted, the situation paralleling itself to a convict in court. I could feel the heat of tears beginning to start in my chest.

Kate stepped back, her gaze confused and slightly worried. "What? You're the one they want?"

"I think so," I shrugged, "But I don't understand why they couldn't just kidnap me. Why did they go after Ethan?"

Kate pursed her lips, "Don't think like that, Ana. You're practically our sister too, losing either one of you in place of the other won't change anything."

"I don't know…" In all seriousness, I wanted to be in Ethan's place. He could be here with Kate, holding her in his embrace and promising her that he'd get me back. He would not be hurt and missing. He would be safe.

"Ana, it's not just you anymore." Kate reminded me, helping me down to my bed. "You have to understand that whatever it is, we'll get through this."

Suddenly, the tears began to stream down my face. Kate was still being so nice to me. "I can't help thinking that this is my fault," I cried, brushing my tears back with my hand.

"No honey, no." Kate reached for the tissue box and dabbed my cheeks dry. "Whoever did this is a sick bastard, regardless of his motivation."

"I'm so pathetic." I cried harder, "I wanted to comfort you and here you are, comforting me."

The irony was not lost on Kate and she chuckled lividly, "Babe, just being with you is comfort enough. Don't you see that?"

I nodded at her sadly, trying to reassure myself that my best friend did not hate me for getting her brother kidnapped. _Well, since you put it like THAT. _My inner goddess rolled her eyes at me.

"I'm still trying to think about how to tell Mia." Kate sighed, "Even Elliot does not want to deliver the news."

Mia Grey. She was yet another problem that was sticking out like a sore thumb in my seamless relationship with others. Even though Ethan and I had vouched and reverted back to our friendship, Mia and I had gone beyond salvage. Even with my marriage to Christian, she still could not trust me with Ethan. Ethan had been boggled out of his senses and decided that they would keep some distance until he was done with university.

At family dinners, Mia and I often kept a good distance between each other. The Grey family, well aware of the delicate situation, would graciously steer clear of any… sensitive… topics or names. It disheartened me to know that I had ruined a friendship I had once held so dear. I had betrayed Mia and was paying for it every day.

"She'd be devastated," Kate said grimly, "Ethan told me they finally got together."

At Kate's words, something clicked. In the corner of my mind, wrapped with layers of intuition, the horror of a possibility crept up on me. "Kate, I need your phone."

"What's wrong?" Kate was suddenly alarmed, patting herself down to find her phone. "I think Elliot has it. What's wrong, Ana?"

Ethan was down. That would mean his phone and all those private messages and other little details as well. It was a trap in itself, a card waiting to play itself. I could not take the chance that the threat was directed at me. Surely, if it was targeted at Christian, they would take someone… closer… someone Christian would fight with all his being for.

"KATE!" The time bomb was ticking.

There was a knock on the door. Kate and I both peered up to find Luke's head sticking in.

"Is everything alright?" Luke probed, his face etched with worry and exhaustion.

I leapt up from the bed and raced to Luke. "Luke!" I suddenly lost my words, Luke himself stunned from my unprecedented attack. He stumbled out into the living room where all the other men had just immersed from the office.

"Ana?" Christian's familiar probing self grew distressed.

There was no time!

Frantically, I patted Luke's chest pocket for a phone. _NADA. _Quick quick quick. I searched him like an immigration officer, my hands flying down the side of his pants. Bewildered, Luke found himself disarmed and with his hands raised into the air.

"What is this?!" Christian snapped, striding forward.

His pockets came up empty.

_Which body guard does not have a working handphone on him at all times?! My inner goddess was in disbelief, searching through boxes of her own._

Just as Christian's hand came around my wrist, I felt it at Luke's back pocket. When Christian tugged my hand away from harassing Luke, I gleamed with joy at the phone. Of course, once the crisis was over, my mute moment was gone and I unlocked the phone, "Do you have Mia's number?"

"Of course." Luke blustered, stepping forward to help me with it.

He was quickly cut off by a possessive Christian, who eyed me with questions I had no time to answer. Peeking around his boss, Luke pointed at his phone, "Saved under Ms Mia Grey."

"Thanks, Luke." I muttered, retrieving my wrist from Christian and beginning to dial.

Finally on the same page, Christian raised his eyebrows, "What are you thinking?"

"They might try to grab Mia too with Ethan as their cover." I informed him as the phone kept ringing.

"Fu**." Christian sweared. He turned to Elliot, "When's the last time you spoke to her?"

Elliot was gawking, disoriented at the mere thought of anyone taking his sister from him. Kate came to hold his hand and soothe him. "I don't know."

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW?!" Christian flared.

I put a palm on his chest and shook my head at him, instantly calming him down.

"Yesterday morning." Elliot recalled.

The line turned dead.

Christian was two steps ahead of me. "Welch, I want a trace. Taylor, bring in Barney. Luke, up security for every member of my family." His hand tensed around mine and I looked up into crazed grey eyes, tinged with anxiety. Much lower and softer, Christian leaned in to whisper, "And you, never leave my side."


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18: Chasing Cars

_Don't be impudent!_ My conscience pleaded with the more mature side of me.

I was here twiddling my thumbs as the world around me was about to collapse. The lights in this room were too garish for my liking, especially since my life was dimming by the second. At this point of time, roughly 5 AM in the morning, my best friend had been kidnapped and my sister-in-law had disappeared off the face of the earth.

Of course, Christian had insisted on dealing with this himself. Himself referring to everybody but Kate and I. The men were huddled in the living room discussing tactics and options. Unlike Kate who was already fast asleep from the exhaustion, my well rested mind was awake with a vomit of questions to the unresolved problems before me.

I watched Christian intensely as he moved about from instructing Taylor and Luke to glaring at Welch's new findings and then to demanding Elliot work faster in bringing his parents to safety. He was the King of the universe once more. Unfortunately, I knew this man inside and out. His facade of placidity had its cracks, something I had grown attuned to picking out.

Christian was worried about his little sister. I could see it in his beautiful grey irises that had screwed up ever so slightly. They coined me into his mental state, which was probably perturbed in more ways than one. But he was trying to keep a strong front for those around him, to lead the way to winning this.

It pained me. "Christian."

Only Christian looked up, the other men focused intently on their various tasks. "Yes, Ana?"

"Can I talk to you?" I tried to find the bravery in my voice. Dammit, he was my husband!

Immediately, he relaxed. "Of course, baby." Without another word, he maneuvered around the other men, coming towards me. Very gently, I shifted Kate's head from my lap to the comfort of the couch.

"Elliot," Christian called as he began to help me up. "Maybe you should carry Kate up to one of my guest rooms, the two of you can stay here with me tonight."

Elliot sighed, "Thanks Christian. Looks like mom and dad will be crashing here too. They're on their way."

Blatantly ignoring him, Christian leaned in to press his soft lips against my cheek. "Where would you like to talk? I suppose not here?"

I shook my head at him.

Christian's exhausted face broke into a cherubic smile as he chuckled, "Come, love." He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and led me away from the crazed atmosphere.

"Is anything the problem, sweetheart?" Christian asked as we made it to our bedroom. He turned, his fingers coming to brush the hair out of my face as he gazed at me lovingly.

I felt so cherished under his stare and could not help but be emboldened by it, "Are you okay?" Just the thought of the situation stripped Christian of his carefree demeanor, once more, he slunk back into a troubled expression. "Hey, I'm here for you." I told him, stepping forward to embrace him.

Christian nuzzled the top of my head, "I want to find Mia. It shakes me to have no clue to where she is."

"I understand." I cooed, soothing his back with long strokes. "She'll be alright."

"What if whoever's behind this has her, Ana?" Christian groaned.

"We don't know that for sure." I reminded him, "And even if they do, we'll get her back. "

"But at what cost?!" He snapped, pulling away from me. His hand flew to frame my face, his eyes crazed once more. "What if they want you for Mia? Or you for Ethan?" So this was the source of his panic and torment.

"I w-" I began to explain to him that I would go quietly in exchange.

"Please, Ana." He narrowed his eyes at me angrily. "We're all aware of your bloody altruism policy. There is no way you're stepping into this mess. I want you safe and by my side forever. Do you understand?!"

Forever. I like the sound of that. "Ch-"

"Do you?!" He pushed. "Ana, it's driving me mad just thinking about losing you."

"It won't come down to that." I promised.

My inner goddess raised her threaded eyebrows at me, incredulous that I would actually keep myself safe when it came down to it.

"Of course not!" Christian grimaced, jaws clenching. "I won't let it." Ah, Christian. My ever so consummate dictator who could control the world around him. "I don't fuc*ing care if it's a vendetta. I don't care if you killed someone and this is revenge. Nobody gets to you. NOBODY!"

"Yes Christian." I whispered, kissing him gently on his chest.

He softened at my touch, reciprocating the kiss with one of his own. Panic from the situation was still fresh in my mind and it drove me to seize this moment before it was gone. Before anybody could take away my Christian. I leaned up on my tiptoes and pressed my lips against his, sharing his heat.

Whether it was out of passion or a worry for my posture, Christian swooped me up into his arms and guided my thighs around his waist. His lips were urgent against mine, prying me open and slipping his tongue into my mouth. When our tongues met, the carnal desire burned dip within me and I thrust my chest forward.

Distracted by his consummate kissing skills, I did not realize we had moved until he lowered me onto the bed. He did not break the connection, instead, he turned it up a notch. I wriggled my way down so that our groins were against each other. We both let out a hungry gasp.

Moaning, I laced my fingers through his hair and tugged. Christian groaned, beastial and lost in the ecstasy. This abstinence policy was slipping and I was going to seal the deal. I nipped his bottom lip, throwing his rationality off balance. I opened my eyes to a fiery grey that reminded me of my husband's infallible sexual skills.

Christian stared back at me, as if shocked that I had just bit him. Playfully, I let my fingers slide down to his chest and began to undo the buttons one by one. He caught my hands in one of his own before I could finish, I could see a sense of reason returning to him and knew I had to distract him better.

"Chris-tiannnnnn," I purred, licking my lips seductively. "Don't you miss being... In me?"

His eyes widened and I could just hear him recall our many sexual escapades. He just needed a little bit more... Encouragement. Leveraging on our clasped hands, I guided him towards my heated crotch.

"Oh crap!" He hissed under his breath, the back of his palm now against my underwear. "You're fu*king soaked."

"Just the thought of you turns me on." I lured him in. "I want you in me. Now."

Finally, he cracked in the way I wanted him to. He threw his head back in exasperation for a moment and then dived down to nip at my neck, licking and sucking, biting and... "Aghhhhh." I groaned, my head in a whirl.

It was then that I felt his fingers go in search, pushing my underwear to a side and toying with me. His slender and dangerously long fingers slid against my sex, stroking me up and down and up again... Everywhere but my clitoris. It drove me mad and I moaned loudly.

"Yes baby, let me hear you." He said between his teeth, barely able to control himself.

"CHRIIIIISTIANNN." I begged, my voice whiny and high.

Bringing his lips back to mine, I felt him enter me with two of those fingers. I panted against his lips as he started of slow, gliding in and out of me until the room filled with the sound of my slick wetness. I could feel his arousal against my thigh, knowing that that sound pleased him too.

Before I could control myself, I felt myself explode around his fingers. He waited for me to climb back down from my high. "Shi-t. I'm so s-orry." I muttered against his lips.

Christian pulled away to smirk at me, "It's alright, baby." He kissed the top of my head. "I'll take you there again."

YES! My inner goddess threw her hands up in the air and celebrated.

"Yes... Please... Would you?" I pleaded once more.

He nodded in consent.

With the green light, I wanted to undress my husband. Catching him by surprise, I pushed him onto his back and attacked his trousers, fighting to drag them down. My hands shivered at the thought of his full length entering me. The sound of Christian's carefree laugh filled the room, "Need some help down there?"

"I know how to undress you!" I snapped, urgent.

My response drew out another round of chuckles from Christian, "Alright alright, no need to get feisty." He chucked his shirt at the chair, right on target.

It seemed like an eternity but finally, his member sprang up before me. In all his glory, he was big and long and sexy in every single way. "Let me just..." He started, dragging his pants off and tossing them aside as well.

Then, he stripped my clothes off and did the same. A mischievous smile played across his lips as he lifted my lace underwear to his nose, taking a good and deep sniff. His eyes rolled back into his head in ecstasy, "Mrs Grey, you smell heavenly as always."

As I pounced to have him in my mouth, Christian responded quicker. I found myself beneath him, but he kept his entire weight off my body. "No." He told me.

"What?" I pouted. Did he get me all worked up just to say no? His fingers and lips were mind-blowing, but I missed... Him.

"A deal, Mrs Grey." He said cheekily.

"A deal?" I heard myself whisper.

He nodded, absolutely serious now. " Your promise to put your safety first."

It was so Christian to use sex against me! Still, I decided to play coy. "In exchange for what?"

As if glad I asked, Christian smirked. His knee pushed against mine and I felt the cold air brush against my exposure. I gasped. "Whatever you want, Mrs Grey." Christian licked his lips suggestively.

"I want you." I said immediately.

Christian laughed at my speed and he nodded at me. "I promise." To confirm his genuine intentions, he let his member bump against my sex. I lowered myself. Instantly, Christian was gone. "Promise me, Mrs Grey."

"You're using sex?!" I said in mock horror. "That's unbecoming of you!"

"Is it really?" He smiled at me. "I'd say my sex is worth the promise..." Turning the tables, he leaned in to nibble at my earlobe, sending shivers south of my navel.

"It really is..." I groaned.

"Then promiseeeeee." He whispered into my ear like a caress.

"I promise."

With no warning, Christian impaled me in one swift swing of his hips and we both cried out.

"FUC*!" He hissed, getting used to me once more. "I keep forgetting how tight you are."

I laughed, "I can never forget how well equipped you are."

"You're damn right!" Christian grunted, thrusting into me and making my eyes roll back into my head.

It was unlike no other and I came around him. "Fu**, I'm so sorry." I apologized once more. "I don't know why I keep coming early!"

"Hormones, love." Christian kissed me tenderly. "Don't apologize for reaffirming my sexual prowess. I can now prize the fact that I've made my wife come under a minute."

"I'm a prize?!" I gasped in mock anger.

"All mine." He smiled, beginning to move once more. "You feel so good, I've missed this."

"Blame your obsessive- AH" I squealed as he hit the spot, "-ness, your worry drives you mad."

He kept the pace slow, a sweet love making momentum. "I died a thousand deaths that day, Ana." We both knew exactly which day that was. "I won't ever want to be in that position ever again."

"I promise." I beckoned for a kiss and he closed his over mine once more, worshiping my body in every way possible.

**Stolen ; Dashboard Confessional**

**Love you like a love song; Selena Gomez**

**A thousand years ;Christina Perri**

**Chasing Cars; Snow Patrol**

**Please review!**


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19: Shoot, Shag, Marry**

**Author's Note!**

**Sorry for the long wait. I had the entire storyline planned out, but then I lost it in the midst of exam preparations. I feel like i'm running out of drive to write this story or any story at all. Gah! SOS. **

"ELLIOTTTTTT!" Christian hollered, for the second time tonight. "Taylor, get him down here now!" He pointed at Taylor.

Just as Taylor turned to head up the stairs, Elliot came bounding down. "Dammit Christian! What is it!" He growled.

Christian gestured towards the joining party in complete awe, the same that had wiped the words right out of my mouth. I stood gaping, my palm on Christian's bicep, at the surprise that had befallen us

"Oh thank God!" Elliot was the first to shout, his initial gruff demeanor breaking like ice at the sight of his little sister. Elliot stalked towards Mia and enveloped her into a tight bear hug, refusing to let go. "Where the hell were you Mia!"

"What is it?" Mia grumbled, clearly exhausted by the sudden need for her to be here. She returned his hug chastely and grimaced at the sight of me, sending chills up my spine.

I ignored her reaction the best I could, knowing she had every right to be angry at me. Quickly, I diverted my attention elsewhere. Mom and dad were looking like zombies. "Mom, Dad, please sit down, I'll get you something to drink." I ushered them in, careful not to get into the line of fire that was Christian.

He charged towards Mia and wrapped his arms around both of them, "We though you were gone, Mia!" He snapped, relief betraying his tone of anger.

"What is it, Christian?" Mom groaned a little, wiping her face with the back of her palm in hope of waking herself up.

I bit my lip, resisting the desire to tell her everything. This was Christian's role. Mom turned to me and raised her eyebrows in question, she was tainted with lethargy. "I'll go prepare one of the spare rooms for you, mom." As I began to step away, Christian's firm arm encircled my waist and drew me back into his chest once more.

"Gail, could you please?" He said politely at her, I had not even realized that she was awake. She nodded at him and vanished quickly. "Mom, please, take a seat." Christian gestured towards the couches and led them there.

Dad was clearly in discomfort at the uncertainty, helping his wife down and then immediately shooting Christian a pointed look. "Christian?" Elliot and Mia took their seats beside their parents, Elliot's arm wrapped possessively around Mia.

As Christian and I rarely had company over at Escala, all that was left was the single seat couch and Christian pulled me onto his lap. I blushed furiously and looked away. He rested his hands on my lap, shifting me to a side so he could see his parents. "There's been a kidnapping."

The room filled with a resounding, "What?!"

Christian clenched his jaw and made sure to divert his eyes from Mia, who had begun to be alert upon the news. "Ethan has been kidnapped."

"How's that possible?!" Mia screeched, Elliot quickly soothing her arm and trying to calm her down. "I just texted him a few hours ago!" She refused to listen to what Christian had said.

"You what?" Christian was interested. "When?When was this Mia?"

"Why?" She narrowed her eyes. "He hasn't been kidnapped, that's stupid."

I could not stop myself, "Mia, the kidnapper sent me a photo of Ethan... He was.. Hurt."

The reaction was instant, Mia leaped out of Elliot's hold and onto her feet. "Hurt?!"

Christian's palms shot up, as if trying to calm a mad horse. "Elliot."

"Babe, we need your phone." Elliot said softly, sitting up to grab her at the waist. "You need to breathe." He began to coax her tensed self down onto the couch.

Mia's beautiful eyes were crazed, the disbelief tainting them were soon chased by all forms of fear for her loved one's life. I could not bear to watch, knowing full well that I would feel those same emotions if Christian was ever taken away from me. In response, I shifted slightly to wrap my arms around his neck securely. Christian leaned in and kissed my neck softly, gently, reassuringly.

"Mi-" Elliot started again.

"FUC* TAKE IT!" Mia hollered, yanking her phone out from her pocket and tossing it at her defenseless brother.

"Mia..." Both her parents said in a reprimanding tone.

Mia rolled her eyes and pointed her finger at Christian, "WHY DID THEY TAKE HIM?!"

"Mia, honey," Dad called, "your brothers are just trying to help."

"Christian, please... Do explain..." Mom fatigued, having to deal with her bickering children as well. "I'm sure she's just disconcerted."

Christian nodded at them all, "We don't know why and we don't know who, but Kate received a message today informing her that Ethan had been kidnapped." Before anybody could probe, he continued, "Welch checked the threat out and unfortunately, it's legit. Currently, w-"

"Holy shit." Elliot snapped. Immediately, we all spun to stare at him. He glared wide-eyed at Mia's iPhone and shook his head. "The bastards tried to lure her!" Elliot's jaws clenched.

"Ethan texted me just over an hour and a half ago asking if I could meet him." Mia's eyebrows furrowed, a new expression on her face tonight.

"Meet him where?" Christian demanded.

"Just the bar from across Escala." Mia's voice was now soft and fragile. "I was waiting there... that's when I saw mom and dad being rushed into Escala."

"WELCH !" He shouted and instantly, the man immersed from some hidden spot that I had missed him before. It was then that I noticed three other men gathered at a corner, busy on their laptops, no doubt trying to crack that rubiks cube. "You heard what she said." Christian said, "Elliot, phone."

"Yes, Mr Grey." Welch was on it, taking the phone out of Elliot's hands.

Taylor stepped forward with Barney, who had clearly just arrived and had yet to be briefed. Welch turned to face him, almost in relief, "Thank god you're here! We need you on with Mike pronto."

"Why did they take Ethan?" Mia clenched her jaws, her eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

Christian hesitated, uncertain of how to proceed. Even Elliot looked away slightly, embarrassed even. Neither brother wanted to be the one to break the news, news that concerned me.

You're the reason why, my inner goddess sneered.

"Don't just sit there!" Mia screeched like a child, clearly too hormonal and too shaken to remember her manners.

"Mia, honey." Carrick crooned, reaching for her. Mia slapped his hand away and stared him down.

"Why won't you tell me?!" She barked at Elliot, the moment he shifted his glance to ignore her, she turned on her heel and charged to Christian. "WHAT ARE YOU HIDING?!"

From some unknown place that had never existed before, I heard myself squeak a little, "Me."

"WHAT?!" She snapped, her face turning red with fury.

"They want me." I said softly, as if a child caught in an act he had to claim responsibility for.

Instantly, Christian tensed. Mia's face twisted into a fierce snarl and she lunged at me, with his spidey reflexes, Christian leaped to his feet and grabbed her. "LET ME GO!" Mia hollered, thrashing in her brother's embrace. Christian's quick reaction had destabilized me and I found myself falling to the ground, landing painfully on my shoulder blade.

"ANA!" Christian's worried eyes searched me.

"I'm fine." I whimpered, finding myself feeble in getting up, like a baby on its back.

"FOR NOW." Mia screamed. "YOU BLOODY BIT*H!"

Luke rushed to my side, helping me to my feet gingerly. "You're alright?" He asked quietly, rubbing my arm slightly and looking pointedly at my belly.

Oh right. I was pregnant. I had almost forgotten about that little fact.

Mom dashed over as well, coming to take my other arm and searching for any signs of a miscarriage. She heaved a sigh of relief and stroked my arm gently, reassuring me that everything was going to be alright.

"WHAT DID THAT BITCH DO THIS TIME?!" Mia growled, resisting Christian's hold. "YOU ALWAYS FUC*ING MESS THINGS UP!"

"MIA!" Mom scolded, anger tainting her usually sweet voice. "That is no way to talk to Ana."

"I'm sorry, Mia." I pleaded, raising my palms up in surrender. "I don't know what they want with me."

"IF IT'S YOU THEY WANT, THEN SCREW YOU. THEY CAN FUC*ING HAVE YOU."

"MIA!" Christian was provoked to anger, pulling his sister to arm's length and glaring at her with that reprimanding grey I knew too well.

"EVEN AFTER SHE PRETTY MUCH FUC*ED ETHAN BEHIND YOUR BACK?! WHY THE FU** ARE YOU SO BLIND?!"

"Mia, that is enough." Carrick's voice rose above the chaos. Even the security details and tech team had turned to watch the fiasco. "You will go to your room now. Do you understand?" Even though it was soft, his voice weighed in with so much authority that Mia was silenced. "Your brothers and Ana have been doing nothing but looking out for you and this is how you disrespect them. I will speak to you privately."

At his words, Christian released Mia and stepped to my side, forcing Luke to take a step to his side too. "Are you alright?" He whispered, his hands caressing my stomach.

"I'm fine." I reassured him, observing as Carrick led Mia up the stairs after Gail.

"Mom." Christian said urgently.

"What's the matter?" Mom strode back quickly, "Is Ana alright?"

"Could you check Ana's vitals?"

"That won't be necessary!" I hissed at my over-protective husband. "I think I'd survive such a short fall."

"Mom," Christian studiously ignored my plea, "She's pregnant."

"I just did, honey." Mom gave him a gentle smile, "The child's stronger now and so is Ana. Dr Greene told me that you're definitely out of any danger."

Yet, Christian was still not entirely convinced. A wave of annoyance coloured his expression, "I really wish Mia would just grow up!"

I reached for his arm and held him gently, "She doesn't know, Christian. Only your mom does."

"Um..." Came a rather puzzled three of us turned to find Elliot still in his spot. We had completely forgotten that he was there. "Ana's pregnant? Why wasn't I told?"

"Ell-" Christian began.

"Kate's pregnant too." I giggled, rather facetiously.

"She is?" Christian's eyes widened at the news.

"She told?" Elliot seemed slightly abashed, he smiled meekly at his mom, "Surprise?"

Mom stood rooted in her position for a good time, her face a complete blank. Finally, her brain clicked together and she shook her head, her face saturating with motherly joy. "Oh! Both my boys are going to be fathers!" She sang, clasping her hands together. "And I'm going to be a grandmother!"

I couldn't help but smile along with Grace, but the eye bags under her eyes drew my attention to a matter more pressing. "Mom, shall I bring you to your room? You look in need for rest."

Grace wrecked a sigh, her smile disappearing. "Is it that obvious?" She pursed her lips for a moment, "I just came out from an 18 hour operation. That was... Tedious."

"I'm so sorry..." I began to say, the guilt blooming as I realized that we had woken her from substantial rest.

"Mom, I'll catch that fuc*er." Christian said with a determination.

"Christian!" She admonished, disapproving of his language.

"Mr Grey!" Welch piped up. All eyes turned to him. "There's something you need to see sir."

My heart fell. Christian nodded at him, then turned back to me, "Ana, please take my mom to one of the spare rooms."

"Ch-" I began to protest, I wanted to know what Welch had found.

"Ana." He silenced me with a firm glare, "Now please." Without another moment to spare, he charged towards the group of men and sat down between Welch and Barney.

"It's alright, Ana." Elliot leaned over to stroke my head, "I'll be with daddy Grey, we'll let you know if anything changes."

"Take care of him, please." I whisper as mom takes my arm.

Elliot gives me a firm nod of his head and one of those dashing smiles that he treats Kate to, "Check on Kate for me will you and steer clear of Mia's vision."

"Elliot!" Mom hisses softly at him, as if reprimanding him for bringing it up.

I try my best to smile at the both of them. "It really is my fault, I'm very sorry." Elliot's smile vanishes and mom sighs gently. I felt the fresh tears prick my eyes as the guilt washed over me. Something I did had caused all of this. But what?

Soft fingers caught my jaw and I raised my eyes to Elliot's comforting gaze, "Don't torment yourself, Ana. It's not your fault."

Such reassuring words... Which you do not deserve! My inner goddess snaps, disbelief coloring her tone.

"I know you care for Kate, Mia... And ..." Elliot cheekily looks back to make sure Christian's busy before winking at me, "Ethan."

I found myself fighting back tears at the amount of care Elliot providing me at the moment. I knew that if I were to open my mouth, I would cry once more. Instead, I settled for a tiny nod.

"Come here, soldier." Elliot crooned, snatching me from his mom's hold and into a warm embrace of his own. "We'll get this bastard, you have my word."

"What are you doing Elliot?!" Christian groaned from across the room. "Please stop fondling my wife!"

He pulled away and threw Christian a salacious teasing grin, "Come on Grey, we can share, right?" We were all treated to Christian's rare roll of his eyes, he folded his arms and glared at his brother. Elliot turns back to me, clearly on a mission to lighten my mood, "Your husband's possessive eh?"

I smile meekly at him and nod.

"Well," He leans into the ear further from his mom, "If you ever need help, you can come to brother Elliot."

"For Fuc*'s sake Elliot, take your hands off my Ana and get your bum here!" Christian growls, irritated.

In a large gesture, Elliot steps back with his palms raised like a criminal. "Good night, sister in law."

"Night." I say quietly, then shoot my fuming husband a soft smile, "I'll be in Kate's room."

Christian nods at me, "Please go, Ana. My mother's tired."

Mom seizes my arm once more and shakes her head at playful Elliot, "Go help your brother."

"Yes mom." He says with a toothy grin.

As I guide mom up the stairs and out of the sight of Christian, I hear Elliot tease him once more, "Two girls one Elliot!"

After settling mom into one of the rooms prepared for her, I went in search of Kate. I had no idea which room she was in and we had five spares. Coming across the first one, I pressed my ear up against the mahogany and strained to listen. There were muffled voices... And I could make out that this was indeed not Kate's room.

" I'm just so sick and tired of her!" Mia squeals, displeased.

"That's enough, Mia." Dad admonishes, "You cannot speak of your sister-in-law in this fashion ever again. It's exceedingly beyond the decorum I have raised you."

"But dad. I literally have to share her with Ethan! My boyfriend! All the time!" She pleads with him to see her side, "And now she's taken him away from me by some stupid error she made?!"

That stung.

"Ana makes your brother happy, Mia."

"And I don't deserve to be happy?!"

"Maybe Ethan's not the right man for you, you're still so young, there are many others out there."

I hear a sound from the end of the corridor and I straighten up immediately, alarmed. This house was way too big and there were too many corners I had yet to explore. I stared at the shadow that accompanied the curve of the corridor. There had been a sound, I was sure of it. My eyebrows furrowed... What could it have been?

Should I yell for help?! What if it was... The man behind this all? Was it even possible?

I took a steady step towards the bend, craning my neck to see around it. Quickly, I pulled all the moves Claude had taught me to memory once more, tensing to use them. My heart beat raced at the speed of lightning and I found myself slip into a pant, even beginning to feel as if I could feel the baby's heart beating along with mine as well. It then occurred to me that I would never be able to fend anybody off on my own.

_You're weak! Get help! My inner goddess begged._

If the man took me, he would return Ethan. I tried to convince myself. I was the only breach to the secure circle that was the Grey family. Just hearing Mia talk about me in such a way made me face the fact that they all saw me in that same way; that I was juggling both Ethan and Christian. Maybe... Maybe if I just went silently...

_But the baby, you fool! My inner goddess chided my stupid rationalization._

The baby! My hands flew to my belly just as my eyes made out the undeniable silhouette of a man approaching me from the darkness. It was too late to flee. Before I could stop myself, I let out an ear-piercing scream.

**Feel; Robbie Williams**  
**Enrique Iglesias; Hero**

**Please review and give me suggestions! I'm running out of juice/energy to write this.**


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20: To the moon and back**

**Author's note!**  
**Okay guys. I've been receiving a lot of reviews about my rating... To be quite honest, I don't know what the ratings mean and what the ratings do actually. Like... What are they for? And um, what should my rating be? Sorry! Thank you. And censoring words is my choice! I don't like them uncouth. Anyway, enjoy this one :) It's oddly longer than usual. **

He lunged forward and grabbed me, his hand fastening around my mouth to halt my scream. It immediately created a vacuum in my chest and I gasped for air, my hand reaching to push him away so I could breathe.

"ANA!" I heard Christian holler from downstairs, a strained and panicked yell.

"Shit!" Luke hissed, letting go of me and holding me at an arms length. "What's wrong, Ana?" He demanded to know, his worried eyes scanning mine in search of the problem.

It was then that I begun to cry. The weight of the entire situation and the guilt crashing upon me then and there. I found myself gasping once more, unable to control my sobs as the reality of losing Ethan tore my facade of calm.

Luke's eyebrows knitted together and he pulled me into his chest, attempting to soothe me. I keened softly and turned slightly to wipe my eyes against his sleeve. "I'm so sorry Ana, I didn't mean to scare you." He whispered into my ear, "I was doing a sweep of the apartment... I should've called your name first... I'm sorry... Don't cry."

Right on cue, the row of doors swung open and heads of the Grey family popped out in worry. Even Kate had her head sticking out, awoken from the sleep that I had spent ages helping her achieve. Christian burst into the corridor, Elliot and Taylor hot on his trial. "ANA!" His gaze softened upon seeing me, all his nightmares that had became real evaporated in the same second.

Luke cooed into my ear, patting my gently as Christian strode over purposefully. "What's the matter?" He asked, seizing me from Luke and hiding me under his wing.

I wrapped my arms around my stronghold, knowing that whatever I faced, he would be my constant protector. I was safe in his arms. Christian was the lighthouse guiding me home in this turbulent storm that was just shaking my boat.

"She's just on edge." Luke explained quietly as Christian kissed the crown of my head lovingly.

"Hey bro, I think you should take the night off." Elliot muttered from a distance, "Your little lady needs you."

"Sir, rest assured that we will have everything under control." Taylor reassured his boss.

Without another word, Christian lifted me into his arms like I was a newborn baby. I rearranged my hold, looping my arms around his neck and hiding my face in the crook of his shoulder. "Have a good rest, everyone." He said firmly, then turned and began walking.

"Ana, baby." Christian nuzzled the top of my head. "You are safe." There was a strong promise in his words. "You will always be safe in my arms. I'll never let anyone hurt you."

The familiar scent of jasmine coaxed me to look up, finding myself in our bedroom once more. Gingerly, Christian lowered me onto the bed and enfolded me in his arms. Pulling the covers over the both of us, Christian warmed my arms with his and kissed the soft spot behind my ear, "You really frightened me, sweetheart."

That only made me cry harder. The guilt laying upon me like the blade of the gallows. It seemed like all I did was create problems. I had stolen a brother, driven a couple apart, forced men to work tirelessly on finding a mistake I had committed and most recently, pained my husband. Nothing was right. How could I be a mother when I couldn't even get the reigns on my own life?

"I died a million deaths when I thought y-" Christian choked on his words, his arms fastening around me like a death grip. "I don't think I can let you leave my side ever again."

In response, I shifted in his lap so I could wrap my arms around him once more, pressing my lips against his neck. "It's alright, Ana." Christian tightened his grip around me once more, "Do you wanna talk about it, love?"

I shook my head. Talking would only make me feel more pitiful. I hated feeling so helpless. I knew I was making mistakes, continuously committing mistakes, but yet, I did not know what was wrong. I could not correct the problem within myself and it had spiraled to the extent that it was now hurting others. Others that I loved so gravely. I thought of Ethan and what we shared, knowing that I may never get the chance to be with him once more. Yet, it was my fault... I had barred myself from that chance by my own errors.

"Barney screened everybody who entered and exited the bar." Christian began.

It shocked me and I pulled away to look at him. He was willingly sharing this?

"Ah," His face brightened up instantly and his fingers came to brush my tears away. "There's my beautiful Ana."

"Don't stop talking..." I whimpered.

"Always hungry for information, aren't you?" He pursed his lips in mock annoyance. I stared up at him expectantly, willing him to continue. Wrapping an arm firmly around my waist, he pressed his lips against my head once more. "I want to protect you."

"I can't be protected if I don't know what's going on." I retorted, fighting my case. "I've got to know who to watch out for and who to keep an eye on, Christian."

"Ignorance is bliss, especially when you're concerned." Christian shook his head at my eagerness,"You have a shred of self-preservation and I won't let you gamble on our children's lives."

I was going to be obdurate on this matter, "More so, I have to protect my children."'

"Our children." he corrected. "Ana, I will protect all of you, no matter what happens."

It was time to lure it out of my protective, yet incredibly sweet, husband. Twisting in his grip, I placed both my palms on either side of his face softly. His eyes were the same beautiful grey, yet, tormented with the happenings he could no longer control.

"We're like sitting ducks in this fortress." He pouted. "I don't know if keeping you here would be better or..." He groaned at the uncertainty and ran his fingers through his hair.

I understood what he meant. We could either sit here in our fortress, where we were in a familiar surrounding to ensure we could protect ourselves or move from place to place to thwart a planned attack. It was difficult to defend ourselves when we did not know who the enemy was. All we knew was that whoever he or she was, I was the target. Deep down, I knew I could protect the Greys if I turned myself in.

But you are a Grey and you are carrying a Grey! My inner goddess chided at me.

"What is it, Ana?" Christian's voice was serious, deadly even.

I shook my head at him, "I brought this upon you and your family."

Christian sighed, "You are apart of our family and we will stand together in times like this."

"But it's my fault." I whispered, "I hurt Ethan... Mia... And you. How do I deserve any of this?"

Christian pursed his lips. "Why do you feel this way? Have I done anything to make you feel this insecure?"

I pulled away from him, my mind snapping. How could I ever have thought Christian Grey was incapable of love? "NOTHING!" I blustered, "You've been perfect!"

His eyebrows knitted in confusion at my words, unable to find where he could blame himself for my demise. It only made me feel worse. He always failed to see my flaws, believing the problem to stem from something within him.

"Christian, I'm the problem!" I sounded exasperated for him to see, for him to realize that he was the angel here. He had always been. My guardian angel. "I walk all over you, kiss Ethan," he flinched" toy with both of your feelings, hurt Mia, get Ethan kidnapped, break Kate, put your entire family under house arrest and YET!" I throw my hands up in the air, "YOU'RE. STILL. HERE!" I was in complete disbelief.

"You don't want me to stay?" He looked alarmed, his hands immediately reaching for me like vines in search for sunshine. Except, he got it wrong! I'm the vines, I'm the vines hungry for the sun that was Christian Grey. He gives and gives and I take and take, yet, he was still here.

I shook my head at him with a rather sad smile, "That's the thing," I sighed, "I love you and never want to let you go."

"Sounds like a fairy tale to me." He smirked, a naughty twinkle in his eyes as he stroked my palm.

But I needed him to see this. "Christian, I don't deserve you. Can't you see that?"

His smile vanished, his face a mask of seriousness once more. "No, Ana, I can't."

"You'd have a happy little sister with a perfect brother in law, a sister in law with a brother, an entire family safe from harm and you..." I stroked his jawline softly, "you... You'd be married to a wife who loves you, who was always faithful, who will always obey you and... Your children will have a mother they can respect and love for eternity come."

I watched as his eyes grew distant, observing the family portrait I had painted for him. It must have impacted him, because his posture softened. Sadness blossomed within me as I acknowledged that this was the family Christian deserved, a broken boy who was now fixed will thrive in a complete and whole family. The first of my tears trickled down my cheek as I turned my face away.

"No, Ana." Christian beckoned, catching my chin and wielding me to look into his sea of grey. "You're the only one for me. You love me. You're faithful, I'm the one who wasn't... I'm the one who allowed you to lapse into Ethan's arms. So that point is moot." He smiled a gentle smile, "You're obedient in just the right amount and our children will love you, because I know you'd make a great mom. I would have blossomed if you were my mom."

"Christian..." I muttered, my heart warmed with his undying and unwavering love.

"Yes, Mrs Grey," He whispered, pulling me into his embrace once more as he kissed me passionately."I love you too."

It was all I could do to smile at him.

"Now stop asking me to imagine a life without you," He growled at me playfully, "Because Ana, there is no life if you're not in it."

"You're one sexy man." I laughed, grabbing him and desiring to test out his kissing skills once more. He moaned into my mouth, his arms cradling me like I was a child.

Then, he lifted himself off me once more, his grey eyes driven. "Didn't you want to hear what the men found?"

I nodded at him, my sex drive placated for once.

"But we will sleep after this. Promise me, Mrs Grey." Christian lifted his eyebrows.

"No... Ruffling of the sheets?" I pouted, my inner goddess shining through me.

I was rewarded with one of Christian's blinding smiles, he leaned back seductively, "Oh... we'd ruffle them until Mrs Jones has no choice but to change them."

Everything south of my navel quaked in anticipation.

"You're distracting me."

"Yes, I am." I laughed. "Not deliberately. Go on, I'll be good."

"Mia entered the bar alone." He was talking. I sat up straight and listened. "The team monitored everybody who entered and exited the bar, but there was nobody particularly outlandish to peak our attention." He sighed and shook his head, "But there was a man."

A man?! I heard myself gasp.

"He had been sitting there since lunch. So we had not suspected him at first. He chose the seat that allowed his back to face the cameras and he watched Mia for awhile."

I felt an unwelcome shudder scratch itself up my spine. "You couldn't see his face?"

"No," he snarled, "The punk kept his face buried under a cap. But we don't know for sure... He could've just been a random man in the wrong place at the wrong time checking out my sister... He left shortly after Mia did, but then again, it was late and a normal person would have gone home."

Christian was crumbling before me, second guessing himself like never before. He had nothing concrete to hold onto, and his calm was slipping faster than I could catch. Pouncing on him, I secure my arms around his neck tightly. Surprised by my attack, Christian twisted so I was under him. "I love you, Mr Grey." I reassured him. "I love you to the moon and back."

A gorgeous smile lit up his face as the beloved Christian returned, replacing the tormented one. "I love every inch of you, Mrs Grey." He leaned in, his nose bumping against mine, stroking mine at a loving pace. I relished his touch, feeling like the most blessed woman on this earth.

* * *

The sleep drained from my system and my eyes began to open. It did not surprise me that it was still dark outside. I had already had a good sleep before the entire drama fell upon us. It was Christian who needed a rest... Turning to him, I observed as he slept as deeply as a child. I hardly got the opportunity to watch him sleep as he was usually in bed after I was and up before I was. A small part of me desired to record this on tape, but I knew how truly creepy that would be.

Christian was like a Greek god carved out of alabaster stone, his jaw so ruggedly sharp and skin so delectably smooth. I resisted the urged to run my fingers through his stubble, desiring for him to sleep in a little longer. Sleep could be his only escape from the chaos surrounding us. Atleast until sun rise. Twisting, I caught sight of the bed side clock. It was 5.40AM in the morning.

Quietly, I let myself out of the room. I wondered if Taylor and the men were still up and outside, cracking the impossible code to locate our man. If they were, I could make them some supper... Or early breakfast, at least as a sign of gratitude. Once again, the feeling if guilt lay itself upon me and I tried to shrug it off. Whoever who was doing this was a psycho. I had never done anything to harm anyone.

M_y inner goddess rolled her eyes at me in disbelief. Bitch, please._

True enough, I see Barney still on his computer, jabbing away at it like a mad man. All the MacBook laptops were open around the dining table, codes running through each and everyone. However, only Barney was still up. The rest of the men were passed out, splaying along the chairs in exhaustion. Poor things.

"Barney." I called softly.

He jerked up in his seat and look at me, his eyes red at the corners. Ah crap. "Mrs Grey." He said softly, trying not to wake the others.

I smiled meekly at him and waved, "Can I get you anything?"

Barney looked dead-panned. "No thank you, Mrs Grey."

I nodded at him. I was still going to get him some milk or wine or something. "No... Thank you." I said.

He returned a soft smile, "We'll catch this bastard."

"Yes we will!" I shot him an air hi-five and bounded towards the kitchen.

"What the hell!" Screeched Mia, a hushed screech. Her voice shocked me at first but then I adjusted myself to the scenario. She was trying to get the microwave to start.

Trying not to startle her, I walked towards her until she noticed me. "Need some help?"

Mia gave me an icy glare, "Haven't you helped enough?"

Alright. That was it. This was it. I cannot take anymore of this bickering and bantering for the rest of my life. I had married Christian Grey and his family came along with the deal. I was going to make this work.

"Mia, I'm sorry." I tried for the umpteenth time.

That has never worked. My inner goddess chided.

"Your apologies are hot air." She snapped, folding her arms. "What else do you want to take from me?"

Take? I sighed inwardly. "Nothing, Mia."

"That's right," she smirked. "You already have everything that belonged to me."

Oh lord, I begged, searching for divine intervention. I had to make up with Mia somehow. Straighten this crap that I had wrinkled out! Suddenly, the sapphires on her ears glint in the light and she reached to tug at them subconsciously.

_Bingo, my inner goddess mouthed._

"Ethan's love for you knows no bounds." I started, before she could add a snarled remark, I persisted, " I know for one, that those ravishing earrings you keep playing with..." Mia flushed and stopped rolling them about with her fingers. "Were given to you on your birthday because they reminded Ethan of your eye color."

Her mouth popped open in surprise.

"I was more of Ethan's confidante and dating advisor than what you think I was." I smiled at her, "He tortured himself over what to get you, he kept telling me," I slipped into my Ethan impersonation mode, "Ana! I have to blow her away! It has to be corny and cheesy and crazy all in one present!" It made Mia laugh, the first time in a long time, and I found myself laughing along with her.

She covered her mouth, "That's true. He presented the earrings and said, I know I'm corny and cheesy, but I'm crazy about you."

It did not surprise me at all. Ethan knew how to impress, not in the Grey way, but in his adorable little cheeky way. "Yeah, he's crazy about you alright."

We stood there in the kitchen, just smiling fondly at each other for a long while. Finally, I decided to cut to the chase,"We both want to move on, Mia. But we can't if you keep insisting we hang back."

She sighed, the smile still hanging at the edge of her lips. "I know."

"I love your brother to the moon and back," I smiled at the memory of Christian's words. "To the moon and back, to the moon and back, to the m-"

"Okay okay!" She giggled, lifting her palms up to placate me. "I get it! You love my big bro."

I nodded at her, "What Ethan and I had was in the past. He's with you now."

Mia stared at me impassively, "But you miss each other..."

"Th-" I began to argue.

"No, don't." She shook her head at me. "I see it in his eyes and I see it in yours. But tonight, I saw it in Kate's eyes too."

"Kate?"

"All along I thought it was some romantic lure, sexual desire for the other of some sort... But I was wrong." She admitted quietly. "It's beyond that. What you and Ethan had in the past has shaped the both of you, and just like Kate and you are inseparable... I know that Ethan means just as much as Kate does to you."

I wanted to tell her she was wrong. That Ethan and I were nothing more than mere friends. But I would be lying through my teeth. We had history. There were so many times I had crashed and burned and he had caught me, saving me from myself. Similarly, I had been there for him through times of need. He had just become my best friend, someone concrete I held on to.

"But I hated you because... I... just can't live up to you."

"Live up to me?" I could not conceal the surprise in my voice.

"Ana, you're perfect. You exude a standard that has ensnared as great a fly as Christian where many before you have not." She pursed her lips, "And I can't live up to that... I guess you don't understand because Christian has never had any ex girlfriends, so it's difficult to have that constant insecurity that you're not enough."

Was she kidding! If only Mia knew about the streak of girls Christian had banged, who were all able to give him something I could not. Even worse, they were replicas of me, better versions even. I lived in constant insecurity, I was inadequate to have Christian at all. But of course, I could not tell her that.

Instead, I reached for her hand and smoothed it between my palms. "You don't have to live up to anybody else's standards," I told her, "Be yourself because only you are good at being you. Besides, that's who Ethan fell in love with, isn't it?" I stroked her palm, "Mia, you are unique in so many ways and if anyone tells you different, I will seriously mess them up!" She laughed a little. "That's if your brothers don't get to them first." I winked at her.

"Ana," her voice was suddenly timid. "I'm sorry."

Huh? I staggered back slightly. Why would Mia be apologizing?

"Earlier," she rubbed her shoulders as if she was cold, "What I said..."

"It's alright, I know you didn't mean it." I tried to help her along, to ease the pain of apologizing.

Her blue eyes flashed up to meet mine, saturated with guilt. "That's the thing. I meant every word."

Holy fuc*.

"I was just so angry at you, I have been for such a long while now that I see red when I see you." Somehow, in a twisted sort of way, I knew how she felt. Fuc*ing hell, I've become Elena in their relationship. "But when you screamed just now... And dad and I thought you were taken... I just..." She choked on her words and shook her head, despising herself.

"It's alright, Mia." I heard myself say.

"No it's not!" She waved me away, "I'm a horrid person. I wished you dead and for an instant there... I thought you were... It was... So painful... And I remembered how much I loved you and how we used to hang out..."

"Is it all in the past tense now?" I tried lighten the mood, teasing her gently.

"I sure hope not." She gave me a coy smile.

I reached for her and pulled her in for a sisterly hug, "Then it's not. We'll hang out."

"Can't believe I let a boy get between us." She blustered.

"Not just a boy. He's Ethan." as if the name itself could explain the predicament we were in.

Mia nodded against my chest.

"I promise not to tell Christian you alluded him to a fly." I teased.

"Oh my god. Please!" She begged, squeezing me tightly, and we stood there in each other's embrace for a long while just laughing at our silliness.

I finally had my sister-in-law back, and I was sure as hell going to work my ass off to keep her. There was nowhere else I would rather be, I had a loving family and a loving husband.

Now, I needed to get Ethan home.

**A thousand years ; Christina Perri**  
**Chasing Cars ; Snow Patrol**  
**I'm still here; James Newton Howard**  
**10,000 reasons ; Rend Collective Experiment**

**Please drop a review :)**


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